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  Mar 2015 Michael J Daisey Jr
Zoe Sue
So visual
Men
We sit them in front of TVs
Where barbie doll lookalikes
Singsong stereotypes
In search of the perfect man and family to cater to
The little girls watching think this to be fulfillment

I change to the news
And fake **** read the newest disaster
With a splash of celeb gossip after
Girls look to mirrors with shame
And I pray to love a blind man

Turn to politics
Where we find women
Like four leaf clovers
To pick out and scrutinize
Dehumanize
Objectify
She must've shown too much leg again
Because there's nothing of her words on the tabloids
Now young girls will only know power in their bodies
Wearing stolen ******* and a stolen smile
Stripping off her self respect with her dress

I live in a patriarchal society
That plays down feminism like a government scandal
I am oppressed
I am repressed
But this is not a woman problem
This is not a feminist problem
This is a societal problem
She sits on the bed and reads me
Old poetry
About ******, sadness, and loss
All synonyms
For the same affliction really
Dysfunction and despair
Captured in yellowed archival snapshots
Of a girl
With a penchant for surviving pain

Mortality leaps
From the prose as she reviews her life
In hellish imagery
A transmutation of spirit occurs
Within her
As she drifts through the years
On each page
Melancholy awareness for us both realizing
That it's all real

No one can take away the scars that
Every word cuts
No one can deny the inviolable fortitude
Required to document
The war embedded and entrenched on the front lines
Just old poetry
To me they resonate like a distant bell
Her sudden silence
Whispers that the dead still scream her name
HER
Cotton candy and barbed wire define my world
Pink painted princess walls by day become
A torture chamber by night as I am
Dragged to hell by the gnashing teeth of his demon
Sweet sunlight falls on my face in patterned squares
As I play with dolls on the cloudy carpet
In this bright fantasy Barbie can tell Ken NO!
And shut him away forever in the toy box
At night, in the gloom of reality Ken creeps from
Within the toy box of her mind with his filthy fingers
And beer breath. Light the color of
Sickness forces it's way into my supposed
Safe space as the shadow silently enters the doorway
That's my cue to feign sleep and run
Run so far away into my mind
But there is no escape from grotesque horrors which
Invade even the psyche. Every padded cubby becomes a
Sordid pit of persecution where a demon devours
The savory scraps of a little girl's soul
Every blissful oasis scorched
Into a treacherous wasteland of sewage
Even my dreams, once populated by roller skates
And dolphins, offer no respite from the
Demented dealings with demonic deities.
Blood and Pain and Scars and Lies and Hate
Are all the sandman has to deliver most nights
Underlying it all is Fear, fear of the truth
The truth being it will only end
In death. Mine or his
Buried in the walls of an abandoned house
You will find my morality, integrity and values
How can I be holy in a holocaust?
Shame has stripped away my humanity
And left me with volumes of despair
Shuttered into my wrinkled world*

Watching her smile at me from yellowed newsprint
And creased photographs in which everyone looks
The same, except for her. A haunting spirit which
Possesses even the cellulose and ink I clutch
In my trembling hands. Trophies of a brilliant life
That once snagged on a sharpened shard, began to
Unravel amidst Hope and Happiness and Honor
I flagellate myself with memories of walks and
Trips and fights. No amount of self-mortification
Is sufficient to satisfy the demons which torment
Me, nor the angels which mourn her. No penitence
Can relieve me of the yoke I'm burdened with of
Anger, Remorse, and Resentment. No purgatory
Sentence can properly prepare me for a pardon
Volumes of thought left behind in word and
Picture offer little solace to my fractured feelings
Left here to reassemble this life alone
This daunting task of overwhelming breadth
Leaves me with no answers, only the question
How can I complete the puzzle with a
Piece lost forever?
  Mar 2015 Michael J Daisey Jr
JDK
20
We sell condoms where I work,
****** arousal supplements,
and lotions.
And there's this twenty-year-old girl there
who controls all my emotions.

One look into her eyes;
two words that she says,
and suddenly I'm dying
right there inside my head.

Bury me six feet under.
This is more than I can stand.
I'm falling toward some dark abyss.
Pull me out of this quicksand.

(Maybe I should quit, or see a psychiatrist.)

I used to follow logic.
I used to be a reasonable man.
Now some twenty-year-old girl
holds my fate within her hands.

(She could **** me with the press of a button,
but she doesn't understand.)

Suicide crosses my mind too often.
Why should I die for this?
It's never bothered me before now.
I've never coveted a kiss.

I'm being ridiculous.
I just want it to be done.
I hate these ******* feelings.
I don't want to long for anyone.

(When the brain fights with the heart, it can tear a soul apart.)

There's this twenty-year-old girl at my job
who has recently found her sexuality,
and for reasons I can't fathom,
it will surely be the death of me.
Oh, to be young and in love . . .
Post ****** furnace boiling
The breeze kisses my flesh
She softly sings the sounds of bliss
Into my heaving chest
Unknown yet welcomed
The respite from heavy churning passion
Machines well oiled and primed
To deliver it's passengers through
Aeons in a few swift moments
She is my vessel and fellow traveler
Across the spiritual landscape
We have painted
Old canvas dusted and renewed
Under the Master's brush
His hand becomes mine becomes hers
Post ****** furnace boiling
New ideas, new vigor, new life
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