(Idea engendered from Lombok earthquake: Indonesia)

Nary a ***** of illumination pierces thru
thick cavernous rock solid chamber home
     to this crepuscular anchorite,
who spent untold countless chunks of time
holed up deep underground

     initially to escape deadly blight,
that afflicted vast swaths of
twenty first century
     long fostered civilization,
the post apocalyptic scattered remnants
forced into subterranean redoubts
reliant on stowed away tallow

uber wax to forge poorly guided
niggardly flickering burning candlelight
where quotidian ritual entails doth dight
this Jainist Joplin ascetic, who
     already donned the mantle,
     sans adjustment to darkened eyesight
imposing keen aural habituation

     to discern, and distinguish any fright
full scurrying, skittering,
     slithering, unseen presence
     triggering thine nostril to sneeze,
     which nasal (gesundheit) claxon
serves to scarify shadowy silhouetted height

giving infinitesimal pause,
     thence worry free insight
since my judicious jumbled
     juxtaposed metaphorical jacklight
philosophies, viz Jainism, Jesuit,
     and Judeo-Christian allows
     no cavil, indiscriminate killing,
nor **** sapien superiority

toward multitudinous life forms instilled
     into former existence as good Samson Knight,
now effectivel embedded,
     entombed, and interred
     within bowels of the Earth
hum canticle refrains
     softly enunciating such psalms
     to eternal night.

Truth be told said topic minimally embellished
rather, prattling youthful looking
baby booming geezer
precious time (yours), he doth bilk
(cue sinister mock-up halloween voice)

moost valuable intangible
outstripping fine spun golden silk,
yet coronavirus (COVID-19) quarantine
drives dingbat to whole new level
wits end where sonar helps sound out his ilk.

Think me swallowing, gulping, and asphyxiating
essential experiencing ill humor versus zest
suddenly impossible mission life and death quest
in short oxygen with air supply
depleted blame climate change
analogous to getting trachea

severely pelted, pinched, pressed
nevertheless, I limber twigs to build a nest
simultaneously (choking, gagging, and laughing)
appeasing the impractical joker within/without
lame impersonation suave debonair beau geste
and pardon following hyperbole expressed.

More onerous (ha) to parish priests
tendering, regarding and administering last rites
aforementioned "fake" dead serious claim,
one little known prevaricator doth attest
(nip pulling excess milk of human kindness)

faux (pas and mine late ma)
gaming altruism confessed
***** deeds done dirt cheap
hypothetically earning devout resuscitator
invoking divine intervention
upon impious hackneyed poetaster brownie points.

Now fur heal, aye really gotta
get get something off me chest
flagrant exaggerated golden opportunity analogous,
videre licet his achievements or service to country

warrants life experiences to entail electronic knighthood,
and/or his female counterpart secularly baptized
bitta bing bitta bang fiber optically blessed
communication courtesy poetry offers level best
modality as ye will subsequently attest.

Here, now be my (virtual and/ augmented) guest
to experience former don requisite paraphernalia
quite sophisticated electronics even average
Luddite would be impressed
i.e. headsets loaded with gyroscopes and other
sensors to track movements and similar

accouterments for latter lest
please take swig and/or slug at my behest,
yours truly boasts nutritious 100% vegan zest,
oh... afterwards use greensleeve (mine), I jest
to wipe tell tale residue (i.e. milk mustache)
off your mug that gulped
farce syrup passing electric kool aid acid taste test.

Earlier today (April 18th, 2020)
a novel notion came into mine pate
to craft poem regarding titled subject
i.e. fyi Google Califia Farms
satisfactorily to investigate

or visit https://www.califiafarms.com/ to satiate
curiosity a boot plant based healthy drink to locate
nearest purveyor, an
immediate convert ye will become
preaching the gospel gushing enthusiasm will not abate
subsequently yours truly
able, eager, ready and willing to debate.

Dante's Inferno chokes breathable air
fiery flames fuel
     state of emergency
     president did declare
despite his disclaimer global warming
     "FAKE," no matter glare
ring obvious indisputable proof, nonetheless,
     the commander in chief

     blatantly doth jeer
and doubles down ‘bad
     environmental laws’ mare
reed with water
     shortage explains conflagration,
     oh...,and while he takes
     a knee in prayer
(re: home companion fashion)

     Thee Oaf blithely vouchsafes
     courtesy, sans colorful swear
words plus (purportedly,
     unbeknownst to him
     marijuana laced powder milk biscuits
     giving him courage - er chutzpah
     as if he needed any) to veer
way off script of late spluttering, spouting,

     and even spewing outrageous claims
     that (YES) extraterrestrials rank as chief
     villainous figures as
     nonpareil arsonists this year.
This Lake Woe
     begone Wharton warrior
     no stranger to attribute blame,
where unidentified flying objects

     affected intergalactic collusion
(hare brained scheme hatched,
     engineered, and brooded
     while holed away in his
     Trump Taj Mahal) from
     outer limits of
     twilight zone) fair game,
not averse to accuse

     Norwegian bachelor farmers
     falsely, and even
     Grimm folklore characters,
     not outrageous to name,
he will continue to repeat falsehoods,
     and later subsequently quote
    himself without shame!

(cuz ma life iz such a drag...
this **** kin “FAKE” hemp  
pyre aye roll out to you dear reader).

As a double jointed mathematical abbot
and amateur chemist
   specializing in cannabinoids
   my favorite delta-9-tetra
   hydrocannabinol (THC),

   isolated and synthesized in 1964
weeding thru bathroom rag
   while athwart the *****
   i.e. measuring adequate perforated
   square roto root er, sans
   regular toilet tissue paper
   prior to completing important

   private business matter
   on the sacred porcelain chamber ***
Mary Jane made a token appearance,
   and boy she looked smoke kin hot
asking if I wanna marry (Jane) her attired
   in drag at a joint where Billy ****  

   banged on by the hands of
   a phenomenal drummer
   taut as a hemp knot
with music in his blood
   while blowing  fractal rings – holy Scott
the immediate utterance,

   and rather creative bon mot
found me stock still like stone wall Jackson,
   who unfortunately got deprived a hit,
   nonetheless got shot
unwittingly by his own (confederate troops),
   whose demise an awful blot

per southern cause during
   the Civil War and if anachronism
   to receive medicinal aide available
   instead of primitive treatment he got
(as well other wounded soldiers
   of misfortune on the battlefield),

   whose faith the any almighty power
   could do little to save their roach invested lot
yet availing my imagination
   to twist time like that Mobius strip
mortally wounded rebels and Yankees
   free from facing death on a cot
might be successful hemp

   entrepreneurs cultivating a little spot
of land hemp would outstrip cotton
   as king as export to trot
orange you glad I avoided
   the analogy with a kumquat?

Squarely conscientious, I unwittingly
sanction selfhood acutely triangulate
courtesy webbed geometry jeopardize,
galvanize pluck nudging contrived arc,
virtually courting temptation aware,

sans impetuousness compromises an
anonymous commingling, nonetheless
electronic fraternization enthralls mine
plucky chutzpah possibility intrigues
yours truly sporting impish grinning

smile across world wide web unsure
quasi cryptic communication decrypted
maybe imperfectly interpreting message
this enamored disembodied spirit doth
chance circling foursquare kibitizing

downplaying grand illusion spontaneity
gist ripples thru this human entity while
comfortably cushioned buffered against
disappointment accepting outcome - par
for the course amidst cyber spatial gulf

nothing ventured brings disappointment
more often than not, this solitary fellow,
a beetle browed fool on the hill smarting
over...he ne'er gathered rosebuds fruitless
ruing foregone opportunities, hence tho'

cocooned against adverse outcome revel
at fleeting giddiness affixing envisioned
smile upon unknown reader, or perchance
another veritable stranger, cuz amiability
need not be sole providence aimed at one
select web surfer, but extended warm free

greeting permissible allow one imperfect
troubadour to sprinkle pleasantries to any
person, whose scrolling intersects with my
genuine not "FAKE" aery mission to offer
abiding friendship e'en if limited to realm
of harmonized synthesized online reality.

