Needless to say I was ******,
I was absolutely distraught;
craving time to scream and yell and cry -
only i couldn't, couldn't render myself vulnerable;
let anyone see me failing -
even as i brought the gun to my temple

Why do I feel so empty?
This weekend with you is all that I've wanted in a while.
So then why do I feel so sad?
Her name keeps popping up everywhere.
I wish I knew where we stood,
And where you stand with her,
Where you stand at all.
I just want to be with you and forget about it all
*But I feel like there's another person in bed with us right now.

jealousy, the green-eyed monster
dangerous as a fiend.
it waits to pounce,
creeping in the shadows
it takes control, it takes over,
making you paranoid.
your jealousy,
your green-eyed monster
is making me want to give up.

those days when you're too sad to write
yet you know writing is the only thing that could possibly fix you
and in that moment you wonder
what will become of you when you can write no more.

can't find my way back home
I'm walking out here on my own.
life's a long and windy road
it's heavy and tiring carrying this load
I see you standing there along the way,
reaching for you, hopes just at bay.
I've walked alone sad and blue
this weary road is tried and true
fought my way through thick and thin
I'm searching and praying,
you're begging, let me in.
feelings, emotions are swirling around
confusion surrounds me
and I can't find the ground.
I fall astray, lost in the wind
forgive me baby for I have sinned.
I've given up and let you go,
chosen a path no one else would follow,
chosen a road no one could love,
become this person void of all love.
all hope is lost
I look to the sky,
and see you there,
helping me to fly.

my sometimes boyfriend
sometimes lover,
be my protection
and my cover
for love is easy
but not always true,
lust is simple
and I lust for you.
it takes me away
and frees my mind,
for just a little while
I can escape this bind.
your body on mine,
our hands intertwined,
kisses all over
and for a moment all mine.
but it can never last
and life goes on
but for now it's you and me,
at least until dawn.

Tired of these games,
tired of the plays,
I'm hanging up my jersey
and walking off this field.
I'm not gonna wait and see,
how it all goes down,
I'm leaving it to chance,
the rest is up to you.
what you see
is what you get
step in line and
make your bet.
they can try
and bring me down,
against all odds
I'll get around;
the fakes and
all the passes.
just watch them
try to stop me.
I'm at the starting line,
I'm ready, I'm set, let's go.

the tears are gone,
I'm on my own,
don't bother knocking
cuz nobody's home
I'm rid of you
it was meant to be
those feelings are gone
it's time you leave,
leave me alone,
just go away.
don't talk to me
I don't care what you say.
kiss me not,
I don't love thee now,
our love is over
I swear, I vow.

guess it was the truth
when i said i loved you more
for this pain that's deep inside
has never hurt quite like this before.
it's funny how it all worked out -
you turned my world inside out
and took me on your wild ride
your love and laughter blinded me
now with this pain,
i still can't see
can't seem to get you out of my head,
miss talking to you at night in bed.

is this what you wanted;
to make me cry?
does this make you happy;
to see me slowly die?
because that's what i'm doing...
i'm dying inside,
this pain that  i'm feeling
it's eating me alive
i see my heart on the floor,
smashed and scattered
i don;t know what to do now,
i'm all bruised and battered

if nothing lasts
but nothing fades
what is left
for us to gain.
hide your fears
behind the wall
count you steps
don't lose it all.
shadows conceal
but the sun is bright
our pasts revealed
in the light.
what hands can open
curtains cover
don't stow away,
love one another
it's all we've got
yet it doesn't exist
don't be afraid
to find you way,
don't look back
keep going, don't stop

i'm sorry i couldn't;
that i let you down
and broke your spirit -
left you out alone.
i'm not sorry i left;
stopped believing your lies
and playing your games
we were long overdue
a much needed goodbye.

such a pretty girl
with such sad little eyes.
good at hellos,
but better at goodbyes.
she walks the road,
her music blaring,
heart stone cold,
hope waning.
she's living on some **** and wine,
pretending that soon,
it'll be all fine.
her liver's failing,
her thoughts are sailing.
you'll see her come
and see her go
never realizing,
you'll never know;
who she was
or what she did,
how she tried her might to bring some peace.

you left me.
you promised you wouldn't.
i didn't leave.
you made me promise to stay,
and so i did.
through the hurt and the pain
and the wishing for death's sweet release...
i stayed.
but i don't know where you went.

let's hope this magic won't ever fade
because here in your arms i want to stay.
your love has been more than enough,
your arms around me, warm to the touch.
i look at you and it seems so clear;
together, right now
we were meant to be here.
your bright eyes sparkle in the sun
you make me feel forever young

The open road late at night,
Driving down 22 going 80 smoking a cig and smoking a bowl
That's when I feel most alive.
Taking the early exit just to drive by his house
One.
Last.
Time.

I’m sick of being single
sick of being alone.
I’m sick of being angry,
sick of being tired.
I’m sick of being sad,
and feeling so depressed
I’m getting quite sickof it
and asking you for help.
I’m feeling like I’m drowning,
will you pull me out?

the tears are gone
I'm on my own,
don't bother knocking
cuz nobody's home
I'm rid of you
it was meant to be.
those feelings are gone
and it's time you leave.
leave me alone,
just go away
don''t talk to me
I don' care what you say.
kiss me not
I don't love thee now,
our love is over
I swear, I vow.

for once in my life I felt beautiful,
and I felt like I was enough.
for once in my life whispers didn’t matter,
I was someone no one could touch.
for once in my life I was committed
and didn’t feel any pressure,
for once in my life I was risky
yet had never felt more secure.
for once in my life, those 3 little words had a meaning,
and for once in my life I meant them
and I thought you did to.
for once in my life I let someone in,
and tried not to push them away.
for once in my life I am heartbroken,
because for once in my life I cared.
for the last time I will feel this way,
for the last time I will cry,
but for once in my life I was vulnerable,
and for once in my life I am sure
that I will never be anymore.

in the dark, in the depth
he is prowling where she wept.
in the sun, in the sky
she's trying hard not to cry.
his life was taken, she is shaken
he left not much, in her waking.
*I cannot see, I cannot do
what is left for me to lose?
I've lost my love, lost my life
I cannot bear to fight this fight.
I wish to go, I wish to die,
end this life and say goodbye.
I'll see you soon, up in heaven
and if I don't it'll be my hell.
If I see you and we're together,
then I'll say that all is well.