You cant blame me*
For being nice..

Whenever I would do anything nice
For anyone else,
It would always get thrown
Back in my face,
But for the first time
I decided to do
Something nice for you,
You said Thanks

I liked it.

So I did it again,
And again, and again,
Until your very definition of me
Was Nice
I thought being nice
Was the best it could get
It was wonderful and perfect
Until I heard you say something else

Pretty

But you never called me pretty
*Never me..

It's far too bright, too loud
I need to sleep somewhere without a sound
Close my eyes, just block it out
I need to sleep six feet underground

I don't think people
Really understand
How close I am
To committing
And I know this because
No one has ever
Taken the time
To listen

I wrote you a letter in our English class
I wrote it without hope that it'll make us last
I wrote it knowing you've made up your mind
I wrote it with a plea to save our time

You're a master at breaking down walls
And building people up
Until they finally start to believe
They're worth something after all

You're a true scholar for finding all my flaws
And nurturing them with love
Turning them into something beautiful
And never once causing harm

You're an artist of the mind,
Bending and twisting it to your design
So no one will ever be able to steal whats yours.

I was nothing but the easiest of challenges
Hardly a challenge at all
You broke your own record time
Trying to get to my heart
You even had me figured out
Before I knew for myself
You shaped my every thought
To revolve around you
And the worst part?
You have no clue
What you've done to me,
No clue what this will continue to do

I don't think I'd ever do it
But lately, with you, I might
Which is a lot more than ever before,
When I still thought it wasn't right..

I don't think I'd ever do it
But right now, I kind of want to let it in
Feel the pressure of something else,
Something not you, pressing against my skin..

I don't think I'd ever do it
But the opportunity to do so is in my reach
It's a just step to the right, an open drawer away
To finally find some release..

I don't think I'd ever do it
But lately, with you, I might
I've thought about doing it before too,
Maybe just once or twice..



I don't believe I'd ever do it
Because I don't want you to know
I can't let you see this side of my mind
*The one I'm too afraid to show..

How can I stress this enough...

6 ******* MONTHS

And I still have trouble speaking to you?!

AM I ******* 12?!

I'm so horrified with myself!

Why you're still with me is beyond my comprehension

When 1 out of 5 times we're together, all we feel is tension

Is this normal?

I ******* hope so,

At least then we know we're not the only ones dealing with the stress of falling in love with the one person who is exactly like us..

I needed an outlet for all these emotions
And the world gave me poetry
It lets me express myself to the best of all my abilities
Which isn't a lot, but this is what I've got
So I'll find a way to work through it,
If it's on my own or with other poets,
I don't know, But I don't have to know yet
Because there's still a lot of my life left
And I have to go live it, else what is life for?
Too many questions, throw on my boots and I'm out the door.

I'm cold
But you're heart has grown colder
And I don't want to believe this is over
So I wont
But you don't make it easy for me
I've been trying harder than you know,
But you haven't even took notice to all my effort
Your mind is lost in its own world
Your eyes don't see my crying every time you leave
Your ears don't hear me screaming "I'm trying, God, please!"
But it seems nothing I do is getting through to you
Even though this is everything you said you wanted me to do
I just can't think anymore, not now
I'm going to lay my head down,
Look up at the full moon you take such a delight in
Close my eyes
And pretend everything is okay

My scent
It lingers on your skin
The aroma is one of lust
That you must not let in
Because if you do
Everything about you
Will change
You'll be a slave
To the animal whom's only purpose
Is to love

I can't let my weakness show
I can't let these people know---
That I------------
             ()
I want to give up
up
up
up
oh-------
        (* x2* )

I'm so sick
                      Of all this ****---
I've grown tired
                     With all of it---
I've had enough
                     Of being--- perfect---

I'm done with being--- the girl
You want me to be---!
It's time to take over--- the world,
And finally be free---!
Don't try and stop me from rising,
You'll only be supplying my fire within,
There's nothing standing in my way now!
I. Wont. Back. Down-------------!

My poetry is called one of two things,
Cliche or morbid

I have no idea if either of those are good or bad,
So why can't people just say
Yes or no
Instead?

I am a selfish creature,
Deep down in my soul
My heart doesn't care,
It has grown too cold,
And only a few things
Ever catch my attention
You are one of the things
I crave to control

But my desire for you
Destroyed all rational thought,
I know if I linger longer,
I'll end up staying with you, caught
Between my cold familiar
And the new warmth you've offered me
Slowly, you're thawing my heart,
A price that cannot be bought

Roses are black
Violets are black
Everything is black
Open your eyes

I only wish I could see into your world
Just a little glimpse,
A sliver of insight
I either need confirmation on my theories
Or I need to dismiss them
How can I ever find sleep at night
When all I can think about is if shes on your mind?
Call me crazy, but it wouldn't be the first time
That you've found her more interesting to talk to
More beautiful to look at,
Or more satisfying than me
Please, let me in for a while,
Let me see whats behind your locked doors
It'll either settle my fears, leaving me to sleep peacefully
Or it'll shake the earth I walk on,
Causing me to slip through the cracks,
To my demise

God, do I ever love you!
And I'll take as long as
Needed to prove this feat true.

