He told me he loved how
I could put my reality into words
and now
they're all about him

He told me he wanted to be a romantic
have words flow out of him like birds
instead of caged and frantic
little did he know that's all they ever are

They say it takes 66 days to form a habit
And anywhere from 18 to 254 to break it

I'm on day 20
And in my head I still call you honey

The world hasn't stopped spinning
And they tell me I'm still winning

Yet my inbox stays empty
While my anxiety is plenty

Maybe I'm just pathetic
While my friends call me neurotic

You can't teach an old dog a new trick
Though at seventeen most lesson stick

In the limited experience
The teenage mind exhibits
A Greek tragedy arises
With no will nor thought left to prohibit it
From following the fall

To be loved by all those around
Yet so utterly alone, is this fault owned?
Have the stars behind our eyes
Been blinded instead of honed
Coming home on your knees you crawl

To be loved to be loved to be loved
To pine to pine to pine
Tempting fate or maybe raging hormones
Listening to Arctic Monkeys at one because we're fine
With this unknown wall

Is it selfish
That I miss your secrets, your loudness
The way I knew everything
Or I thought I did

Is it selfish
That I miss being the one, you turned to when a mess
Laughing the loudest with
Because there was nothing we hid

Is it selfish
That I miss every **** thing, every habit
Each small moment
Like we were all eachother had

Is it selfish
That I miss calling you mine, the only one who could have it
A world as perfect as you
Even though in the end I made you sad

A cracked screen protector
But only around the edges
Slowly wearing away towards the middle
A life hanging off the ledges

Two layers, two ways to be easily repaired
The broken glass peels away at your fingers
Lines that run through the images
The thought to replace barely lingers

Wish
upon a falling star
Wish
on the headlights of each passing car
Wish on the people you know you can believe
Wish on the seasons and the memories you grieve

Wish on your faith that peace will arrive
Wish on the roads on that late night drive

And I wish that I was sitting next to you
wondering what we should do
so I wish at 11:11
and on the moments you introduced me to heaven

Dear Ghost,
My mom asked if I talk to you anymore
I asked her what for
But in her eyes I saw my own break

She wanted to know about the things
that were still uncertain when you were with me
I told her I don't know anymore
I think she knew the breath it would take

We laughed about how prom season was over
I guess she forgot how I went alone
I told her I'm excited for what's in store
Though my voice cracked over talking about you

And to my friends we laugh about your name
Or about the way you dressed or your hair
And I want to scream that it's not fair
And I want to hope you feel the same
Even though my life is fine without you
Even though I don't want you
There's a burn the shape of your name
And I think I will always feel the same
Because that's what love does to you

I'm trying hard not to play the creepy stalker ex-girlfriend
I'm trying hard to realize this is the end
I'm trying hard I promise mom and dad
I'm trying hard not to make you both sad
I'm trying hard to maintain my 4.0
I'm trying hard to just let it all go
I'm trying hard not to worry my old pals
I'm trying hard not be one of those gals
I'm trying hard to reach out again
I'm trying hard to keep it all in one vein
I'm trying hard I'm trying I really am

My hope lingers on my tounge
So I wash it down with the exclamations of being young

Oh I'm oh so young!
I tell them, watching the setting sun

The sun that closes each fleeting day
Full of heartbreak that leads the way

Of youth to a bitter adulthood of joy and play
Of sunny days edged in gray

Still summer comes and goes too quick
Maybe, we think, this year the feeling will stick

But the spring hasn't ended and our eyes are slick
The clock still follows its tick, tick, tick