Math is just
Infinitude
Of numbers
And equations
No one wants
And no one needs
Until the alien invasions
Leave its stringy theories
Tangled
In another quantum zone
As they incessantly perplex
And vex
My x equals unknown
And though I add,
Subtract,
And multiply,
Divide
I just can not abide
By geometric principles
Misshaping my
Befuddled mind
Despite the fact  
They tie together
Everything
We make believe
Is probable
To e mc
And make us see
All calculations
Possible

We could be lonely
Together
Sequestering
Close open wounds
Interminably festering
Leave the world lost
To its doomsday devices
No more counting costs
And considering prices
This rife with
The absence
Of wholeness
Won’t hurt us
Alluring
Distractions
Won’t fully  
Divert us  
Won’t turn us from
Shared
And more personal gains
Won’t be sunny skies
Every day
Chances it rains
On occasion
But we
Would just lay still
And listen
And lazily wake
To the morning dew glisten

Excuses
Excuses
Make me
A reclusive
Reduced to
Expecting the worst
Kind of mutant
Aberrant
Outlander
Unwelcome
Across
The whole globe
Have I strove
To belong
And get lost
Concomitantly
Constantly
Claim contradictory
Opposite views
At least two
Sides are needed
But always the one
Whose mere presence is fleeting
And then there is me
‘Bout to go unresponsive
For by
Dead of night
Silences
I am haunted

Like Custer
I’m flustered
By native invasions
Retaliations
On white savior
Salvations
Creation stories
Far less gory
Than mine
Shiny finer things I
Glorify
They decline
The divine to them is
What I chop down to spend
And what I comprehend
Merely land to be tended
They savagely fight to death
To defend it
No war declaration
Nor forced relocation
Or rampant contagion
Ensures subjugation
No integration
Or assimilation
Will ever equate them
As part of our nation
Expanding its greatness
From city to sea
So their choices are leave
Or accept the treaty
Bend the Wounded Knee
Come quietly
And relinquish
Their rain-dancing,
Flame-trancing
Visions
Extinguished
In favor of Manifest
Destiny’s best
Blessed Western
Exceptionalism’s
Excess
Steering clear
Of inferior
Cultures we fear
As we pave new frontiers
Atop their
Trails of Tears

All I know is
Nothing
Ever changes
Stays the same
We just revert
To we are worth it
We deserve
To own the Earth
And from rebirth
Temptations
Praying
We are thee
Foundation-laying
We aspire to eternity
Empires of modernity
Like spires in the skies
Re-deify
Its vast absurdity
Just blurring
Its distortion
Geospatial
Disproportion
Of its vaster still
Delusions
Of a prophet
Perpetuity,
Annuities
Reboot
And mass produce
Discontinuities
No please!
No please don’t shoot!

Love is like
A house of cards
A work of art
That falls apart

Can’t even boast
Of accomplishment’s ghost
When the sum
Of my parts
Washes up
On the coast
And I’ve been back and forth
All around
The rotation
Condemned,
Welcomed in
To an alien
Nation
To factor me into
The quantum equation
When numbers and value
Induces objection
But tethers and links
This hormonal connection
A balance
No palace
Could render
Distinct
If the masters we serve
All subservient
Sync
To the blink
We inhabit
This minuscule space
And the rate
We proceed
To extinction’s
Embrace

From rock bottom
Feeding
Leech feasting
Deceit
Has my vanity swelled
To where deities weep
And it watered the earth
With vitality tears
And then salted its worth
In a graveyard of fears
But availed no tomorrow
Unveiled in the fog
Just foreshadowed the ashes’
Aghast acrid smog
Some would laud
As if progress
Need darken the sky
As if flawed by design’s
A commodified lie
Yet another price tag
On a plastic bag
Flag
‘Till the last human
Life bullet
Empties the mag
And dragged into
A sooner
Or later
Creator
The maker you meet
Is a fake
Simulator

Republic imperial
Neo-Liberial
Free men enslaved
To a culture material
First world of money’s
God’s people, the chosen
The broken and mentally illness
Unspoken

