It just needs to rain.
For too long, the sky has shown itself. Naked. Dry. Emotionless.
Not a signal of weakness in the day,
no tears to rid in the night.

I just need to see it again.
To feel it again.
To smell it again.

The clouds need to come in
Not too much; not too dark.
Just enough for the earth to prove that it's human too.
The sun needs to be weak.
Just hanging off the horizon,
not at its brightest
but at its warmest.

And then it just needs to rain-
To cry;
Because I want to feel it too.
I want to be the water that hits the pavement
And I want to be a reflection of the world in that exact moment, joined in a puddle of human emotion.

It needs to rain because the sky is human too.
It needs to rain so I can feel a little blue.

In this moment the rain will wash everything away,
And from this view down where the houses don't change,
It is here that I'll stay.

I used to be able to fly.
It was incredibly simple,
effortlessly easy.

I used to kiss the sky
with my wings by my side-
two loyal companions
in a treacherous war.

The war had four letters-
four letters; all matter.
Four letters, each carrying
a destructible weapon.

L.I.F.E

They blinded me
and I couldn't tell which one it was,
but one of them had hands.
Merciless hands.
Enemy hands.
Peppered hands.

Ten fingers plucked at my wings-
ripping my feathers out one by one like
plucking eyelashes from a human eye.

I held unlucky pennies.
I breathed the air of space.
I felt the knife of a killer.
I heard nothing-
nothing at all.

But I guess you have to lose your wings in order to understand what it is that truly makes you fly.

Words don't do any justice
to the way I feel.
I could be so detailed
and so raw,
but it would still come out vague and untouching.

Words don't do any justice
to a broken heart.
Time is the enemy
that will help heal it,
so your left with fragmented poems
trying to describe how it felt
when you let go...
all you come up with is nothing.

Words don't do any justice
to cure a disease.
It will eat at her everyday
until she is nothing left
but white lips and a pale face-
a number to a growing list.
You'll only be able to say you love her,
but the words won't cure the disaster
that was created in her departure.

Words can only do justice
when it's over.
When the tears have crumbled the paper.
When the edges are curled
from twirling the ends waiting for
the perfect thing to say.

Words are beautiful and real.
Words are hard and often misunderstood.

Don't fall for me
Don't fall in love with me
When you love me
you also love my
mishaps
flaws
mistakes
demons
I will over-analyze you
and every word you say
and every move you make
You'll see that I'm a mess
and majority of the time
I don't know what the hell is
going on
I'm a clutz and trip over my own
two feet
I'm needy and I'll often ask you if you seriously do
love me
My emotions are so big and wide that I have enough to go
around for everyone who doesn't give a ****
but if you decide to fall in love with me
regardless of all this
I'll write you poems so sweet
that they'll sound like melodies
I'll love you like the sun loves the moon
I'll care for you in a way that is so gentle and delicate
I will always be there
I'll be your rock
I'll love all the things you swear you hate about yourself
I'll make constellations out of your freckles
and a new galaxy will be found in your eyes
I'll find beauty in your flaws
and you'll wonder why you never loved yourself
in the way that
I love you

My moment is finally going to happen and I should be ecstatic.
I should be screaming at the top of my lungs that I'm finally going to be heard.
That what I've been working for is finally going to pay off.

But I'm not, and I don't think I can.

Im petrified, because the world is terrifying.
They're going to judge me or they're going to love me.
Okay, maybe I'm terrified in a petrifying world....
It all looks the same.
Feels the same.
Sounds the same.

But that's the most comforting aspect of it all.
That analogy will never change.
The way the world is is just how it is and there's nothing i can do about that.

But Me?
There's a lot of things that could change me.

I'm not the world.
But I sure do act like it,
Sunshine and raining.
Pulling tides and hurricanes.
But the world will always be the world.

And I have a horrible feeling I won't always be me.