And I do believe I was created,
Naturally selected
By mother nature herself.
How can I take offense at Darwinism?
I am the fittest,
And I have survived.
I am the product of millions of years of evolution,
And that's a lot to live up to.

Whisper words
And feather bones,
Lips like echoes,
Eyes like shadows.
Unbreakably ephemeral.

Silent steps
On carpet,
Night thief
With her cloak of stolen stars.

It is easy enough to pretend
She was never there
At all.

My mouth tastes like cucumbers
Mixed with regret.
The air hums with electric energy
And the smell of rain.
I want it to be winter again
So I can watch the snow
Cover up my tracks.
But for now I'm left with
Footprints in the mud
So that everyone can see
Where I've been.

And it's like
Every time I fell apart,
You were there
To patch me up
With stitches and bandages.
And now, even though I've healed underneath
And will not fall apart,
Tearing away those protections
Still ******* hurts.

And it's strange,
This not knowing my own mind.
This "was is the drugs
Or the meds
Or life?
Or was it
Just me?"

A sea of contradictions,
Full of fear,
But empty.
Dying to feel anything at all,
But living
To escape.

And today,
I am me with no pretending,
Spread bare,
Torn open raw and bleeding.
Today, I am not a perfect mess for you to fix,
A riddle begging to be solved,
A player of games.
Today, I am not the hero,
The villain,
Or the martyr.
Today, I will not throw myself at your feet
Or lie and say I do not love you.
Today, I will be me,
Even if that isn't what you want.

These many secret stirrings
Band together
To form a tapestry of verse,
Of sound,
Of color.
Scattered fragments
Puzzle into place,
United after a lifetime
Of drifting in air
Like so many specks of dust.
And these little suspended things,
These pieces so useless alone,
Meet and find meaning.

And I,
The product of puzzles,
Of tapestries,
Of so many meanings;
I,
The artist,
The poet,
The singer;
I
Give shape to these accumulations
Of nothings which together form somethings,
Turn these somethings from thought to form
And set them sailing into the world
So that one day,
Perhaps,
You will find them
And know me.