I look outside to see if there are clouds. I wait until the sky is dark and the wind is blowing swift. I listen for the distant thunder to know the time is right. I step out into the cold breeze and wait until the drops begin to fall. Then only when it rains do I cry because you are gone. Only when it rains so no one can see my tears. Only when it rains so the cold can numb my pain. It is the time I can forget you  and feel whole again. It is when I can feel sorrow for what is lost, only when it rains.