It's terrible
To be in love
With someone who constantly
Tears you to pieces

Because the only thing
That will fix you
Is their touch
Stitching you back together

He and I
Are patchwork quilts
With stitches
In our stitches
And new holes fraying
As fast as we mend them

I'm putting down
My needle and thread
I'm done sewing
And I'm done with
New holes

We will never be
New and whole again
But our quilt
The details in the fabric
The scars of our past
The hope for our future
Will always be
My favorite one

It's just that
I had a terrible night
And I want to talk to you
Because you always make me
Forget the pain
And nothing seems as bad
When I'm with you

But I can't talk to you
I don't know how

I want my best friend back
But  you don't
Want me here

Maybe you'd be happier
If I never existed
I hate myself
For causing you pain
And stress
Because I want to be
The one to make everything bad
Just go away
But then I myself
Would have to
Disappear

For your sake
I would

I have never been a good swimmer
I can't jump in a pool
Without plugging my nose
I can't hold my breath
Underwater
I can't tread water
When the waves are high

I am drowning
In the push and pull
Of this riptide
The waters are churning
And so is my mind

We will never be
Calm waters
So we'll slip beneath
Into the comforting arms
Of numbing pain
Maybe we'll find each other again
Someday

There is nothing I can do
To make you want me
In your life
Like I want you in mine
And I guess
That's what hurts
More than anything

I am not your friend
But you will always be mine

I used to float
Weightless and free
In a sea of blue green
But now I'm just drowning
Slipping father under
There's no way out
Of this blue green
Abyss

I was never a jealous person
Until I met you
I envy your sheets
That comfort you
In your restless sleep
I envy the sun
That kisses your face awake
In the tired morning
I envy the cold
That settles into your bones
And stirs your blood
I am a jealous person
Because I want to be
Something you need
But I am not