I called you at 2am
because i missed the way
your voice crackled
in the static
even at an unreachable distance.
I lay here,
eyes shut.
imagining countless scenarios
of how I might see you again.
however,
you look so much better in my mind.
and online.


c.m.
8-19-14

364

The Morning after Woe—
’Tis frequently the Way—
Surpasses all that rose before—
For utter Jubilee—

As Nature did not care—
And piled her Blossoms on—
And further to parade a Joy
Her Victim stared upon—

The Birds declaim their Tunes—
Pronouncing every word
Like Hammers—Did they know they fell
Like Litanies of Lead—

On here and there—a creature—
They’d modify the Glee
To fit some Crucifixal Clef—
Some Key of Calvary—

I am no better than yesterday
Today did not offer
The promise of redemption
Or forgiveness

Instead I stare
Proud yet unfaithful
To solitude
Abandonment, they say

The clock is changing
But I am moving
Like a train of second chances
Backwards

I am no better than yesterday
And then it's midnight.

she looks so normal
beauty
covering up the sadness
alike
the makeup on her face

it covers,
so in that her beauty
a simple smile
makes this girl look so normal

but you must see
before you make an assumption

now crawl,
crawl in her mind
walk around
see, you'll be devastated of what
you come across

you must not
do not show that
you are close
she will push you out of her mind
never to let you in again

but in the end doesn't it all end in
a tragedy
love
"friendship"

either get close or leave
you have no other option
you cant just linger onto her
LEAVE OR STAY
leave or stay after you've crawled around in her mind and figured out the deepest darkest things of this girl.







                                                    ­                                           now make your chioce

You are naked.
Alone.
In this room you have been in countless times,
but is in no way comforting.
The walls are all white,
the floor, sky blue and white
checkered tile.
You look up,
the single bulb flickers for a moment,
you walk towards the tub
in the center of the room,
it is an old style tub
with the clawed toes.
You turn the faucet,
it begins to ooze
dark red.
Is it mud?
or maybe blood.
you plug up the tub,
and sit down on the edge.
You watch the ooze
slowly covering the porcelain
and you get in
you sit down.
The ooze comes just up to your knees now.
It is odly cold
staining your skin.
You shiver,
but lie back anyways
as if to relax.
The ooze creeps up over you
engulfs you
smothers out all your senses
except sight
everything is silent now
and you can no longer breathe
The ooze is all around you
sloshing over the edge of the tub
and staining the tiles
sky blue and red.

Your skin, your skin, your skin it haunts me
your skin, your skin, your skin it terrifies me

Every night I lay awake inside my bed
wondering where i went wrong

Your skin, your skin, your skin it haunts me
your skin, your skin, your skin it terrifies me

I pocket the white root of my enemy’s fantasy and bribe my father with money for a lottery ticket.  I hear god say yes it will be the god of all.  it’s a good day and on such my mother swallows her brother’s morning cigarette and tries to get someone to kiss her neck.  on such my sister wonders deep down if her doll is wearing enough lotion.  I think to flee but know fleeing looks on paper too much like what it is.  the skull is the grave of the brain, the skull is the boat…  if other houses catch fire it’s because ours is done burning.