(alternately titled: jump starter for clunky, *****,
quirky, xyz mechanic wanted in tow tow -
chassis what I mean?)

As the proud graduated
honorably rolled 2009 Hyundai
Sonata vehicular property
belonging to a mister
and missus Matthew Harris
(fifty shades of gray

if that makes any difference),
I experience nervous
rack and pinion quaking
shimmying, whining, and zipping
also twittering, shuttering,
linkedin kickstarting powertrain

even before chugging,
huffing, puffing, spewing...
like magic dragon along boulevard
of broken automotive debris
regarding upcoming
emission/inspection

due before stroke of midnight
August 31st, 2019
last year this time...
aye yie yie...
oil my pan, a major overhaul
comprising driver side suspension

engendered shock,
I...could not absorb
even now, yours truly strut er ers...,
and doth recoil scary undertaking
smattering of months thereafter,
(I wheely cannot engine ear

recalling exact amount of time)
what in the name of... car nation...
then... driver side rear brake assembly
required replacement
giving said owners run off
Golden Gate Bridge for their

newfound moneyless rendered situation
(ex post facto new battery got installed)
sorry to zap at greased lightning speed
and (mane lee) take lion's share
of social security electronic deposit,
(what with fuel tank filler ups,

and insurance - no matter
Nationwide always on my side)
understandable decent folks
would prefer to steer me
off cliff side, but
my dear friend SEPTA

doth not cam into hinterland
namely Schwenksville, Pennsylvania,
thus imposing prohibitive dollars
tooling them around
mainly medical appointments,
cuz at ten plus years old,

and odometer clicking away...
mechanical malfunction,
could diesel lee, axle dent tully
risk life and limb,
thus park my exhausted words
this fellow gas guzzling,

motoring, rotating tire
screeching hot rods...
ole clunker auto know,
but hates tappet cob Bosch,
and get cha piston off...,
but tread carefully,
and curry big stick shift.

In steed of ye
     mounting your stock
key high horse,
     perhaps named Rock
Key, and head off...lock

stock and barrel,
     who knows where,
     now lemme seat chew wait
ma self, and quickly knock
out quick mention about

     hour (meaning everybody
     within the wide world),
     and their webbed
     warp and woof weave
courtesy of Father Time

analogously to a ****
key hunkering down
     aiming tubby first
     crossing finish line
     at races, afterwards celebrate

     with social feted outing, while
     scheduling proctologist appointment,
et cetera, sans squeezing
     late radio talk ad hoc
meeting, an

     extemporaneous yet timely
     lesson indirectly related
to bird *******, i.e. migrating
     fast as Glock
     pistol can shoot, essentially

sound (garden) resembling
     joyus honking flock
of seagulls heading
Southside Johnny
     and Asbury Jukes,

     and on Tortoise -
     to sea dock
side of the moon
     Pink Floyd attired as Teenage
     Mutant Ninja Turtle,
    
     whose schedule Nsync
     with YES men hosting
     showtime merely minutes away...
remember ring that char existence
     enslaved to thee a bomb

     been nibble atomic clock,
which device uses an electron
transition frequency went
sallying forth in
     the microwave tent,

experiencing optical radiation pent
up ether, or ultra
     violet region meant
for electromagnetic fervent
active spectrum, or Palestra event

of atoms comprising
     Adam and the Ants
     (as well all other matter)
     linkedin to frequency standard for
     timekeeping Strunk and White
     element of style.

Pennilessness shadows black
unemployment endless track
rails tie-er less lee when dumbly staring
overdrawn account issues
   another clattering smack.

Income pleat undergraduate degree
contributed to the role of a sporadic employee
time to acquire handy dandy blues clues key
lost within vacillating undermining spree.

Mental state can be a precarious widget-like thing
directly at the whim of financial sliding swing
self-destruction demonic ring
courtesy of pauperism
delivers the destructive poisoned scorpion sting.

Immortal force of please hear my cry
provide support while
   under the sheltering sky
steady (just out of reach)
   sought income bolster up high

mirage vision brings transient delight
to this great (former
Civil War Yankee) supreme guy.

If no breakthrough I do not foresee
charity not for profit (but only prophet) I will bee
and this blurb carved outside my cave-like hovel
many moons and break of the day find me

imploring existential vagaries this baby boomer
sans middle-aged man who hankers to be free
thus though aye to be a schnorrer

who scrounges parking lots for scattered change
yet...decries blubbering the beggar's credo
write out a check and mail to me.

Philanthropic persons
   may rightfully balk and get irate
at such brazen plea to squelch
   ma pecuniary financial state

yet where the crossroads of mine future
most likely crop up which
would cause far a tete a tete
meanwhile, stoicism bids me wait...

For Godot, Curly, Shemp, or Moe
the stand-in for a Stool Pigeon
or even an odd antagonist
   or protagonist dreamt
   by Edgar Allan Poe.

(even when iron not hot, but rather cold as ice)

Yours truly a day late dollar short
dollars to donuts bonafide klutz
living ****** mint procreative
seminal squirt biological reproduction,
could never conceive to abort
despite countless occasions,

I blithely admit characteristics
linkedin with being a putz
going off rails as a one man train wreck
mine impossible mission to avoid
NOT running amok imagine
bull in a china shop.

Pigeon toed, I trip over me own little feet
size nine shoe small size for grown man
leaving utter disaster in his wake
synonymous when havoc strikes
chaos theory alive and well
ensues when I walk about
and dare take even one baby step.

Ever since adept with ability to crawl,
I ofttimes tumbled down the stairs,
but never did shed tears nor bawl
e'en when taking nosedive head first did fall
out the hatch of airplane

splattered, plastered, and matted
think suddenly feeling comfortably numb
joist another brick in wall
nevertheless acquiring stunt man role
paid big bucks

as **** sapien disguised as Sasquatch
(cause unkempt harried styled hair)
more times than I can remember
fell to Earth minus parachute,
which hoop fully explains

the incomprehensible drawl
earnestly and frankly harkening language
once extant within Gaul
which reverberated inside hall
of mountain (lionized) king.

Prior to any madcap misadventure
yours truly envisions his clumsiness
plays out within my third eye blind
hilarious scenario unfolds in slow motion
whereby accidental flick of wrist,
barely brushes up against
flimsy clothes rack

(the original motive begetting poem)
knee **** involuntary reaction,
kicking obstacle clear across Compton
generating comical feedback loop
impossible mission to stop
blockchain of fateful bitcoin events.

Living amidst (amongst) disarray
courtesy the missus, whose domestic habits
never merit housekeeping seal of approval
twenty four/seven pose
a hazard to mine existence.

a tsunami catapulted cruising skiff
skyward landing with quiet thud
across undulating infinite granular waves
formerly solid state rocks and minerals

optimism vibrant upon initial unforeseen
crash asper for test dummies
foundered as undertow fostered diminishing hope
initial faith for survival quickly ebbed

nsync with retreating tidal wave
pessimism dreamt fantastical holograms
farther from beached berth
immediately transformed into quicksand,

while off in the distance
a glimmering chimera
(the first of many) appeared
amidst the desert sands one mirage

after another falsely broken promise
buoyed drained salvation
quick decision decreed each man for himself
thus disseminating banded bruited "brothers"

condemnation, damnation, excoriation, fulmination
hurled at cosmic creator thwarting intercession
dehydration, exhaustion, ingratiation, jubilation
foretold merciless portentous demise

witheringly desiccating lovely bones of mine
no doubt raw elements of nature wrought
fate worse than death sans, cabin "mates"
lost among expanse of whittled quartz

across chronometer measuring millions of years
now subjecting one measly mortal i.e. me
to cruel unforgiving, unrelenting,
unwelcoming petty coated junction

blistering hot wind obliterated
fellow travelers convoy deeply
within diabolical dunes
eternally erased doom

awaited for 21st century explorers
to discover scattered wreckage
both beast of burden, outrigged contrivance
and starry trekkers, who vanished without a trace

a handful of scrappy rapscallion existences
blotted (like ink, oil, or other liquid sponged),
where subsequent seasons
of wicked bewitched slow torture

akin to being raked over hot coals
exception made for this interminable sufferer
at the whim of sadistic
persona non grata evil spirit

n'er obliterating diehard survivor instinct
a foreigner to yours truly
but atavistic primitive fight or flight
witnessed relieved whence absently blinking

this life married to indiscriminate
clamped, harried, styled devilishness
evaporated in thin air
upon tentatively opening myopic brown eyes
horror, twas boot a dream.

