when there is no cell
when there is no body
when I am on the edge
you rise
a wave
a sea
an ocean
embracing me
while I plunge

Lidia Vianu, from *My Cup of Light

"That's something poetry can do for you, it can entrance you for a moment above the pool of your own consciousness and your own possibilities."*
Seamus Heaney

it is not enough
the eyes, the ears,
the ebb and flow
of calcium in bones
of iron in stars
sometimes silence pours down
like a blessing
some left their offices
and they're now deciphering
the eyes of thunder
some inner power turns me around:
the tribes of air
the shapes of a child's wonder
the involuntary rehearsal of words
this passivity of language
like jazz phrases
the wrinkles of that woman
imprinted in my heart
(by her murderous fingers)
spring gives me rose-like mornings
(because of my bedroom curtains)

and there is something else
this feeling of oneness
the cedar and the flowering river
motherly care, exhaustion, or not knowing
and the hues of morning skies
countless fleeting little gestures
and the cries of birds
tearing solitudes
my complete abandonment to him
in the sea of time

I let the window open
every day is a declaration of love
even when I hate
the dance with the unknown
the inextricable
the polyphony of laughter
and darkness

you live in me during the day
and I **** your name each night
anew

i want to tell you the truth  
everything hurts, my organs
are  filled with black rocks and
i can't write poetry without gaining
weight, sometimes i wake up
in the middle of the night trying
to convince myself that i'm still alive
i’ve stopped eating anything but
apples and your pastel pink tongue
i want to tell you the truth
that my heart is a collection of
boys who  didn’t ask for my name
only whispered words like beautiful
into my neck, only painted words
like obsession  on my spine
i want to tell you the truth
when i cross the streets i close my
eyes and the thought of dying
doesn't make me cry anymore
i want to tell you the truth
last friday i got so angry at you
that i nearly burned all of my
poems, i threw a plate at my door
and cleaned up the blood saturday
i want to tell you the truth
that i am made of stone, my hands
are never warm, my skin will be grey
my soul is aching because you’ve
made it empty
i want to tell you the truth
i still love you, i still care about you
but when you ask how i'm doing
i'll say that i don't know you anymore

but all you will hear is "i'm fine"

You put me down next to the others

Let the soft wind blow my ash

You’ve been known as a bad lover

But I was a fool to let that pass

Smoked me in, I’m in your veins

Now I own you like no other

Go and try, exhale the pain

My vengeance cigarette burns forever

And we both know, you’ve tasted better.