Just another figment
Never coming back
Got myself
Into trouble
And couldn’t retract
The mistaken
Intrusion
Into the confusion
And from it
Still casts
A deceptive illusion
That all of this planning
This playing pretend
Comprehends
What the end
So prophetically
Pens
When it lends
But an ear
To the musing of strangers
Instead of defaulting
To surely endangers
My life
To take pity
To drown in the city
Still thinking its merits
Could Trump its decay
That the tyrants who built it
Would give it away

But none of them knew
Really knew
What I’m into
Went through
All the motions
Emotions
In rear view
In hindsight
Behind us
Was fun while it lasted
Though always outmatched
By the shadows I’ve casted

This much is true
I suppose
I conclude
I could live anywhere
I just want my own room
Little space
Private place
That I rest assured
Waits
Upon me getting home
And by night its embrace
Covers me in secured
And I wake to each day in bed
Feeling restored
When I’m bored
It preoccupies me,
Lets me hide
And in solitude
Into its shadows
Confide

She reaches out
From out the void
All morning I
Was a
Schizoid
An epileptic shock
Ecstatic
Down the 101
Wreak havoc
Magic mushroom mania,
Deranged
Unchain
My crania
My brain became
Mind of its own
My twitching, tweaking
Finger bones
Conducting orchestral
Performance
Thee outlander
Looms enormous
See the shadows
Flee before its
Superego
Muse catharsis
Sunny days
Immersed in darkness
Bladin’ ‘til
He flips his lid
An off the grid
Arachnid kid

Isolate me
Cut my tongue out
Throw away the key
I will still find the words to reason
With you people
If I need
To rule this town
And seize the crown
From heavy lies beheaded greed
And in its harems I will plant the seed
My progeny will be
Impurity’s new breed of legacy
Eternally they’d read
Appease my memory insatiable
As masses that I’d feed
And none would dare to challenge me
Chaotic orders I would lead
And all would heed
My epic poetry
Uniting spirits freed

The world would not so much as blink
If I left her
And let her continue her life
Giving journey
Through all of the stars
Learning just how to be
In their limelight no longer
Entirely free
Where I learned to be me
In the lover she chose  
To revolve and evolve
With the sand in my toes

How I long to watch it all go up in massive
Walls of flame
With you
To burn for you in anarchistic
Madness that you put me through
And set this hopeless, barren, wretched
Waste of space ablaze
And raze its fascist freedom fallacies
To ashen masses graves
And with my wildest temptations
Fade like self-detachment smoke
From charred remains of what remains
Of every promise that I broke
Of every note I ever wrote
Not worth their weight
In soot and smog
Throw on a log
And let me choke
On spoken worded spontaneity
Combusting in my lust
For flesh caressed in my possessive
Seething passion for your trust
And give it all to the inferno
To divine the splendid sun
Until my hubris wings ignite
Without you there to make it fun

It seems that November has finally reached India
Chilly tonight in the vacant moonlight
It is home that I see in my faint memory
Of the tiger to be which is all that I dream
Anymore for the haziness here doesn’t phase me
‘Cuz nothing’s amazing except when it’s wavy
And all that I am is now lazy with smog
But I’m grinding through time like an old, rusty cog
So in helping them grow like a gardener of minds
Cultivating the youth that is mine in decline
Far behind is it gone and where once it stood thus
Is pollution and poison and ash clouds of dust
Just gun shots exploding in satellite skies
Contact languages have become my contact highs
I can still take a sip of the foamy fizz phony
But with every drop I feel more like bologna
On some kind of journey, a quest to be best
To be better than beast and be least of all blessed

Drag this indolent
Listless existence
From bed
Gotta integrate with
What I hate
And I dread
And I said
Would be my
Calling
Falling on deaf ears
And leaving me hauling
A sack full of empty
Ambitions
And goals
Aspirations and dreams
Not worth sacks full of coal
Smoldering in the ash heap
Of youth disillusion
This trash heap adulthood
Disproven diffusion
Of two cultures’
Toxic pollutions
In union
When only mine
Keeps buying more
Of the ruins
And only theirs
Keeps bearing unfair
Disparity
Barely survivors
On dollars a day
Frailty pales by compare
To deadweight of dismay
And despair parodies
What these maladies
Do to me
Any joy left
Before death
Is excluding me
Nothing is new to me
Home is eluding me
Vexation
Interrogations
Confusing me
Losing my
Last of lost worlds
Of ideal
To the fasting on costs
Of living
All too real