i yam as peaceful as rolling rock
harmless toward even those who mocks
my appearance n follicular 50 plus shades of gray locks.

oye feel as important like first, second, third, fourth...banana
thus...please i yam gonna
try to forge a lifelong jimmy john james ah dah bond

   cuz an intuitive sense, u r like manna
thus ambition spurs me to wanna
do whatever in my pow wah.

aural, banal, carnal, feral, gonadal, hormonal...urges difficult to allay
to keep ***** drive at bay
on each and every single day
seriously thought to auction myself on eBay
this mwm living a life described as fey
though sunny skies, my libido reigns gray
would be thrilled to take a roll and romp within thee hay
and wonder if i could call you by the pet uni-****** name jai
in thee vernacular what most healthy guys endeavor to as a lay
which reply from yea hopefully the opposite of any sin a nim of nay
would that be okay
by the quay
today
or some night this feral primate could *** your way?

a pent up urge to ****** one or both wonderful womanly ****
introducing ye to mine little **** a doodle christened pete
found a quixotic whim to meet thru classified
   which offers a common way to meet
imagining the outcome of such of said delectable feat
but fearing the odds t'would be stacked way to high to generate beat.

yet if more than praise for citing me poetic talent doth well
more libidinal longings this humble not so long fellow could tell
and just maybe coax ye to bear thine chest for e'en just a spell
forsooth these to behold an apt comparison to a flesh born
   physiognomy portrayal of mountains tipped with *******
   and that balm in the cleavage of a wondrous dell.

this germane guy would be thrilled  
to give peaceful friendship or more
a chance desiring proper strokes o affection  
helping peppy perform his special dance
revealing moi fleshy stubby lance
thence allowing this slender guy
to remove his pantswhich scenario creates
a favorable pumping stanceaffecting you with a positive trance.

so...if drawn toward a boyish male  
of two score plus seventeen years of agewhose wardrobe oddly enough  
typically favor the color beige
with zebra like patriotic red, white and deep blue stripes  
evoking analogy of being housed like a foo fighting rat
in a cagethan respond to this introspective sagewhose will offer himself  
with negotiable legal - no fallacy - butta precious seminal wage.
so lettuce go fur zee gusto while i yam still able to trot
now, your noggin probably thoroughly mixed up
   and in your mind and even out loud, ja utter more'n !@#$ what!
  
pseudo nom de plume - scott matthews
tracfone ye kin only text
or email your carnal ville fantasy tuff flex.

this chap haint lawless nor "baad"
do not in the least presume this cyber surfer 2b a cad
in many ways, this nada so content married mister mom
   feels akin to being a single dad
who as a nonestablishmentarian shies away from any latest fad
would jump sky high leaping tall buildings
   in one bound and thus be extremely glad
to end laughably, hardly, and desultory marriage
   (with moi deux teenage lasses in tow)
   to find me own pad
and mebbe me girls would be sad
p'raps joost a tad.

a genuine passion arises within my sensitive real brave heart
which ***** purchased - on clearance - at wall mart
t'would very much like e'en an online friendship to start
thus ask ye to bee comb moi special sweet ****.

please lettuce explore ****** fun with this awesome cool dude
you cannot go wrong dear lass per beak
   combing a special "friend" toward this poet
   who tries his mother ******* best rarely to sprechen crude
and man can offer his attitude.

so...unsure if a small *** of cash persuade or tempt you
   to takes this ole (yet boyish looking) disgruntled marred buck  
visa vis discover if we both cluck
this little pecker of a beak
   would love to nibble imitating a duck
cuz in a nutshell dis mwm does really
   does wanna (pardon moi french) ****
please be the one to break this dry spell, and bring me luck
to affect ****** chords of ecstasy to pluck
argh  this dang marriage o moin does absolutely ****
driving into ye air lil parking lot my smallish truck.

anyway, i wanna so mooch touch
   n taste dem re: ***** lick kin naughty bits
especially the ones referred to as *****
where male genitalia near perfectly fits
rubbery and a bit tangy yet still tasty as buttered grits
from dis *** **** u late ted electrons
   dat go haywire with random hits
wetter day be big or little like pits
this guy alias raised on buckwheat and grits
wants to hit dat ****** n dislikes doze who quits
mail me a note - ideally a naked photo with ***, ***** and ****
and hoops to offer his gunny sack full of wisdom and wits.

this chap doth betcha ye got ample allure
n yar companionship would nada be ya bore
though getting 2 know someone = an arduously pleasant chore
especially if invited in2 their door
without getting stuck like eeyore
for...
so...If receptive 4 whatever fir fun galore
respond to the Magic Man of words nada bon joe v jure
TRACFONE NUMBER = 215--370--8929 to lure
my ear a table desires more
or
act our fantasies tum make a home run, touchdown or score.

Circa Holy Roman Empire
between ninth
and thirteenth century
after common era

(approximately 800 AD and 1200 AD)
benchmark year 780 bracketed
Benedictine monks
of Corbie Abbey
devised cheeky guttural lingual rapartee

vis a vis European
calligraphic standard script inked lined
writ via extant Irish and English monastic
members nsync
strong influence of Irish literati

eased communication
popular Latin cognoscenti
common lingua franca
spawned  Carolingian Renaissance

Codices, pagan and Christian text
plus educational material
written viz Carolingian minuscule  
Emperor Charlemagne issued prescription

(hence named Carolingian)
boosted unified modus operandi
he advocated learning,
though somewhat illiterate

recognized value of education
predicated on singular
codified regional alphabet,
the then webbed wide world

linkedin, sans uniform symbolic shapes
uncontested salient advantage
offered up ease to master
clear distinct explicit letter formation

simple logic boosted
rapidly transmitted standardization,
especially with exceptional legible
readable characteristic

adequate spaces between words
Merovingian "chancery hand"
still reserved to draft traditional charters
Gothic and Anglo Saxon

favored traditional local script
as opposed to Latin
learning latter involved less tricked out
embellished flourishes

or interconnected strokes
drawn by a scribe
allowing, enabling, and providing
greater popularity to teach masses,

latent etymological nuances apparent
centuries following implementation  
quasi initial Carolingian letters
steadfast, where Carolingian

influence moats strong
adopted local stylistic signature flavor
divergence woke since proliferation
stoking diffuse prospects

decreeing entrenched footing,
where auspices boded prescient
until groundswell didst surcease
sub limb mated into modern patois.

Joyous rapture awoke sleeping animalistic giant:
carnal, feral, gonadal horniness in deed, when defiant

this primate crossed figurative
   paths with a stunning woman
older than a spring chicken freed
   via ma hen nah paws van
jealous (of casual suitors),
when I figuratively crossed urban
paths with delectable dame.

   This hedonistic mwm veritable tan
tin nab buell lay shun caged in rein
   mister experienced euphoric San
ta Claus gifted encounter merely
   approached a female stranger ran
king as absolutely beautiful asper
   Samson recounted Delilah, Qan

i.e. qualification assurance notification
   within this poetic blurb. Pan
dum money yum (does not come close)
   upon entering a nan
oh meter times a gazillion equals
   scope of super sized ALDI's, every man
woman, and child could be housed.

