let's go to the markets
thrifting
star gazing
road tripping
wandering through forests
staying in motels
music festivals
travel to new towns
i long for those things
with you

hey
if you want to be in my life
because you connect with me
my thoughts
emotions
interests
values
just let me know
i don't want fake friends
i want connections that set my soul on fire
thank you

i am sick of not being entirely myself
i think it is time i let go of people's expectations
and do my own thing

i miss you more than you know
the thing is
i don't think i ever i cross your mind
and that hurts
it really kills me
to know you're fine without me
maybe happy
and i am struggling to get through my days
without seeing your face
crumbling at the very thought of you
i miss you so dearly

imagine our engagement
our wedding
so perfect
our home
decorated with our old records
starting a family
watching our children grow
growing old with you
til death do us part

why can't you just come back
say you miss me
and really mean it
why can't you love me again
make me smile
and stay forever

Waking up to a heavy chest
My body begging me to sleep again
And my anxiety begins the second I realize I'm alive
I'm trying to learn to function
With all of this negative energy inside me
I know it'll pass and
I know it'll get better
But right now it hurts
I feel unloved
Unloveable
I feel lost inside myself
A place I can't stay too long
Before I lose my mind
I can tell myself I'm worth it and
That my worth isn't defined by others
And it works for a bit
Until something else comes up and
My heart loses its energy
And I either feel like giving up
Or ready to fight everyone