i’m tired of spending every waking hour thinking about you
i’m tired of consoling you when you’re sad
and i’m tired of thinking that just because we connected so fast on such a deep level we’re soulmates that just haven’t had our time yet.
i’m starting to think that it’s never going to be our time,
and surprisingly i’m okay with that.

you walked up to me
and we greeted each other with the stupid “classic white people” half smile
like we always do
and you said hey
and that we have our leadership thing this wednesday.
we talked about your eye surgery
and how i didn’t have time to eat dinner that night;
nonchalant little small-talk
that i normally would hate,
but with you it felt like the most intellectual conversation of my life.
standing there
you in that tux
and me in my ballgown
it felt normal,
like this was something we did everyday.
reality hit hard when you said goodbye
to go find the girl you came with.

the last time i got a manicure
was the day i met you.
you helped me pick out the color,
a coral pink gel that i hated until you said it looked nice.
the longest we went without talking that day was the 5 minutes it took my nails to dry.
the manicure wore off after 2 weeks
but the crush certainly didn’t.

why do you still worship her,
when all she did was leave you broken?
you deserve better than this.

-to the guy in love with his ex