i had an epiphany
while walking home --
that forever
isn't always
a promise.
it's sometimes just
a word.
one we say
to feel safe.

and that's the sad part --
i believed it.
i believed that
you meant it
when you said
that we were
forever.
i believed that you
meant it when
you looked at me
like i was
the ending
to your sentence.

now you pass me
like you never
started the story
in the first place.
yet im stil
trying to close a book
you left open.

the link if you wanna read it before it's uploaded here 🤍🤍

https://textsneversent.straw.page

and just like that
it's the first --
again.
a new month
arrives all too quickly
and too quietly
to prepare for.

they always say
that it's a chance
to start over,
to make new goals.
but i'm still stuck
in last months
grief.
in love that never
stayed.

everything now
feels muted --
calm
and in the wrong way.
its sort of like
the silence
after a gentle storm
you didn't see
was the end.

i used to think
love
was loud.
but the truth is,
it leaves
quickly
and quietly...
and all at once.

i told myself
that you never meant
to just
vanish --
but the silence came
like a tide,
slow
and steady
until it swallowed me
whole.

i watched the waves,
they pulled back too.
far enough
that i knew
what was coming,
wasn't just quiet.
it was a tsunami
disguised
as distance.

i waited
intently --
not because you promised,
but because my soul
believed that you
still could.

now every crashing thing
reminds me
of you.
not the goodbye,
but instead the space
you never filled again.

you touched my hand.
and it felt like
it wasn't the first time --
it was like
your fingers already knew
my own,
in some kind of
quiet before.

my heart,
it doesn't cry --
it stays
deadly silent.
like it's learnt
how to not cry
but instead,
ache quietly.

but my soul --
my soul weeps.
not tears atleast,
but in the way
that when i hear
your name
i flinch
at the sound.

theres no breaking.
no audible noise.
just a heart,
that folded in
on itself,
and a soul --
one that doesn't know
how to stop
feeling.

i say
"i don't care"
like it's a piece of armour --
almost like if i say it
enough
itll become
true.

but my soul,
it still aches.
in the middle of the
darkness,
in the silence,
it remebers
what my mouth
tries to forget.

i don't care.
but only
out loud,
the rest of me
still cares --
in the darkness,
and in the silence.