I don't want to be optimistic and try to see the good in this.
The only thing I know, I felt confused and you, I overflowingly miss.
I think of you when I shouldn't, our bond, it broke my system.
Would we be living in your seasided place or my crowded steppe kingdom ?
Would we be having fights over others or finally get over this symptom?
My wisdom tells me it's all over now, it's all a phantom.
Is it all because you cannot commit or I expect too much, foolishly?
To feel secure and loved without a doubt, tell me, for this am I greedy?
Our love definitions differ, and perhaps that's why we can't be together.
I wish I hadn't thrown your gifts into the trash,
That beige snow hat and scarf you bought me,
Not as easily as throwing a cheap piece of leather
I am dying from curiosity:
Thinking if you still keep my bear keychain or my grey beanie
Tell me, how's the weather in your city ?
And how's your mother after her surgery ?
I am only certain about one thing, I'd like to kiss your hands one more time, sincerely.
My feelings for you, they are deeper than what eyes can see,
And I'm afraid they always will be.

And if you look
Hard enough
Into tomorrow
You will see the
Future,
I will create.

Not out of hope.

Not out of love.

But out of persistence
In failure
And the strength
Of disobedience.

I am not a ray of light.

I am
A
Cataclysm.

Some poems seem to write
themselves;
I just move the pen.
Others are like lumps
of clay;
they refuse to be molded;
they need moisture and time.
This one is like
a robin that just learned
to use its wings.
It heads west, on a
gentle breeze, into
a tangerine sky.

Round and baby smooth
Before the heavy lessons
Now more gold than globe

Earned geography
Topography in bruises
Ridged in blue and black

Fault lines and canyons
Shining yellow Kevlar-filled
Stronger in the cracks

But this recent dent
is a gut-aching crater
that wobbled my world

So, I wait for healing gold
And grow stronger from repair

The greatest tragedy
Is that I'll keep loving you
Knowing you won't love me the same
But still hoping anyways

Everything will be all right —

a beautiful lie
we keep telling to
our silly, innocent hearts.

The truth is —

if everything
were meant to be all right,
nothing would have
gone wrong
in the first place.

In every silence, I loved you.

Like a gentle breeze on a sunny day, I loved you.

Like the calm after a storm, I loved you.

Like a ray of light in darkness, I loved you.

Like a rainbow after the rain, I loved you.

With every breath I breathe, I love you.