nothing has ever felt worse than this

i dont know how to deal with these feelings anymore

its passed this time stop asking stupid ******* questions

white lights and vampires

sometimes
i will
i love you
words u will never hear

******* doing this inspite of what happens to my life thats how i know its real

you are a liar annn so much better than me

seeing who a person truly is changes your perspective of everything

this is past present and future
u should know ive always seen the last next to you and no matter where u are and i am i love u for what u are and ill never forget this strange connection that made me feel alive again

still afraid
but not going anywhere

my chain is a rope
above a sad gold elephant
hung to heaven from the floor

portrait of the american family in death

this is the beginning of the end of everything

it means nothing, just friends with my family, we were just *******, it means notthing

everybody has there own way to fight things i was wrong before maybe its something that u needed to be happy and thats okay im just doing it my own way

this that kind of tired u cant sleep out of

always faded

what is sleep
turn it into purple sleep

when i say **** u
it really means i lov u
when i tell you to leave
it really means i need u
and it hurts me
that it hurts u less
than it hurts me

someday it will be captured on stone
then this world will see how desperation grows tired of genies, beyond so much more the mask of your youth lingers like a lightning struck ghost in my brain crackling attuned to itsglow

why do some people add three periods onto everything that they say is it supposed to indicate youre thinking deeper isn’t that something that what your saying should already say

****

i hate u maybe more than anything for the way that u live and the way that you leave

im sorry i ever made this

your parents have a favorites and it isnt u
your god has a favorite and it isnt u
your girlfriend has a favorite and it isnt u
your wife is ******* her favorite
and she isnt ******* u

im desperately trying to fight this
no one is going to give me pills
i dont want to be helped
because i need to know that a human being alone can make it

this will never be more than this

lit a blunt and forgot the world exists

i know what this could be like half of it is better than my wholelife

its all alone and gone

i want to live like this on another level and its sad that everyone cant see it this way i love everybody and everything and i was struggling because so many people who were close to me could never live this way this reality is ******* im making my own

i dont trust in ****
i dont believe in ****

clouds of smoke
speak in exhaust
write in tongues
by their frail haunches they unlatch
then attach to my lungs

its a long way down and out

Takeoffs brain is empty, young dolph is at roscoes now as  Casper the friendliest ghost around Memphis, Sylvia’s head is still in the oven and I’m here disbelieving *** might be a ghost on a podcast but I’m alive and still can’t see what there is to be looking for on this side or the other no one is made for anything or anyone just to die and live while In life

So why

i wont be lied to

if u really care for someone..

i dont know what to say

u can focus everything on making something perfect to yourself or let it be the disaster it is and it will become perfect in its own standard, in the end i find it hard to believe that there will be any recognizable difference

if u dont hear from me know that **** is going like it should

why do people think im supposed to understand anything

how do u lie like being alive

forces self to think about **** no one wants to think about hates life for it

u cant even ******* listen

domestic life makes me want to **** myself and idk how to get out