My happiness is
Four-legged, wrapped in fur
When she's with me
All my sorrow gets blur

After a rough day
When I get home,  in complete despair
A wagging tail waits for me
to give me hope,  to wipe off any tears

She waits for me patiently
And never does she complain
When she jumps and kisses my face
She erases all the pain

Early In the morning
when coming out of bed seems so dreadful
She is there to wake me up
with a heart,  so joyous so playful

I encounter unconditional love
Every now and then,
Here I feel desolated
Here I go to her again !!!

I cried out to God for answers
While waiting for his reply
I forgot to do some living
'Ere I fell down to die.

Beheld I no great majesty
In wonders he had wrought
But pitied self for circumstance
That time and life had brought

Forbid that I would ever look
Beyond my meager station
And witness those at deeper lows
and show appreciation.

Hence, the twilight of my life
Has come, and shadow's fallen.
At last, across the great divide
I hear His voice is callin'.

Our answers come in all due time
And so little time is given,
So while you wait you might as well
Go do a little living.

How long will it take her to understand that your blood is laced with loneliness?
That the smoke staining her tongue cannot subdue the angry taste of your mouth?
That the hands that hold her neck want to strangle the air encased under skin
and no song
or word
or feeling
can dilute you.
why did I wish you cared enough to **** the life out of me?
Why I wasn't enough to ****.
You play with my insecurities like kittens,
laughing at how they can't jump high enough
teasing with what's just out of reach,
I was a mouse weaving through the holes
I thought
I had gnawed in you
but your hands stopped me in my place:
put me in my place.
I am nothing but a comfort when the weight of the world
lands on your chest,
I'm your oxygen mask
as the plane starts to crash
and you swore up and down you loved me
but years have made it clear you don't know what that means.
Your words are an empty void
I would gravitate towards them,
let myself get ****** in
you told me I'm different
that you didn't want to hurt me
though years of pain beg to differ.
I should have called you puppet master  
instead I called you dear
and I have realized I deserve better,
that I don't have any more years to give you,
but I still craved your attention
and your jealousy
as though I could teach you love and how to feel it right.
But at 16 I had you figured out;
you've only regressed since then.
and I should be used to people letting me down;
etching their names in my heart as a reminder
but you were supposed to be the cure.
The end to my self imposed suffering.
You bring no good to me,
trap me in the light of the child I used to be,
and your name haunted my lips like the last time you
kissed
me
but none of this would ease how I wanted you to hurt me.
Prove you cared with your actions.
Your words are white noise.
I need to focus on the swollen melody my heart is performing.
But how do I find closure,
To what will always feel

February second
The day beckons
Cries out
A joyful cheer
Older by the year
Marvelously so
Your day to glow
Wishing you the best
That you'll be blessed
With zest
And without stress
Nor worry
Soak up the day
Be spoiled
And let us say
Happy birthday
I love you so

There are no right answers.
The sky rejects the birds, turns them
over to gravity,
embedding them in the concrete and dirt.
The grit refuses to become a pearl,
just as the wound refuses to heal
and the flesh eats itself.
The market sees a sudden spike in
sales of Champagne and cyanide.
Coordinated efforts seek and fail
to curtail the rising tide of violence
in the nation's dreaming.
You realise that this crude, barbaric language
that you can't understand
is your own.
Beauty glitches and pixelates.
Frightened, furtive confessions of love
are unheard over proud, visceral
proclamations of hate.
Tongues divorce mouths.
Every now and then, a voice
inside your head says,
'Thud.'
The measures of sanity become
more quantifiable and
totally arbitrary.
The horizon
tightens
like
a noose.

It doesn't matter if this is wrong.
There are no right answers.