Not everyone is out to harm you
Not everyone is going to love or even like you
It’s not about them
It’s about you

We were never related by blood,
Yet you loved me like your own.
You were always there,
When everything was dark,
And you offered me a spark
Soon you’ll be gone.
And I dread the days to come.

do you have moments, where you can’t imagine a future?
you’re lying there, staring at the
same walls
same ceilings
same words
with nothing but the same feelings-
empty and pale,
like there’s no reason to go on,
when you can’t even do enough to fail.
the future is coming, but you don’t want to be in it,
can’t imagine yourself in it.
where you just want to stop.
everything.
and just sit there for a while.
maybe not death, as that’s too permanent,
but something close to it.
when you can feel the rope around your neck,
the razor on your wrist,
the way the pills taste.
you can imagine it, and you aren’t sure if it’s what you want,
or just the feelings you imagine it will give you

I crave the escape from the reality my head creates.

we can’t always
be better than
everybody else

but we can
always be better
than ourselves