   This supermarket (anchored lan
did at one end of a string of bungle
   low slung businesses conveniently kan
struck ted adjacent to popular stores,
   which aligned buildings a haven come Jan
ewe weary, these newly constructed
   bricks and mortal portals along Ian

eyesed, seen as primary corridor
   i.e. Ridge Pike (linkedin with Han
sill and Gretel recently rural gingerbread
   cookie cutter communities). Gan
a mead by Jove, said affordably priced
   food store noticed as a fan
tass tick location along the driver side
   heading towards Limerick, ean
at dark hours within Pennsylvania).

   This patron (me) of aforementioned Dan
dee nofrills modestly priced franchise
   espied an available card soon after Can
Nudda entered this outsize place
   to buy groceries. Another shopper (a bon ban
Joe plucky strung string apetite
   slip sans attractive gracefully aged gal) anan

entered said market seconds later,
   and dye motioned (to her) as she sigh
lent lee reached same idle sturdy cart,
   which ordinarily requires a quarter to pry
loose from a train of chained property.
   I unthinkingly, reflexively, and blithely my
deferred politesse she took possession of cart.

   Within instantaneous affirmation je
nais sais quais consent given for her
   to load groceries in sought after cart, this guy
noir got fast impression immediately formed,
   whereby visually this chic chica to die
for spurred enticement as very pleasing
   Halloween eye candy, hence desirable allie

madamoiselle in question totally tubularly
   unaware of lovelorn spate. Minutes before
tardy reaction (and perfect comeback
   ex post facto) momentarily preoccupied chore
viz reviewing mental check list, my intent
   to act with courage and acknowledge a door
quick to close.  Her (unbeknownst)
   attractiveness to me. Upon inadvertently
   froze me like Eeyore

glancing at thee beautiful doll female human,
   an aggregate of positivity arose. That four
tut hood toward slender youthful looking chica
   figuratively took my breath away. She galore
re: us lee ranked topnotch on my register
   of aesthetic delight. Thus, while this jackfrosted ****
frosted flake ambled up and down aisles,
   an aim sought to relay pleasant physiology while Igor
Stravinsky – Flight of the Bumblebee buzz

   within every square inch of my anatomy bon jour
quivered with cockiness, covetousness,
   and craveness without resorting to Dumble Da lore
for guidance, hence indecorous, impetuous,
   or idolatrousness loosed rampant as more
consideration asper jimmying bold, daring do
   hounded (Lo and Behold) luck did not ig nor.
A nod in answer to prayer ready set terrific
   wonderful chance arose pondering how to mine ore

and coax a major outcome addressing this ambition,
   which unceasingly pecked, piqued, dirt poor
**** lee  pricked thy noggin about sudden revelation
   presence pretty lady Upon quor
tar number of minutes passed,
   whereat her increasing proximity, an unflagging score
begging akin to patriotic duty and appeasement
   sans uttering a compliment recognized roar
ring optimal (once in a solar eclipse) chance
   to corral, field, and invoke latent obligation that tore
per regaling unknown xwoman a dollop gratutity.
   Whether embarassment ensued possibly war
temporarily shunted aside, cuz if no propensity
   to risk testing cab age comfort zones of yore

if awesome stroke ignored, a disappointment
   toward self would manifest irking conscience.
For the rest of eternity. So without missing
a beat (and reckoning with nary a spare off fence
guess not to turnip ma nose), a apple lick able amicus
   brief pickle this complimentary gents
dare devilishly egged, finessed, gambit regarding
   how gorgeous (a veritable stranger) kents
humed and appealed to me, whence squashing
   regret at a costly emotional ex pence.

after pros and cons discussed
     with six grade speech pathologist, she weighed
in favor, to launch stealth offensive
     spring time surprise raid,

which faux analogous military show of force,
     no picnic nor hit parade
though undeniably,
     unequivocally, and unquestionably

     earned the unflagging necessary
     parental consent okayed,
whose unconditional love for welfare
     of this sundered son obvious

     nasal twang genetic mutation made
constituting said congenital defect
     identified as sub
     mucous cleft palate, which laid
waste thine boyhood psyche 

     teased, thwacked, and 
     tormented, skewered, and frayed,
which exacerbated introverted 
     strongly dominant behavioral trait, 
     thus hermetically sealed convenient 
     modus operandi spelled E+V+A+D+E

the madding crowd at all costs,
     (hence quickly felt lured 
     to an emotional brink)
thus from the fountain of death, 

     I wanted to drink
versus putting up my measly 
     (not so hazardous) dukes 
     knocking out cold, every rat fink

though this scaredy pants chose passivity 
     from classmates, a tacit ticket to yawl
to deliver sucker punches 
     (as iz the wont of mean kids), 

     and evoking evoking a 
     not so shabby (nee convincing) 
     impression of a stone wall
albeit rather small

since diminutive slight build another up pall
ling (albeit) physical characteristic suffering offal
bouts of bullying, and sought refuge 
     imagining dragons 
     to beat up punks and maul

every grimacing, leering, questing
monster lurking to brandish brass knuckles 
    upon turning down this, that, 
     or another dimly lit hall 

in part, cuz zam ma pinched 
     onrush of air thru my button nose, a drawl
dangling as perfect prime call
ling card, when only within pendulum 
     swinging in pit of tummy 
     did a horrendous brawl
ensue, yet this haint all

aye wanna write, originally to explain savior 
     in the guise of speech pathologist's aid
introduced tummy upon entering sixth grade
whose intervention laid  

precedent to exercise muscles 
     along inner neck, and played
what appeared as senseless games, 
     plus navigating, regulating, 

     and vocalizing wade
ding thru one book after another 
     while tape recorder thru brickbats un afraid.

an ambivalent flashback now occurs 
     upon forcing mine ears to hear voice
of yours truly, and tis not arrogance, 
     haughtiness, nor orneriness, but aye rejoice 
perfecting good riddance to figurative 
     thorn in muss hide by choice.

Aye did not heed the maxim careful
     what you wish for,
     cuz now adversity not abate
perhaps helpful for thee reader

     if this bard ****
     did apprise present woe
     by turning time machine backdate
asper how the fickle finger

     of thine existence didst create,
a more agonizing situation discerning
     scythe leant presaging grim reaper date
now welcomed with

     opened arms to extricate
fools paradise by twist,
     and shout of cruel fate
e'en locked up in a damp, dank,

     and dark dungeon more grate
full, than full blown wraith zing hate
now lemme summarize
     woe of this ingrate

where reprieve of death,
     would be to good for me to jubilate
perhaps immolation, thence
     at the stake burnt offerings

     presented to the
     "FAKE" trumpeting khanate
hence complete annihilation
     the only way to liberate

a guilty conscious weighted down
     by Sisyphean sized mill stones
now whit tis time mate
to acknowledge, and try to numerate

whereat one issue found me
     reneging and being obdurate
on reimbursing me youngest daughter,
     who could not pontificate

why she needed to fork
     over monies in relation
     to overpayment re
     guarding social security,
     essentially incumbent on me

     on me eek quate
ting to a sizable tidy sum,
     finding yours truly i rate
yet refund check she sent

     over a year ago, and spate
of anger (born by eldest lass)
     unforgivable egregious stonewalling
     do to procrastination trait

this papa (rightfully my responsibility)
     objects to bearing
     brunt of arithmetical error
plus my own meager

     very limited fiduciary reserves
     induces anxiety to undulate
thus becoming fancy free
     and foot loose bachelor

appears as emotionally
     cannibalistic (ready
     to jump off a bridge)
     to shuck off this unbearable weight.

