it's not about
ninety-nine cent cards
from the dollar store,
or milk chocolate
in the shape of a heart

it's not about
feeling bad for yourself
because you're single
or going out
to an expensive dinner

it's not about
how many bouquets
or "happy valentine's day"
text messages you receive

love is beautiful,
it is forbearing and selfless,
it is not bitter or rude,
it is modest and humble


so even if you think today
was created by hallmark
to sell more cards

why not show love
to someone
you care about?
or even to
a complete stranger

you don't have to have
a boyfriend or girlfriend
or husband or wife
or "significant other"
to celebrate today

because everyday
is a wonderful day
to love someone

what do you do
when you love someone
and you're bursting
to let them know

but you van't
because it's destructive
it's no good for you
and it's no good for me

i can't let go of it
i love you today
and tomorrow
and i love you
past any thought
i could think up

it's wrong though
because you aren't right
you blemish my heart
and leave me with bruises
that will never fade

so what do i do?
because i can't stop
loving you

tears are forming in my eyes
because all i can think about
are my bare bedroom walls,
naked and dull
and how when i embraced you
and told you i loved you,
you didn't say it back

it feels like i'm standing
on the edge of a cliff
next to a calm sea
and at any moment
i could slip into the blue abyss

quietly, the water would
burden my lungs
and with my last breath,
i would whisper
"tomorrow will be better."

i don't want to sleep
because i don't want to wake up
and be the same person

i feel ugly, repulsive, disgusting
your words were like venom
and i spit them right back

this hatred is controlling me
and i don't want it to,
i don't want to be like this

i fear that things
will never be okay with us,
i fear that i really am the problem