1:35 am
in the indigo infinity of the night,
i could've loved you better.

2:18 am
between the folds of the sheets
and the ache in my bones,
i warmed you from the inside out.

3:46 am
we are two stars,
unable to put our words into
constellations.
we will be our own downfalls.

4:28 am
you pull my hair and tell me
you love me in-between the groaned pants
and one day, underneath the cracked lips
and trembling hands
i'll find the courage to say it back.

5:19 am
i am the inferno that'll burn
your paper heart down
and when you're left with the ashes,
you'll see just how much of yourself
you gave to the girl with the sleepy eyes
and bruised knuckles.
i am sorry.

6:21 am
like the morning sun,
i'll rise to fill you with warmth
but i will have to set again.

7:34 am
"i can't hold your universe together."
*-H.K

I see them clasping each other's hand,
planted on a wooden bench,
head on shoulder,
and carving a smile at the winter clouds.

They hold each other's embrace in the chilly flurry of air,
their eyes shut,
seizing the moment,
and allowing their hearts to slowly, but surely entwine with one another.

I gaze at them, longing for what they have.
My heart sinks at my despair and companionless thoughts.

The only thing I can do now, is to keep scrolling.
My eyes fixed on the screen of my device,
my thumbs flicker from one side to another.
I keep myself distracted, vacantly staring at the pixels beneath the tip of my index finger.

Ultimately, the thoughts strike in its final wave.
Anxiety flushes over my sense of self,
and I realise.
That I.
I am.
the odd one out.

Disconsolate.