his souls reminds me with the colour of the sky in the morning
he's listening to his music right now thinking about something red

whenever he smile,
he smile with both of his eyes

I'm here, he's there
but the thoughts of him
is always on my mind

Long bus journeys,
Pouring rain. Soaked to the bone,
Hunger pains.
Its already dark out,
Almost six. Waiting for the bus,
I feel so sick.
I'm alone. I'm so alone.
I'm off the bus, its seven
According to my phone.
Walking in the miserable dark,
Down the familiar path,
I'm dreading "home", Detention please take me back.
I get in the door, get yelled at and go up the stairs.
I'll just rest my head, I wake up to my alarm.
I'm  lying in bed.
I panic. My homework. It wasn't done last night
I'm crying, if i tell the truth they'll think I'm lying,
Its not alright.
I didn't forget. I didn't forget,
To them I lied and said the opposite.
They said "All the chances I gave you I regret"
"Just do your homework"
Do you not think i try? My essays are incomplete cause i stay up half the night, being yelled at.
"PLEASE EXCUSE AMELIA FOR NOT FINDING THE TIME TO DO, TWO MATHS PROBLEMS IN BETWEEN BEING EMOTIONALLY ABUSED"
So you give me MD after MD, saying it will "help" me.
To you I'm just another wasted youth with potential thats lazy,
I deserve no credentials because my work and attitude is hazy.
You must think that I dont care ,
But really I do, I'm trying I swear.
I cant fit school into my schedule.
Dear school, I really had fun,
With my friends, and now I'm almost done.
But you didn't help,all you did to me was yell.
You don't know me,im just a name and number on paper.
But perhaps my experiences would shock you like a tazer.
Stop being rude to your students, we all have our own ****,
Be nice instead, we all struggle a good bit, be nice dont pretend.
Yours unfortunately, Amelia
The End.

Please never steal, lie or cheat.
But if you must
Steal..
steal away my sorrows.

If you must
Lie..
Lie with me every night.

And if you must
Cheat...
Cheat death.

Mum, please, I need you to listen.
I'm not trying to make something out of nothing,
I'm just fighting with my mind and I feel lonely.
Mum, please, I do not mean to be a burden
But I'm locked inside my own thoughts
And I can no longer escape,
For you see my depression is controlling me.
Some days it is like a tiny fly
The next it swallows me into its icy shadow.
These days mum are the days I long to die.
You say it's selfish and cowardly to want to die
But please, it's not so much that I want to die,
It's just I don't want to live.
Mum, these days I am held prisoner inside my own bed.
You say I'm just being typically lazy
But I'm not trying to be.
I'm just afraid that if I get up I will drown within everything I long to forget.
Mum, please... Just listen to me.
You say I should get out more, see my friends
So I try like I know I should want to
But I wish for them to cancel these plans
For my anxiety torments my mind
And claws at my chest.
You ask where anxiety... another problem came from?
Yes mum, anxiety teaming up with depression
Increasing my many fears that haunt manipulate my life.
They come along as if to a party
Mum I am that party
Only this a party I do not want to attend.
At the end of the day I am tired of fighting with myself
And once more depression beckons me to my bed
Cradling my spent body until I once again feel numb.
Mum, please this is not to do with you.
You ask me why I'm too busy to stop and enjoy life
But I am never truly busy
I just mean I'm trying to keep distracted
Because I am lonely and feel isolated.
You say you cannot see where this has came from
Well, mum, neither do I!
You always say be more mire positive
Oh how I have tried but am always reminded of things I want to forget.
You've said light a candle to eliminate the dark
But I'm not afraid of the dark, I'm afraid of living!
Maybe this is part of the problem.
Mum, please I'm begging you to listen
I'm so scared that I cannot find my way back out.
You say you don't know what else to do.
Neither do I.
I'm lost and I cannot come back.
Mum, please, I just want you to be there when I need you!