Peachy keen verboten maiden *******
USA plum ova ripe fruit
inevitably, inimitably, invariably,...
whets whistle pubescent magic flute
impossible mission to rein with absolute
zero ***** esse to temper acute

raging testosterone, I attribute
overbearing animal urge doth constitute
difficult surge protector
resultantly, subsequently, untimely...
not inconceivable teenage
parenthood does contribute

overwhelming responsibility
adds complex twist making destitute
expense regarding sudden newlife
analogous how simple surface
Möbius strip doth render convolute
frivolous shenanigans offer pointless dispute

buck haws fawn hook caisson
akin to holding back the tide, disrepute
fallout, whereby accountability ideally
one must distribute
between minors, who risked major shock
generally ill prepared to handle

grasping hot wire strong
enough to electrocute
call of the wild heedless,
when in throes to execute
human reproduction hard rock
tune somber sober air thenceforth

issues out magic flute
after drenching, dribbling, drooling
residual expulsions 'pon hirsute
tuft possibly engendering hyperacute
revulsion basically atavistic
copulation recalls imbrute

tell tale swollen belly of gal doth impute
culling instinctual maternal institute
fancy free footloose
promiscuity makes involute
sober reality moot point,
whether one or both kids feel irresolute
adding insult to injury

mama's papa's none to happy
swiftly kickstarts  harried styled jackboot
careful pops not to damage unborn
vital umbilical cord taut as jute
strong enough to harness malamute
and/or team of huskies in conjunction with

wild horses or domesticated
breeds Equus caballus
couldn't drag away even for one minute
infinitesimal speck - trim
unmistakable to misattribute,

how basic multiplication
one cannot miscompute,
and product will upend and misroute
grandiose plans leaving
puppy love mute.

Been making, (sans
     daily) regular appearance
in the news oval
     hate gambling arrogance
vis a vis spewing,
     shouting, and scathing rabidly
     foaming explosive clap
     trap in ascendance,

asserting how incredibly
     tremendous collusion between
     CIA, FBI and media
(must warrants revocation,
hence heroic intervention,
     and emergency dis
     Pence sing balance
     of security fabled

     clearances Aesop - Asap)
     hounds engaged "brilliance"
in (community) chance
of making an very
     usual fool of himself,
     viz the "FAKE"
     trumpeting dapper Don
     expostulating the latest ploy,

     raging against the machine
     i.e. entire popular culture
     will get their comeuppance
being so freely outspoken,
     a disgraceful unconstitutional defiance
which oh press
     sieve act of deviance
spluttered, thus an extreme

     measure to clamp down
     on all news outlets,
     and immediate disappearance
all the while poor
     Melania stoically, objectionably
     and lamentably stands
     right alongside him,
     (nonetheless nonverbally

2.
     metaphorically exhibiting
     vitriolic livid rage)
     as he rancorously spouts
     (ala VERY) convincing impression
     of la va reenactment qua,
Krakatoa volcanic disturbance
lambasting utter disgraceful disservice
(foxy Dis Putin

     commercial stations construe, conspire,
     conjure egregious collusion
     outlets asper dominance
a pugilistic ringside fan loathsomely
     (re: scowling non verbally),
     wherein pejorative spectators whether
     (moral less minority, and/or
     majority whips lashing) weather being

     subsequently splashed by
     LXXII spittle aged
     perspiring ogre) with exuberance
(like some voodoo freelance
sing hexed indigo gurl goo goo doll,
a villainous venal mummified
     rattle trap declaring forbiddance
from this moment forward grievance

fomented by via triple threat
     to American democracy
     sans, intransigence, insouciance, ignorance,
thus taking recourse upon the heads
     of "stupid" journalists forcing hand
toward "losers" who spread lies,
     hence president signs issuance
analogous to lance

sing (via strong trumpeting arm),
     a yuge bigly boil saying believe me
     (meaning him - ***** in chief)
asseverating the congressional,
     global, and orbital
     bulwark acting with noncompliance
necessitating entire military
     industrial complex arsenal

     heavily reinforced (at
     the expense of every social,
     governmental, environmental, etc cetera
     to manage unruly populace
     with mandatory diktat decreeing obeisance
with non dodging demagoguery
     huff ford ding auto-da-fé fiat ordinance
this platform to guarantee overdominance,

when November 2020 election
     for forty sixth president
     takes place with poignance!

(Land that doth marry mother lode
of sublime earthen land and sea).

Age of exploration
   ushered cruel fate
   against “red” men living
   in bliss by agents

   patch of eden north
   o Mason Dixon line
   latitude: 39.64839
   longitude: -75.95591 alee

perchance designed
   by divine providence
   with dyslexic humorous bents
   Cecil county Maryland

   lies like plump backward letter “e”
witnessed topographic erosion
   pocked imprimatur marked
   meteorological dents

   thru inundation of
   oceanographic propensities
   melding coastline like Galilee
in particular by Chesapeake Bay,

   that body of water
   abutting like natural fence
   first witnessed by captain
   John Smith in 1608

   mistaking himself tong tied
   in sole of Italy
learned faux pas, when crossing paths
   with Susquehannas hence,

   offered tobacco sticks to natives
   while recovering
   from injured wounded knee
said other sundry tribes curiously eyed
then (I utilized poetic license)
took smoke from packet of Kents
   which twist on actual
   historical facts manipulated by me
but more truthful account awash
   and replete with more

   than interspersed nonsense
   and incorporates tract situated
   in so called Fertile Crescent – see
settled by Europeans of English stock,

   who emigrated with nary a pence
   “taming” shrew like “noble savages”
    plied Leviathan sized ukuleles
whose might exploited for felling forests,
   which timber built cabins with vents.

aye savor the faire genetic blueprint
   extant unique to each of us
   with this quite alimentary aire
   including (that almighty,
   bottom, cushiony, dimpled,

   excretory functioning Gluteus Maximus
   i.e. the ***** when bare  
with subtle difference sans,
   both halves at first blush,
   but tucks upon closer scrutiny

   obvious inexactness crystal clear
as a bell jar, asper each body electric,
   whence deserved of en dear
ments despite however much junk in the trunk

   behind the private
   no trespassing (non verbalized)
   signs posted everywhere
off limits only to a select few like this bard
   attired as if from the Renaissance Faire
whose unconditional acceptance
   unlike the majority hoo gawk and glare

if bipedal hominid dealt
   chromosomal traits say with excessive hair
which mane of tangled strands,
   could be problematic and interfere
with coaxing, finagling,
   or inducing friendship with an initial jeer

from him or her averse
   toward such imperfection to boot
huff lawed physical human specimen
   such as this ole coot
(who haint really that old),  

   can upon command execute
a feigned display
   and appealing as fresh field picked fruit
at this stage of ma life
   donut give a rats ***, nor an owlish hoot

what other may decry about me,
cuz self acceptance doth agree
buzzing with greater confidence, esteem,
   and general weaknesses such
   as lack of physiognomy incongruent cee,

which asymmetry of this primate feel free
er than his pre/post pubescent
   corporeal essence he
near put himself in the hand
   of that grim reaper, a key
poor of lifeless beings,

   and well nigh got hold da mee
when in the throes up
   (vis a vis not bulimia) on Swiss side prithee
and as a solitary mwm gives no re
guard no matter others may find fault
   in the stars at my lack of sim mutt tree
gnome hatter judgements made
   I accept mice elf warts and all – yippee!

