ang mga salitang nais **** sabihin
natutunaw na lamang sa dulo ng iyong mga labi
natutunaw na lamang sa dulo ng iyong mga daliri
na tila'y kandila
tumutulo sa sahig
habang ang ilaw ng apoy nito'y sumasayaw sa hangin
lumalaki, lumiliit
at sa huli ay mawawala.

i am a wavebreaker
i am a bloated body drifting in the ocean
i stop boats in their paths
for wealthy tourists to gawk
and ask me
where im from, where im headed, where ive been
but i only reply in silence
and bubbles that escape my lips

i am a wavebreaker
i cut through the waves like a blade to the neck
i rot and i burst
and i spread the remnants of myself across the world
to be remembered
to be known
to let them know of my remains
that i remain

i am a wavebreaker
i break the waves caused
by those wanting to wreck cities
i am what goes against the current
i am what stays when everything rushes past me

i am a wavebreaker.

the heart of a whale
each beat i hear through the sea
but empty, it is
no more love to give
only sadness and woe
only regret to show
to you
and to me.

The world spins at high speeds
But I feel things in slow motion
I see and hear everything at once
The loud music and commotion

Guitar riffs and booming drums
I listen to them
My heart sinks and my head aches
As I wake up in confusion

Late night bad decisions
And early morning unanswered questions
Once in a lifetime confessions
Filled with lifelong realisations

Sitting on rooftops during the sunrise
The cold breeze through the trees
The green leaves tinted red from the sunlight
Silent moments of peace

All these things, all of the above
All of the things that make me feel in love
I'll love you more, each day I live through
I'll love you more when I think of you.

when the sun dies, the moon will burn brighter than it did before
a silent cry of light
as celestial tears run down the moon's crater-filled face
and drips into the ocean
as the waves swell and swallow
like a rip in space
a blackhole
once the sun takes its final breath
when the sun dies, the earth shall be a witness
and would die too
as the sun burns through everything in reach

when the sun dies, so shall the moon.

where do the bad people go if hell isn't real?
will they linger on in a never ending limbo,
walking never ending roads to never ending nothingness?
will they cease to exist,
dissipate into thin air?
would they think back on their lives,
the crimes they've committed?
would they try to seek forgiveness,
for every ounce, every drop of blood or sweat or tears they've shed for their own selfishness?
would they be sorry for what they did?
or would they remain prideful and allow the maggots to eat away at their flesh?
maybe they'll remain on earth
to watch others go on with their lives
maybe they'll watch their families,
how they go on with their daily business without them
maybe they'll watch the lives of the people they've wronged,
how they smile knowing they're gone
maybe they'll rewatch their lives,
from the day they were born to the day they died
over and over and over again

and maybe that's the hell
maybe hell was within them
and they were hell itself.

you feel like the colour yellow
bright and harsh against my eyes
like sun rays
in the noon sky
like etchings of gold
that drip into my hands
or the soft petals of a wildflower
growing in a field
or even the celestials
the divine beings dripping in light
all that's holy and whole
once again.

i zone out
when i find myself
falling in a rabbit hole
mid-comment scroll
to think of nothing
and everything
to think of where i am
where im headed
and where ill stop
to think of who i was
who i am
who im being
and who ill become
to think of why i do the things i do
what my purpose is
what it is to be in love with myself
like how all the other girls seem to be.