This was all I wanted
All I hoped could be for me
But you just took it
And removed it
From my every reverie
And never see me
In this place again
Dispose of me like trash
And then you look me in the eye
And lie
With each pretentious slash
Across my face
Erase my stasis
Back to basics
I was making
Only more of
Complications
When you looked at me
Could feel the tension
Churning aggravations
All too late for me
To state my place
Embrace the wasted spaces
I have occupied too long
Belonging
Only to the void
And in the shadow
Of your banishment
My future is destroyed

Don’t remember
All details
Only how it ends
In fails
Have such profound
Epiphanies
More than a few
Deficiencies
Like some innate
Impulse
To pull
Over their eyes
The veil of wool

Still rising
And writhing
In bellies of beasts
Like a maggot-filled carcass,
In darkness
I feast
Beneath criminal underworlds,  
First come to serve
And just might
Get the labor force
Striking  
A nerve

Pick a cause,
Any cause
Then traduce it
Down to flaws
Not justified
To drive its message
Sloganeering
Its progressive
True intention
Buried in
The factory wreckage
Manufactured
Discontent,
Last vestige of
The dissident

Anchored
Drag me
Solace as ever
Serenity weeping
Cantankerous
Sadly
My life away sleeping

Repression
Of urge
To be free
Be incontinent,
Unreserved,
Unbridled
Me
But you don’t want to see it
Can’t understand
Anger
When I express pain
You assume
You’re in danger
A stranger
It’s made me
To put on the smile
Pretend
I intend
To be calm for awhile
That I do not seethe
With the need
To defile
The idols,
Injustice,
Hypocrisy,
Greed
And the temples
They’ve built
And the laws
They’ve decreed
So I leave it to you
To decide
What I do
Either storm out in rage
And let madness ensue
Or eschew
From another miscast
Make a scene
Featuring
My hostility’s
Daily routine

Yearn to be back
In the vast expanse
Questing
Adventure still beckons
But more second guessing
The longer I stay
In this place of stagnation
That keeps me at pay
Levels meager
But somewhat acceptable
More than I’d make
As a vagabond spectacle

Rather skeptical spectacle
Wouldn’t you say?
I’m a cool-headed
Sweltering hot
Winter day
Nothing special about me
Especially how
I fixate on the future
And live in the now
Just like everyone else
Play the hand I've been dealt
And I cheat only on
The true love I have felt
And expelled it from sight
No goodbye kiss
Goodnight
Just to spite myself
Loathing,
Have something to write
To relate to the rest
Of you awe-stricken
Critics,
Aesthetically-smitten,
Censorious cynics
Contestants in some sort of
Gimme more gimmicks
Olympics
And mimics of what talent’s
Really expressed
So obsessed
With the next
Biggest, best
And best-dressed
I digress,
Let it rest
Once again, who am I?
To be judging, begrudging,
Curmudgeonly so
Just one more
Unexceptional
Guy you don’t know

I know
I was there
Stranger place
Stranger time
The strange faces
I’ve seen
Estranged
No friend of mine
Not the least bit
Resemblance
Of love to lament
Nor a letter
To send
In my pen’s eloquence
To a worthy of waiting
For reiterating
The myriad ways
I could feel
Recreating
The meeting space
First laid my eyes
Vivified,
Vivid
Given to smitten
With my own demise
Never home
But to show her
A welcome befitting
The one to whom
Rest of my life
Is committing

Was there with the simple folk
Brokering peace
Liberal hubris incarnate
From Hellenic Greece
I was sent
To sow discord
And sword out the weak,
Like a lord over wheat
Grew inured to privation,
In filth I would eat
Not the least bit perturbed
By the state of police
For I stated my nature
With wraiths in my speech,
Cultivated my culture
Like vultures in heat
Infiltrated the ranks
Of the skanks there to tempt me
A sentry, preemptively,
Of feelings emptied

Before compromising,
Devising the next
Annexation prospects
And subjecting the rest
To exalt the apex
Because love is a war,
Just a game of conquest
And my argument formed
Of the West’s architects
In the bastion of sophistry
History’s greatest
Imperial city,
Glossary glossing me as
A Romantic
But no sense disputing
The paltry semantics,
Was just serving what
Time itself can’t resist,
The interest
Of my people’s