Google Embedded Microchip™¡åßç

Nowadays...ah so passe routine top notch roboticized
brain surgery ushers, inoculates, begets... promising
immunity against pesky flagging and/or absent minded
precursor to dementia praecox, alzheimer's regarding
partial/total recall asper memory, said loss linkedin with
age related degeneration, or perchance suffering axed

dentally (aka Sid Vicious syndrome) deadly lethally, wily
adroit, adept pugilistic hook courtesy Hawaiian aloha sly
and ****** Mister, (nonetheless Judy Is hush) punch
to the noggin, and/or misfortune befalls a chap courtesy
severe deliberate accidental blow to the head, (perhaps
employment related mishap versus domestic altercation

non risky tampering with gray matter, no longer relegated
to decreasing faulty excellently trained human hand/eye
coordination (operations performed by prestigious so old
school doddering doctors, when humanoids or androids
dream of shaving electric sheep in mock simulation tend
ding to shorn hirsute patient) can supplant out moded

neurosurgeons (a fraction of expense, plus highly always
alert maximally functional at one hundred percent), the
former predictably bankable low cost allowing, enabling
and providing (rocking round the clock) supremely deft,
flawless, sedulous trappings of science, (a small number
of generations ago, oh... just an aside Leonard Peltier,

a Native American activist and an enrolled member of the
Turtle Mountain Chippewa, who also genetically breaded
with sprinkling of Lakota and Dakota descent. He counts
as a vital member of the American Indian Movement aka
(AIM), and put forward a cogent notion to buzzfeed long
since forcibly dispersed, lambasted, scattered... native

peoples to embed during in utero development bot size,
nee microcosmic electronic circuit housing comprehensive
indigenous languages new inherently speak, yes I vouch
safe marginally compensatory for their Holocaust. A plus
side applying technology in general, and when indefatigable
robots in particular supremely jump start (batteries not

required) indigenous cultural identities rent asunder like...
greased lightning, this forward progressive application to
boost natural diminishing memory recall, whereby figurative
seat of thinking now popularly trending (giving expected
rapidly burgeoning, growing, proliferating... gerontological
bracket to captcha (rather to seize or) salad days boosting
opportunities for elderly folk revisit smarts of their youth.

Intrigued about cremation,
I sought GOOGLE to assuage curiosity
significant questions answered
clicking the following website
https://www.funeralwise.com/plan/
cremation/cremation-process/

though summarizing article
some oven death defying act,
yet summarization satisfactorily completed,
thus herewith briefly describes
kickstarting, mystifying, pulverizing...
tantalizing, yielding, enterprising, lasting,

yelping, holding, surviving dearly departed
1. deceased identified
2. official cremation authorized
affiliated with deceased
3. lifeless body prepared
4. medical devices removed

5. jewelry recovered
6. corpse secured
into burnable cremation receptacle
7. encased entity transferred
to retort i.e. cremation chamber
8. temperature range adjusted

between 1400 degrees -
1800 degrees Fahrenheit
9. 1.5 - 2 hours elapsed
10. magnet applied
residual metal removed

11. remains ground into ashes
12. once process completed
remains secured within urn
13. family representative entrusted
with ashes.

Burnt offerings distributed
ideally according to stated
wishes of beloved,
whose remembrance sustained
as tears expended
necessary to mourn
eventually sorrow lessened,
photographs visited
after crushing grief decreased.

Congressman and senators forewent
all manner of civility, fidelity and integrity wii
hull ding broadswords, derringers
and exhibiting the right to bare firearms
as all hell broke loose as testimony
to the dire prognostication foretold

more than saber rattling and Gatling guns que
kind from lambastes, fisticuffs
and brickbats ratcheted up as agents provocateurs nee
said obedience to semper fidelis credo, coda and **** knee
stance when dire straits called for restraint

against excess versus raising cane old hickory
i.e. Andrew Jackson latched onto when opposing with energy
plus verve espoused by fellow delegates,
and his hologram ghost ******

from battle scars outside and/or inside
the halls of government where blows bashed
dovetailed elected legislators to officiate
as angry birds viz brouhaha clashed
Federalist against their nemesis

of the twenty first century
during the term of Donald Trump
who throve on the cutthroat frenzied
internecine lawlessness dashed
to and fro, hither and yon

any hopelessness for civilians to escape bloodshed
spilled from without vaunted halls of justice,
the approach of doomsday
writ large as anarchy and mayhem flashed
with uproarious coup d’etat,

when Democrats outliers gnashed
teeth, and nonestablishmentarian outlaws
pistol whipped and hashed
tagged traitors who roared America
went bankrupt at sold at fire sale price slashed

when Donald Trump ran the country
into the ground evidenced by Molotov Cocktails residue
in concert with the sulfuric odor of hand grenades trashed
like some sorority or fraternity house
left the sanctified righteous West Wing

with powder puffs sans canisters
of pepper spray, whereby
most docile, humble, and liberal took a page
from playbook of Pandora, and took an aimless swing
at the root cause of melee by hurling objet’s d’art

at the pompous trump ping
Septuagenarian, whose platoons of goons
rent asunder peoples against their king
the donnybrook heathen, whose remarks
against libertarian rubric that made America great

wantonly soup peer egg go whist tickly
reviving prejudices declared dead
from yesteryear and his attempt to bring
back the glory days, when Whistler Blowers
getting water boarded and aching

deigning to implement dictatorship
of the Proletariat as a capital idée fix
weaving together, the salient strengths
viz founding fathers credo gave licks
to King George, and now in an ironic

twist and shout of fate through eclectic mix
basket of deplorables further shamed
by being routed by the New York Nicks
sewed jaws, heads of state, and dignitaries

with limping bodies spent like derricks
Oil used up and no place to go except
to keep Alice in Chains and
Alice Cooper Company with toys in the attics.

While high falutin dip low matt
flying his kite insurgents
planned coup d'etat
clear out of blue, a devilish
forked, jagged, knifed
dagger "O" type electric current licked

more'n the pants off harried envoy
clear rants heard
all the way to Timbuktu
**** donnybrook loosing mayhem
special averred ambassador
last best hope

thwarting total mortal Kombat
Zeus bribed - putin two and two...
together spelled collusion
arch enemies of democracy de facto
2020 election in cahoots,
whereby sore loser *******,

activated thinly veiled plot
made good diabolical promise
demanding winning or else
"ye ain't seen nuttin"
imposing himself victor
nee, declaring tyrannical

prince sup pulled "purple" reign,
despite just shy winning majority
crowed as "FAKE" optical illusion
claimed apparatchik infiltrated
voting booths rigged
machination stole courtesy

bounty on mutiny playbook page,
the average joe buyed
entire hook, sink, and liner
titanic ruse to unseat
all time self crowned best president,
apprentice skills garnered

thru "art of the deal,"
albeit machiavellian
who refused to admit defeat
usurped, proclaimed, kindled... diktat upon
those opposed driving fiat
vis a vis disallowing, discharging,

disenabling, disguising, distilling
carving up United States
in league courtesy
best buddies Kim Jong Un
populace will pay price
bear every burden

every hardship el don jon doth
punishingly mete out
recruiting military modern
death cab for cutie squads
***** deeds done dirt cheap
personal vendetta and vengeance

as just desserts
succeeding presidential term
to abdicate pronto
lest civilization bombed
back into stone age
no matter enfranchisement
law within lady liberty land,

nonetheless he decreed
global hegemony forever
pressed hot button
omnipresent nightmare manifest destiny
global destruction unleashed
threatened to obliterate
every last trace of mankind!

Saint Mary's Church -
3916 Locust Walk; City)
(Circa mid nineteen nineteen eighties
after the common lee
washed out tide dull era - CODA).

