I'm re-watching Donnie Darko
because I like it
but mainly because I know you like it
and maybe I'm just trying to think of you
not that I have to try

I could tell from her silence
that she wasn't fit for speaking to many people.

I could tell by the way she shakes
that she hasn't gotten much to eat recently.

I could tell by her sleeves slipping back
that she wasn't always shattered there.

I could tell from the ink on her hands
that she was always in a world she tended to invent.

I could tell from the way she rubbed her eyes
that she was forgetful of the black rimmed there,

and I could tell by the black
that she wanted nothing more than to be beautiful.

I could tell from the fault lines across her forehead when she wrote
that it was what she loved most of all.

I could tell by the cover of almost torn from her notebook
that she took it with her wherever she went.

I could tell she searched for love
but I could tell she was afraid of finding it.

Let me write poems
On your back; true words don't flow
From ink and paper

nobody warns you about the first boy who tells you he wants to marry you.

nobody warns you about the tangible shift in the universe when he parts his lips to smile.

nobody warns you about the poetry he'll write you or how your knees will weaken or the melancholy hidden between the layers of his laughter.

nobody warns you that miles will morph into lightyears and you will curse the ocean for being the only thing that keeps his fingers from resting between yours.

nobody warns you about the day his sweater doesn't smell like him anymore.

nobody warns you that human hands are incapable of holding a person together.

nobody warns you that sometimes love is not enough, no matter how much you wish it was.

nobody warns you about the crippling nostalgia that renders you breathless.

nobody warns you about the nights when silence screams for your blood.

nobody warns you about the crater that forms in your chest in the middle of the night when he doesn't answer.

nobody warns you about how it's going to feel when he tells you he's in love with someone else.

nobody warns you that forever is a lie.

- m.f.