Utopian bliss

Look at us
Blurring the days
In these picture frames
Going our own
Separate ways
Onto sicker brains
Leaves me
Internally
Wretching
To contemplate
Predicated
On the seedbed of doubt
That what happens between us
Would wither without

I’m not playing my games anymore
I want more
For each industry
God
Is a titanic fraud
And not even
The stars in their skies
I applaud
For behind them
In waiting
Is Erebus
Gaping
The state
In its making
The home front  
Abroad

Haven’t had time
Been deprived
Of the kind
Of catharsis
My heart is
To trash bins consigned
It would just be impractical
Revenue squandered,
Instead I scheme how to make
Money more laundered
Go longer into
The approaching end
Game
And victorious
Finally
My throne to claim
Will be lonely as ever
A crown of dead weight
Barely ruling myself
In a court desolate

How could someone so far
Feel so close
Within reach
Like I’m already next to her
Down on the beach
And each day
Through destabilized life
Disarray
She is my equilibrium
Song that I play
The insightful awareness
Her fairness
Inherent
She sees me in ways
Not so often
Apparent
Unerring
Assessing
The depths of my mind
And repairing
Its faulty
Default
Out of time
For with her
There is more to be spent
In progressing,
Improving,
Correcting
Recursive transgression
A reason to stay
When I’d much rather leave
Broken dreams
She awakens
As yet to achieve
Not aggrieved,
Nor consigned
To no chance to attain
And as long as she’ll have me
With her
I remain

A reason to make my life
More than a failure
A letter per day
I just don’t have to mail her
Provides for enough time
To gather my thoughts
She’s the light in the dark
When I’m lonely and lost
And like frost
In the presence of heat
She flows through me
Infuses with my
Inner muse
And subdues me
Renews expiration
Of my daily dose
When I’m close to succumbing
To what I dread most
It’s this notion
She’s far more awoken,
Accomplished,
And down by the ocean
I’m drowning in conflict
Could she be
The years that remain
Or in vain
Will my wholehearted efforts
Eventually wane

If you think that it’s fated
Just go ‘head and state it
Just say that you stayed
All too long
In awaiting
For me to be
Some kind of man
You’d expect
To be there all the time
Not the mind who’d object
To the social injustice,
The coup d’etat bloodless
The ******* plays
Charlemagne
To the Dulles
Insurgencies crushed
By the hush of corruption
The lush ****** lands  
***** by corporate seduction
The merciless,
Unyielding
****** of production
Duplicitous,
Profligate
Lust of consumption
The numb to the slum
Mum’s the word battle won
And some
Before even
The Russian bear stirred
Others still
Before even
The King Leo purred
When the purge isn’t fiction
I urge the revision
Enlist in the war
Upon carbon emission
And see with the heat-seeker
Serpentine vision
But spit it unwritten,
Unscripted
If needed
Concede not an inch
Of this ethical Eden
And in the endgame
Existential
Checkmate
Is the movement I make
To still you
Captivate

I need only imagine her here
And she’s here
The bare bodies infusing
Her breath in my ear
An enticing, seductive
Exhale of expressing
The passion we feel
In releasing distressing
Concerns, we discern
One another’s intentions
Innocuous, mischievous
Flag-burning discontents
Freeing themselves
From the world
Abolitionists

Throw away forever
In favor of eternal
Lay to rest
The mortal soul
In deathless pages
Of this journal
Join me now
In disembarking
From compassion’s hesitance
Your empathy is not a weakness
But a conduit to this
Commiseration
Correlation
Know you feel me
Just afraid
To ever deign
To stand before me
And confess you feel the same

Sick of feeling
Myself wither
Spewed it from
My shriveled liver
Winter takes a heavy toll
And lachrymose
Is my old soul
For I was once
So young with her
But can’t go back
To how we were
In love
It seems
Can disappear
Or was it even
Ever there?
Apparent in
Some kind of sense
To me
Or else
Why these laments?
She mentioned
I might be depressed
Expressing now
The evidence
Presentiments
Of no known cure
But burials
Of premature
Relinquished will
To carry on
Endure no longer
Dead and gone