Naughty bits and pieces asper
     an uneventful memory came back
in a flash prompted by a pop up,
     (no...NOT the male *****),
     which noisily did clack
in my mind, and (methought
     hmm...a bit early in the season...
     mebbe Santa and his reindeer

     made a preseason debut),
     just this morn'n
     (a boot two plus months
     from today October 20th, 2018)
tubby more exact,
but most likely giving me flack
that cerebral din...,
     which would not abate?

just rusty cogs and cranky
     gears nar fail'n to generate
causing a screeching grate
analogous to soundgarden filled
     with 10,000 maniacs
     hood did gyrate
ting amidst flickr ring erratic
     my third eye blind

     began to habituate
where illumination, sans
     remembrance became clearer
apparently beckoning with
     wings at the speed of sound,
     sorely crying out
     particularly in sore need
     for me to partially hydrogenate

and/or elbow grease to lubricate
amp pull juice so I could intimate
more specifically, a flop
     and embarrassing date
all but forgot till this very moment,
     though nothing to equate
the heron now bird den sum present,
     to become linkedin with ill fate

that Sunday evening approximately,
     the half life of
     carbon based organic
     NON GMO matter  -
     Matthew Scott Harris
an awkwardly forced attempt
     to foster acquaintanceship,
     where gall didst grate

courtesy sans call of the wild,
     which brazenness,
     and faux brawniness
     then, I now hate
and perhaps abysmal outcome
     deserved of this then ingrate
okay, I pride myself
     to take an interpersonal dare

shot thru with anxiety to broker
     a conversation with an attractive gal
aesthetically pleasing with
     medium length sandy colored hair
and upon asking, she told me
     her name tubby Janet Houck
accompanied yours truly
     back to his dorm room

     where we did nothing but talk
(and learned her home
     town matched my own)
suddenly feeling gun shy,
     shrinking into an occupied
     emotionally fortified wall -
     hermetically sealed
     with top brand caulk

     and then...? I did balk
where former emboldened gutsiness
     drained away from me,
cuz intimate liaison
     golden opportunity
     slipped away awk
word lee upended by
     my pullulating nervous jabbering.

As Halloween costume,
one year during early grade school,
my father got brilliant idea
for sole son dressed
uniquely ******* qua
putrid offal getup.

Missus Shaner (talon clawed,
shriveled relic archaeopteryx dinosaur,
who taught fifth grade) gave
me first prize, and subsequently
felt so convinced about authenticity

of this kid being “white
trash”, she notified another
classmate dressed as janitor
to dispense me in school dumpster.

The receptacle sanitation
disposal company bequeathed
altruistic dumpster vis a vis
to dive amidst maggoty muck

(in addition to real *******
in dumpster) nearest landfill
loaded with all kinds
of junk, viz food scraps,
recyclables, and soiled diapers.

Over short span of time,
detritus commingled into
one brew of despicable,
fly haven, jiggling lifelike,
nursing putrescence re: teeming

vibrantly, mark kid lee,
noisomely... with yum zuck
for swamp thing, I seemed
metamorphosing into
by cruel hoax.

Nothing prepared, neither sickened
nor violated senses of smell,
sight, taste, and touch to
maximum factor tolerated
of each odious blast, each

pestilential assault issued an
appalling refrain sans:
The Idler Wheel Is Wiser than
the Driver of the *****
and Whipping Cords Will

Serve You More than Ropes
Will Ever Do, before mine
myopic bespectacled eyes
(smarting from constant comet
drubbing irritants (which

glasses kiddie bifocals caked
with smudge good as naught),
stayed shut while inundation
of corrosive gaseous shaped
oxbow wreath wisps.

Liberty vis a vis in sight envisioned
visibly threatened offshoots
of tendril spikes; snaking sneakily,
sordidly slithering silently,
yet straightaway as a scene from
some spooky sideshow,
or “haunted house”.

This ugly slop
splashed upon mine formerly
pristine academic uniform
appeared near identical to
l grubby, crabby, arguably

meanest lunch lady
served i.e. via lob stirring)
splattered sundry speckles
sundry detritus found me
writhing with nausea.

Thee nasty muck and mire found
formerly introverted boy
transformed into sponge bobbing
squarely panting creature

from the black lagoon, whose
sea legs set sought semi-
solid stated surface to stand
upright amidst variegated
flotsam and jetsam.

Dishabille appearance acquired
fresh splattered coat of rancid
slimy ham and bacon
covered arms (among other
pieces of moldy clothes,

food and iconic library oddment
ricocheting unpredictably
as trash truck violently
shook up and down all
night long en route on

highway to hell to Moyer’s
Dump, which toxic brew
would be declared Superfund
Site and shuttered
in near future.

Once Robert
Hall wardrobe affixed with
capital one fancy feast of
grateful dead roadkill,
kickstarter from some automotive

contraption, and plenti of
fish heads (with square
pants trimmed with
lovely bones), I felt
indistinguishable from regular
riffraff riding shotgun.

When trucker parked and stopped
awful bin laden made ready to
empty contents within mountain
of olfactory noxious material.

A thought occurred, now might be
golden, (or rather **** steeped)
opportunity to extricate
myself from morass of
mish mashed, linkedin kind
dulled juggernaut, icky
first class bric a brac.

Henry Kline Boyer Elementary School
Evansburg, Pennsylvania
circa ~ 1969 ADD:
A(fter) D(umpster) D(diving).

As a Halloween
     costume, that fifth year
literally dug up materials,
     sans throw away wear
during grade school,

     my father got veer
re: brilliant idea
     for this sole son,
     which found gritty
     sanitation crew unclear

but right at home
     on animal farm,
     and/or role with
     pigpen didst share
this original getup cost Peanuts,

     but caused a big stink to rear
up dressed depleted oxygen,
     and many classmate didst swear
objectionable odor
     also induced eyes to tear.

Missus Shaner (the talon
     clawed, shriveled queer
looking relic of a dinosaur,
     who taught – for near
lee a millennium fifth grade)

     gave me - up pair
of gooey (Paraguay)
     “FAKE” genuine heir
looms (bone a fide kitchen
     middens) artifacts mere

wrack que less originally care  
lessly tossed out by
     indigenous: Guaraní,
     Ayoreo, Toba-Maskoy,
     Aché and Sanapan
discovered in present
     day capital, dear
lee benevolent holy city
     steeped in prayer:
(Nuestra Señora Santa
     María de la Asunción).

Authentic “FAKE” Central A mere
reek'n (American) rank
     and file putrid bare
lee tolerable plum
     rancid rotten ancient

     ******* handily found
     teacher to declare
me the putative winner
     since everyone else
     passed out from the fetid air.

Circa - approximately early
to late nineteen sixties,
     where yours truly
found himself surly,
particularly compounded
     if my parents,

where Mister and
Missus Santa Claus
played by Boyce and
Harriet Harris respectively

     failed to purchase
     for this sole son,
thee latest trendy
     toy, sans whirly
gig, gizmo, or
     fuzzy electric doohickey,
     BUT NOTHING girly.

Translation: Inxs of
     severe (incurable) envy
     infected Matthew Scott
most pronounced, asper
   quantity of presents,

     the gratitude receiving gifts
     meant diddly squat
if I counted less goodies,
     than either eldest,
     and/or youngest sister got.

This rancor kept
     under (ahem) wraps
though ironically, either
     sibling oohed and ahed
     over some fancy shmancy
     garment with snaps,

which this lad
     feigned ambivalence,
     indifference, or
     repugnance toward getup
     for young chaps.

No sooner did the
     last, (and usually
     biggest) boxed surprise
found these then kiddie
     fingers tearing into,
     when thine irritating
     nasal voice didst rise

above the melee "That's all,"
     or some variation
     on said theme blurted out
     as "FAKE" real lies
already, eagerly, and impatiently
     anticipating same holiday
     three hundred and sixty

     five days, hence unaware
     how fast "time flies"
now this soon to be newly
     minted sexagenarian eyes,
those memories of innocent
     naiveté, and bliss

     with sentimental nostalgia
     (envision: slight moisture
     around tear ducts), and
     aye close this poem
     with reminiscence dabbed
     with tissue sadness dries.

