I am not me like what you want me to be
        I am here like you always wanted me to be
How could I ever be me, the me I want to be

I’m tired of you, tired of crying in the dark.
pretending at the park
                - watching people talk with voices that barks
I feared it will spark an awful reaction stark
So I build an ark -
Sailed away into far,
                      far - dream land
where prejudice & judgment is not in our hands
but in the all caring higher being's commands.

Then again reality is never like that,
So I hide, I stumble, and I fall
     into the gray solace of my patience
The higher being cares, yet you need choices
to stay strong - fight and survived
                        until blessings comes along
                                and heal the dying soulful song.

© 2013

You cannot break the broken, you can't live in the past, throw that memory away, you cannot let it stay, oh I wish I had the power to change every wasted hour, to knock down this growing tower under which I fearfully cower, in my ball of self regret.

             
                    I can remember:

                Tears that I have shed.

                 Lies that I have said.

                 Pain I have inflicted.

              Oh how I feel conflicted.


But know now this, for it is true, for all the things I can't undo, I'd never regret loving you.

I wow not to leave this earth a lonely *****,
Taunted by past lovers who label me as a witch?
Here I am today, keeping my eyes on the price,
I wow never again to be fed by more optimistic lies

From the Caribbean to the Central American shore
Every woman need to be love and to be adored
And not be willfully be subjected
to the life of a married man's *****

I have found solace in my poetry,
Therefore, I cannot commit adultery?

Living with shame, guilt and
asking God to forgive a sinner
Here I am today keeping my eyes on the price,
I just became an instant lucky winner:

Because of that little girl from across the Caribbean Sea
Who travels led her to the Central American shore
Once she said no more, she meant no more

A woman like me is often misunderstood.
Because of the path I have taken through the woods
I have listened numerous times to the blabbing brook
Who comments were rude, about the rich folks

But instead I observe from my homeless tent, the high achievers
I took it all in stride, while the mosquitoes chew on my legs
Women like me aren’t afraid to dream,
Neither are we bashful to wear
the wide rim hat at Easter time
Because all eyes would be on the winners (us)

I shall build my bathroom vanity to suit my person needs
        In a marble glossy white strip featuring tea leaves
Where the sunset would lift my morning moods
As I quietly sit on the toilet with the latest Bluetooth
  
I shall lie on my high pillow top bed
        And listen to the sound of the larks
While the wild baby monkey sits on the ledge
        Where tiny soldiers of marching ant crawl in the dark

I shall refreshed my house with Natural Aromatherapy Incense
        Just to keep evil away,
and in addition keeping the blessing in
While broods of Dominique hen cackling makes a loud annoying song

       In the year two thousand forty-two, I will represent
As for now, I am planning and waiting for my long awaited retirement

Feeling so worn out:

Sitting here in the dark
Afraid to go to the park

I might burn like a vampire
I feel like a wild wire

I'm alone in this cruel world
No one to hold on to make life easier in this twisted whorl

I'm scared I'll die alone
But really does it matter the demons say they will never leave me because their bad to the bone

Children grown and gone
I'm left all alone

I hate that the demons inside has taken over my body and soul
Coming in one by one threw the keyhole

I guess the demon stole the key that I had hidden
Where no one could see in the kitchen

The key holds my soul intact
Now I'm left with a key hole open for the demons to be let in whenever they want to attack

They come and go with out fear
While I lay here in tears

I wish I'd made another key
Then I could lock the door to my soul for keeps and be set free

The demons have captured my soul
Turning my soul into captivity in the black hole

I want to break free
But it's not in me

For this demon is to strong
I've lost all hope in beating this demon for now I'll play along

I'll lay here a bit longer to build up my strength
For maybe one day I'll beat this demon who lives with me day and night driving me insane

Freedom is……
Freedom is to go outside and play
And smell the joy of freedom.
Freedom is for girls to step outside
With their books and pen
To head of to the
World off learning
To prepare for their future life.
Freedom is to not see kids
wounded and with a gun.
Freedom is to see blacks and whites
Work together to make this
A better place.
Freedom is for us all to have a
Say.
Freedom is for all kids to be out
There playing.
Freedom is for kids to step out of work
Places and go to school.
Freedom is to be loved and cared for .