I was born up there,
between the stars and the strange,
between the silence and space.
I was born up there,
alone and afraid and
far from anything we call human.
I was born up there,
as an alien, an outsider, a foreigner,
a small gift sent from the cosmos.
I was born up there,
thrown down to Earth
with nothing but by innocence
to guide me through this
rock I call my home.

What strange power
the sunflowers have that,
once you walk among them,
your worries just fade away.
Like the countless sunflowers that
rise and fall,
we are born carefree
until our sun sets
one last time.

The most beautiful
people are those who don't know
that they're beautiful

10:25 AM
12/2/22

This pain will fade.
Pinch yourself once you
can feel again and
remember what it feels
to be human-
to be alive.

This love
like sunflowers
withers me and covers
me in the fallen petals
of what we
used to be.

I wonder if I
still haunt you like you haunt me-
a living nightmare

10:06 AM
5/2/22

There is nothing wrong
with taking baby steps.
Whether you walked instead of ran,
wrote a few sentences instead of pages,
or woke up a few minutes later.
It is better to have attempted than
to not have attempted at all.
Baby steps are okay.

No love is ever lost
no matter how wasted it may feel.
The love will return to you
in time, through healing,
in all sorts of ways.
Love cannot be measured-
it cannot be lost nor expended.  
Love surrounds us every day
in all of its abundance and awe.
Love is a miracle that will always pull us through
over and over again.
So never regret the love you give to anyone,
it will always return in its abundance
for you to share again and thus
the cycle of love
continues.

Self obsession
leads to a low opinion
and all that time and energy
could have been spent on
something else.
Get out of your head,
get out of your own way
and get out there.

I am still depressed,
I just don't think about it
as much anymore

11:01 PM
30/1/22

I don't know what to
say to you except that I
lost my heart to you

10:22 AM
29/1/22

Losing respect for
someone is worse than being
angry at someone

2:18 PM
27/1/22

I know you pretend
that I am the monster so
that you feel less guilty
about how you
treat me.

I find myself lost in the cosmos
from time to time.
Sometimes, I feel too far gone
to ever return to Earth
but that's okay,
the galaxies caress me in a
strange but splendid
silence.

You are the beauty of
a thousand sunflowers
and your smile makes the
sunrise in my chest.  
Your roots caress this soul
and intertwine your name
with every petal.

I live in an ocean
of your memories,
in shadows and the silence
at the bottom of your trenches.

You are a miracle!
Do you know how wonderful you are?
I celebrate it every day.
So always be yourself-
the miracle that you are.
Bless every second,
every heart, every day
with the miracle
that is you!

So much distance,
but not between our hearts.
So cold is the night,
but so warm are the memories
we share forever.

You may be far but
I keep you in the deepest
parts of this lone heart

6:09 PM
22/1/22

I do not
want this silence
to be the death of us.
I want to find a way back
to your laughter and song.

Nothing exists in
me that does not know your name-
you are all I know

4:31 PM
21/1/22

My soul still searches
for you from time to time.
Sometimes it finds you in the sunflowers
in all its beauty and aura
this world has been
blessed with.

Let my pour my soul
onto the page until
it overflows
and drowns me
in passion and pain.

Yesterday I
stared at the sunflowers
and lost myself in
the thought of you.

The sunflowers
whisper your name
as they spell it in the fields.
They gently sway
as the scent is carried in the wind
and I am once again reminded
of your love.

Perhaps I am not
alone as I thought I was-
perhaps they do care

4:15 PM
29/12/21

If I don't bury
myself in you, I'll bury
myself in poems

6:04 PM
20/1/22

Though this heart
still remembers our love,
your heart
has forgotten my name.

Dear Aria;
Merry Christmas;
I don't know how I got this far
without you but I
will keep going
for you.
I miss you.
I love you.

Won't you be my muse
at least for the night?
I promise to write you-
immortalize you onto the page.
Let your passion inspire me
until our next night,
and then the next.
Let this cycle of passion
never end.

Sylvie
is deceptive
to the eye and I
am left with nothing
but my imagination.

Last haiku of an
arduous year and I will
go out with a bang

12:53 PM
22/12/21

You were somebody
who had their good heart broken-
somebody like me

12:48 PM
22/12/21

They are not thinking
about you - do yourself a
favor - go to sleep

4:49 PM
20/12/21

The universe sings its secrets
over a symphony of stars above.
We answer back with a song of our own-
songs of love and hate,
of hope and memories.
Such soul we put into our songs
and yet they are but whispers
when sung over the
eternal song of the cosmos.

The truth is I can't
be away from you for long-
I miss your smile

6:55 PM
19/12/21

I keep our love alive by
Finding you in every sunflower.
It is in them that our love blossoms-
every word, every smile, every touch
held in every petal and
every seed.

I long for
these restless nights-
it's just me, the darkness
and the echoes of all
the other lonely
souls out there.

Your smile sends sunflowers
sprouting from my soul,
destroying the dark and
leaving light in your wake.

If I lived in a
vast gingerbread house, I would
have built it with you

11:40 PM
5/12/21

Whiskey-soaked words
written in ink as dark as
the days of this year-
Another love letter
to another year.

Our lives
are tapestries
woven with memories.

You take the dirt
of this life and
turn it into
sunflowers.

You placed your heart
upon my world and
a thousand sunflowers bloomed.

Every dawn,
I plant a sunflower in your name,
so that when dusk comes,
and a million sunflowers fill the fields,
our love will blossom
for years to come.

When I laugh, I cry,
a gentle reminder of how
I cannot bring moments of joy
to your attention.
To share with you the joy,
the love, the world,
would trump these things combined.
You are not here anymore,
to share what I share,
to love what I love,
to learn what I learn.
I wonder 'what if',
what could have been,
and where we would be now-
perhaps we would be sharing the joys
we experience in this parallel existence.
But you live your own moments of joy now,
and that alone is enough,
to bring me joy.

It does not
matter to me if this love
lasts one day or a lifetime,
you will last in my heart
forever.

The love in your heart
will always be stronger than
the hurt in your heart

11:50 PM
11/11/21

Most people will never know
the burdens you carry,
all the demons,
all the sleepless nights,
and all the love and loss along the way.
They will never know
the hidden strength it took you
to get out of bed each morning,
to put on a happy face,
and to do it all again.

Dear diary;
There are some days-
days like today-
where I have no place for this world.
Other days,
I feel like perhaps this world
has no place
for me.