I don’t envy wealth
Redistribute its health
Comprehend its convenience
And savor the self
Long enough to destroy
At the end of fear
Void
Unemployed
Still deploying
My droids
Opioid
Like imperial fleets’
Archaeopteryx
Vision
All Rhodes of Colossus
Still bow in submission
To vanity’s
Villainy
Guilt
Contribution
The filth
Of free trade’s
Ethnic cleansing solution
The hack in the tax hiking
Ryker’s
Next door
We’re the youth who inherit
The engines of war
And will staff its advances
With hardwired sects
Of the next level
Technocrat’s
Spoiled execs
And we’ll show you
Who runs the world
Kids of the west

Hero in
My own crusade
Delusion
Egoist charade
A cognitively
Dissonance’s
Madness
Is my serenade
And music to my ears
The fear of failure
I won’t live to see
Now spreading rapidly
Beneath the surface
Cut it out of me

In bastions
Of Athens
In bathos
Unmentioned
We learned of my most
Civilizing
Pretension…
But miasma in the streets
The prices spike for gas and eats
And aisles full of the deserted
Still put ***** in the seats
Armada fleets
Exacting trade
By any force
Of commerce mightier
Than people it extorts
And it aborts its own last rites
To feed the richest
Their reports
And still under my aegis
My supremacy elitist
Representing staunch
And solely
No conviction
More egregious
Than my appetite
For sleight of hand
Subliminal starvation
My addiction to
The revenue’s
Casino reservation
To the totem
Status hierarchy
Token virtue’s
Price,
So tag the flag
Like body bags
And watch me wage a war
On rights

Wish this was you
I was texting to
Speaking to
Worst case scenarios
Silently
Seeping through
As the time passes
Between us amasses
A chasm so vast
When you still appear active
On apps we’re not using
For more than each other
Exclusively choosing
To see where it leads
Without squandering options
Though limiting mine
When I’m locked in these clock-ins
A coffin too early
To bury me in
If you go
And I’m left
Devastated again

It’s like time just elapses
I’m there in its passage
But absent
Somewhere unbeknownst
Is detachment
From make this a memory
Cherish serenity
Let it define
Reassign your identity
To the Book Facing
Erased
Interpersonal
Words left unsaid
Ever dread
Irreversible
Say your goodbyes
To the moment
And look
To the future
As if
You are now off the hook
For recalling
What made it
Indelible,
Sellable
Some crowning moment
Achievement
More credible

Already in us
The lifespan
Diminished
Dominion
Of domino theorists
Unfinished
With business abroad
And the world market
Over
Still pumping
And dumping
Their waste
Down our throat holes
And goes into veins
A cocktail
Of their chokeholds
And cold
As the pulse grows
More soullessly
Blood flows
The poisoned
Polluted
Precluded
Provision
Nutrition
Omission
Produces
Submission
And we are but lab rats
Experiments
Testing
Their chemical
Compounds
Of boundless
Ingesting

Send your soldiers
Send your sentries
Send your messengers of peace
Send your emissaries’
***** deepest secretive
Police
But leave the wars of men behind you
Let us learn each other’s ways
Let us gaze upon the mountains
Whilst conversing of the waves
Between the emanating mystery
Connecting us, dividing us
Uniting us as one
Beneath the power source we share
The mighty children of the sun

Not expectant,
Dependent,
Nor think she can mend this
Dysfunction
Defunct
Beating hunk of junk
Heart
She’s not looking for love
But still jumpstarts its parts,
Its ignition
Conditioned
To running on E
And then pumps it with
Once upon
Sincerity
Real with me,
Not a dream,
Not a fantasy
Fallacy
Balancing my
At war peace
Of mentality

Out of touch,
Out of tune,
Out of step with the times
Yet among a bit younger
Still often reminds
Me respect
Is upbringing
Integrity walks
And when court is in session
The leadership talks
Orchestrates the defense
Sets the pace of attack
And with sportsmanship
Runs any losses right back

Obsess over stressing less
Under duress
Like necrosis relentlessly
Rotting my flesh
When appearances
Have to impress
And express
The exact opposite
Of the unhappiness
Ugliness
Beast within
An abomination
Imperfection abounds
On his blemishing skin
Seldom seen
But still beauty  
Bemoans self-esteem
Low beholding
Its movie’s
Illusory dream