I want something that I cannot have. I cannot have it because I don't truly know what it is. I've seen it polished and propped as if it were on display and I've heard the stories of how much time and effort it took to make it look as such. But I want it. I want love. I want the idea of it at least.
I want the fights brought about by events simpler and less important than the time we wasted to have them. I want to be pained by the sight of her pain and know that the feeling of knives piercing my chest when I see her cry is there because I would literally drive them there myself, if only to prevent her tears.
I want our laughs to intertwine over the smallest things and our conversations to stretch our minds over the biggest. I want to see you sleep at night and I'll smile because I know that you're finally at peace. And I want you to smile when you wake up because you know that I'm fighting to make your reality better than your dreams.
I want love. I want romantic love, I want crazy love. I want passion. I want to pick you up in my arms and in that brief present get lost in your presence. I want to be in you when I am in you and have you wish that I would stay forever. I want to be in your heart and mind, and I want our love to be torturous and blind.
I just want love. I want the idea of it at least.

i know there is a little spark
of your love for me still in your heart
you should know that my heart burns
you set it on fire with your words, hugs and kisses

and that love you set fire to it will never be put out.

i want that love to burn us to the bones
and cleanse our souls
from pain and negativity
from fear and misery

so our love can flourish and bloom once again
just like plants bloom on the burnt soil
after the forest fire, young, fresh and pure
and they grow, grow and grow to become

big, tough trees putting shadows over
every problem we will encounter
because no problem will ever be bigger
than our love.

after four years of loving Him,
i have finally gotten over Him
in just two gorgeous months spent with You.

and now He wants me back
but i don't want Him.
it's too late for us, He had waited for too long.
now he suffers just like i did for four long years.

i build a three story home
inside my heart for You,
next to a river of my blood,
river flowing through my body
near the forest of my veins and arteries.

and there is no room for Him.
only for You.

Demons play a tune
Silent as snow
A tune everyone does know
And no one is immune.

A tune you hear in battles
Battles of a different kind
The battles of the mind
A tune that makes people eat apples.

Many think it is a tune of sin
And cause you to wince
False, since
Demons play the violin.

i walk down the street alone
through the crowd early in the morning
wishing you were beside me
so i could show you all the small things that make me happy
and i'd feel my heart is heavy like it's made of lead
because you're so near, yet so far
i can't get to you, i can't make you happy
you have to find happiness in yourself
then you will be able to love me back
to tell me that without hesitation
and we will be able to be happy together.

you will always be on my mind
you will always be every one of my thoughts
you will always be what i have been looking for
you will always be someone i never want to let go

i want you to be happy
to find peace within your soul
to realise we can have it all
to come back to me

i am thankful for meeting you two and a half years ago
for every precious moment we had had
for your smile, laughter and provocations
for every virtue and every flaw of yours

i pray for you every night and day
for you to be content with yourself
for you to find what you are looking for
for you to realise you are worth all of this pain i feel for you

you will always be the one who changed me.
i want you to be the one who will change me once again.
i am thankful for you who succeeded to change me.
i pray for you to be the one who will change for me.