This papa did accurately
surmise undeclared war
strong armed lance pierced my armour,
ah...how fondly he recalls
early fatherhood days of yore,
when daddy's first born girl

did effusively adore
yours truly, he likened self as topnotch
trooper, who mustered vigour
exhibiting untrammeled unconditional
tender loving behaviour
before conflict erupted as between

mainland China and Uighur
back in the day din and clangour
honed, perfected, battle
tested... mine steely danse zing mettle
admirable trait evinced by this troubadour,
when understandable mutiny arose 'tween

me and "Munchkin" donut ask anymore,
why spouse described eldest
with pet name eldest she smoothly bore
intermittent flashpoints smoothed, sans
24/7 at beck and call, I availed to assuage
with papa's magical succor

distressed damsel (daughter number one),
she established an endearing rapport
with me telepathic sixth sense touchstone
oft times found even how sailors swore
dem crude words
extraneous, ridiculous, superfluous...

if unhappiness did evidently colour
hint, asper hinting off kilter her humour
characteristic woeful crimp evoking dour
demeanor accompanied unhappiness countenance
easily placated thru cuddling, viz comfort
and reassurance, the panacea wherefore

"star student" resumed former activity,
which nurturing trend came to screeching halt
as said lass matured courtesy
puberty, where rancor
more challenging than...

childhood summoning more
than a spontaneous gambit,
hence necessity fore
age appropriate strategy to reconnoiter
parental strategy as throwing feint against
emotional foe, feeble fiery feedback

unseated formerly unrivaled dada furthermore
awkwardness arose when teenage solace
sought among preferred best friend(s)
accelerated as das dada lost lustrous glamour
plus, his snappy truculent unfettered
brusqueness, especially when minimizing

computer screen window "this bear did roar"
"nothing," when unconvincing feint "fake" retort
she saw deception, vis a vis married man scour
ring and/or posting personal classifieds
which mutiny capsized bounteous

fidelity, gentility, integrity...no labour
of love kin aright
now, an invisible oaken wall betwixt us
n'er to be rent asunder, e'en when rigor
mortis gives reason for grim reaper to snigger.

(alter knit lee titled: vita in oculis nudato)

goo goo gaga I wanna yell
cuz, synonymous
     with other wordsmiths,
     or...well
whatever will eire'n burr,

     a sought after creative
     passionate pursuit aye tell
ye a boot me own aha...eureka insightful
     revelation explaining
     ma quotidian writing spell,

and phalanges skitter
     across qwerty keyboard
     at light in an attempt to quell
onslaught tidal wave crashing

     upon me conscious state pell mell
which tsunami flood spongy
     heady gray matter with hell
over high tide heals assailing,

     bruiting, clobbering this fell
low inducing (me) to play
     Handel's Semantic Water Music
     on the smallish piccolo cello

which Sirens of Tighten,
     (who just appeared out of thin aire -
     cuz scriveners can resort
     to prestidigitation to make appear

any necessary entity
     without rhyme or reason),
     anyway, this sylph sea Oceanids nymph
     i.e. mermaids didst dee clear

particularly via
     barely audible verbal communication
     sotto voce en dear
ring gently beckoning
     affinity this modest heir

to secret himself within secluded lair
whence, an automatic
     erectile flickr, kickstarted,
     levitated, and manifested

an instantaneous jubilant kik
     lobbed me near
this seductive, sedulous, and sedum
     scented sir experienced hypnotic stare

charming froto into trance scandent state
as if by magic the tubular
     testicular proboscis didst inflate
aptly serving as modus operandi flagellate
thus proving a "happy ending" against being celibate.

Soon after our family settled
into the sprawling estate
named "Glen Elm" approximate
half century old from date
mentioned in title, said treasure
rosy Gypsy foretold fate

Harriet Harris, (daughter
of Antebellum Rebecca great
Kuritsky - Brooklyn transplanted
Southern Belle), create
head "FAKE" story, whereby
former did absquatulate

with jack of all trades (Boyce
Brandon Harris) too late
above named ramshackle
mansion, they remained mate
to each other til death did
thee mum part, congratulate

sans, her high school chums
felt envious - girls did rate
papa (now octogenarian widower)
most handsome (master) bait,
whose smarts earning advanced
degree applying his pate

as mechanical engineer for
General Electric did satiate
penchant solving complex
mathematical equations tete
a tete for super intelligent
entrepreneurial fella alleviate

head real passion rehabilitating
derelict property, allocate
ting leisure time resuscitating
neglected homes ameliorate
head procreative itch practically
rebuilding this did animate

dad's profuse true calling
spending hours fame did anticipate
(though papa quite modest,
and other people gushed appreciate
ting self taught revitalizing

unseen hidden gem and to articulate
unique artistic flair himself
as taskmaster masterpieces intimate
ting creations nobody, but
himself could imagine brilliance pate
drew forth unbelievable

enhancements doppelganger did berate
rarely could family, friends,
strangers...do more than capitulate
with ceaseless praise always
adding final touches to captivate
most flattering aura, charisma,

karma (credit) perfectly calibrate
head aesthetic qualities even
shabbiest building communicate
ting magic touch of, who plied
blood, sweat and tears culminate
ting in unbelievable transformation

particularly, how to designate
ideal amount of appeal to abode
came to screeching halt dissipate
head after mum passed, and papa's
raw talent earned thru educate

ting himself, no amount of inborn
inherent blueprints did illustrate
native bent, BUT no new life could
resurrect demise of his queen soulmate!

Hub bomb bin hubble emotional wreckage
tell tale signs of internal war
ah, there moost be lifelong conspiracy
afoot for a Galician voar

try as I might to Lyft myself
out of penury...this Uber
scribe reckons way back when,
my life took a irrecoverable dee tour,

tis neither pity nor philanthropic succor
this poor man asks,
but just the chance to roar
(albeit within structures of silence)

shaky psychological scaffolding
built from shabby and poor
Scottish matted Harris tweed
material re: mailhouse order

(same as me bartered bride)
assembly required blueprints defied
comprehension, and thus...only my
into whoosh shin as singular guide,

which puzzling quandary sorely
tested frustration, I could not hide
overstressed mental cogs, and
wheels issued steam from inside

the bowels (ah... oh...
moving) within this, nor
thorn prickly human being, more
or less condemned to live
in this mancave, where folklore...
I don't believe that bupkis,
about some ****

rubble, but...nonetheless,
yours truly unable to account
for this...friggin landmine miss fore
chin, where nuttin boot

this misanthrope jammed
in a hole like EEyore
moost all bajillion years living in the dark...
as if... yeah ****** in the core

of a black hole, thus
the best available
explanation given destiny did ride
me roughshod into the maw of despair,

now no matter these gnarled
arthritic hands unable to...
ugh...heave **...grunt
purportedly nada so easy slide

anatomical pieces together
according to schematic
drawing, aye tried,
hence best this crabby hermit vied
to be condemned remaining separated
(since birth), sans
webbed world infinitely wide.

(whose video powerfully, profoundly, and
positively affected this southeastern residing
Pennsylvania papa)!

Afflicted with Cystic Fibrosis since her birth
contagious exuberance, gung-**,
     infectious jubilance noah dearth
which eye opening (then tearing)
     podcast link sent tummy
     FaceBook account,
    she distilled and
     didst poignantly blog the

     purpose driven life,
     no matter...hmm...
     her existential time
nearing thee finis
     line on planet Earth
though upworthy defying
     deathly clasp of grim reaper,
     who scythe lent

   lee doth await
she (titled lass of poem) established
     a substantial supportive network,
     via such an up
     beat aura, charisma,
     persona, et cetera create
ting global bond sans,
     world wide web, aye equate
chance lucky opportunity

     to witness airily especial
     and gutsy acceptance
     of her (congenital) grim fate
while this healthy
     (as an oxymoron) lix
     spit tilling chap doth hate
sweaty palms (a minor,
     though tolerable inconvenience)

     versus being irate
at an accursed disease
     still no cure as of late,
yet...state of
     the art revolutionary treatments
     provide longevity, and... YES
     possibility to discover a mate
though consigning severe limitations

but...WOW, that girl (unknown
     til yesterday) doth narrate
positivity, which amazing
     will power didst permeate,

within thine noggin
     triggering sincere flowing tears
     bursting forth at an unstoppable rate
hence this attempted rye
     ming livingsocial tribute
     to go for broke
     esprit de corps elan trait
completing a bucket list
    while eternal sleep will wait!