I am the definition of fool
I choose to believe you
When you spoke of love and forever
I should have known that
The sky only appears to be blue

I am the center of stupidity
I thought I could control my heart
Tell it to only love you so much
I should have realized I couldn't hold it back
And that you would have torn it apart

I am the queen at being naive
I thought I alone could be enough
To satisfy your needs and wants
I should have known it was a lost cause
But I kept on trying, even when I should have run



I'll keep on trying, until you run away for good

Don't say a word
Let your silence be heard
Let it carry your message
Like the winds carry the bird

What hurts...

- Is not being wanted
            By the one you want the most.

What hurts...

- Is having to let go of something
            You associate with home.

What hurts...

- Is falling in love,
            Knowing full well it'll never last.

What hurts...

- Is not having the strength
            To move on from the past.

What hurts...

- Is fighting with the ones
            You let see into your heart.

What hurts...

- Is realizing all your friendships
            Are quickly falling apart.

What hurts...

- Is losing someone,
           Who was never meant to leave.

What hurts...*

- Is having to see all the scars
           Hidden under a sleeve.

I don't know..
                      
                      I don't know..

                                               I don't know!

But you do, don't you?

                                            Because this is your choice,

                     *Not mine..

من واقعا خود را فارسی شاهزاده خانم؟ آیا شما تا کنون یک شاهزاده واقعی بود؟ چگونه من آرزو می کنم من می توانم به شما تمام این سوالات را بپرسید، اما شما فقط به من هم همین را بگویید - "البته که من شما را دوست دارم!" به عنوان یک چاقو تو را به گلو من .. لطفا، لطفا هرگز به من اجازه رفتن ..

It doesnt matter how loud I scream,
No one will ever hear me.

Look how easy it was for you,
How fast you got up and left me..

What happened to her smile?
She never seems to do that anymore
Not without faking and forcing it,
While her heart lies on the floor..

****** and broken

She use to be the happy one,
Always up for a laugh,
Now she's the depressed one,
Thoughts of suicide run through her head

Broken and ******

People see her walking alone,
But they don't wave to her anymore
They hide their faces behind their books
Afraid of her tears, her hurt, her sorrow..

Blue to red

She hates all the scars, the bruises, the tear stained cheeks
She always has and always will
Her hobbies include cutting open her wrists
In front of her broken mirror..

Red to blue

She doesn't see them working on her,
Just a darkness pressing in
They're trying so hard to bring her back,
Mais il est trop ****, c'est la fin

Light to dark

Her mothers crying, school was cancelled
There are people sobbing everywhere
They never worried, didn't see it coming,
Could have done more to show they care..

Dark to light

"There's 70% chance that she won't wake up
And if she does, she probably won't remember a thing"
This mans voice sounds very far off,
But she can hear someone close by singing..

New and old

Her hand is warm but her name is still lost
Someone's breathing is felt close by
"I miss you, please come back to us..
I promise this time I'll try!"

Old and new

She knows this voice, if not anything else
She clenches her hand around the warmth
I'm coming The girl thinks to herself,
*Have patience, I won't be long..

You're either lying to me
Or you're lying to her
Either way, you're a liar..
You can't just tell me I'm beautiful
Then distract me to say the same
**** thing to that nudist *****!
I understand she's been here longer than I,
And that you two may be close,
But you have a ******* girlfriend now
It's time to let someone go..

*Hurry or I might decide for you..

Though you've just gone,
It feels so long
Without you here
Everything's just so unclear

My head starts to spin
I'm starting to trip
Without you near
Everything's just so unclear

I'm not sure if I'm doing this right
For all I know I could look like a fool--
Hopping up, down, left, right!--
Dancing blindly in a chicken suit!

                     ~ ~ ~

So I cover my eyes
                                                   There's daisies and butterflies
And dream a happy scene
                                                             There's a quiet, bubbling stream
No longer am I here
                                                                              That reflects my image like a mirror
Instead I'm there
                                                                                                                             *One I can't bare

Like a cup of water, jolting me awake

It feels like you took a knife

And plunged it deep in my chest--

It's fine though.. I needed that reality check.

Girls are fragile creatures,
Or maybe it's just me?
Whichever it is, I find myself
A slave to insecurities.

I cannot speak nor defend myself,
Nor will I put up a fight.
I'm too afraid the ones I cherish
Will walk away-- fade into the night..

I'll stay as docile as a lamb,
And follow your very lead--
Even if I know where you take me,
Will only lead to my misery.

Also, like a lamb, I won't approach you,
Not at first. No, I'll run away.
You must be the one to lure me in,
Get closer and closer each passing day.

Until at last you've got me,
And there's no where for me to turn.
I trust you'll take me to a place of safety,
And not the place where I'll be burnt.

And so please remember,
Whether it's because I'm a girl, a lamb, or me,
That I'm never going to come to you,
When it's hard enough to just be.

I think I might have given you
The wrong impression
When I told you I like pain..

No one like to be abused
Yet you still treat it like a game.

And you always come out on top,
Whenever you successfully
Pin me down.

You bite me, pull my hair,
Wrap your hands around my throat
Until I choke out loud..

Please, just **** me already..
*It'd hurt less than this

To know
What you
Think about
When you're
Gone-- never