Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 Aug 9 star
eliana
Who Am I
 Aug 9 star
eliana
I try to be the good girl,
The girl who has it all together,
But I'm not.

I'm the girl crumbling into pieces trying to find herself,
The girl who isn't sure who she is but knows what she has to be,
But that isn't the real me.

The real me wants to escape from that trapped box of everyone's expectations.
It seems impossible.
I want to find me.

But it seems to be the hardest thing that can be.
Who I am is up to me, but you see,
No one seems to understand that part of me.
Being a teenager is hard; you go through so many life-changing situations that change a lot about you. The whole time you go through these things you're trying to find who you really are. This explains how I feel trying to find myself and trying to escape everyone else's expectations.
 Aug 9 star
eliana
HOW
After all these years
After all these  years.
HOW
Do I still feel the same
HOW
After all these years
After all these  years.
NOTHING
Nothing has changed
I almost forgot I was always messed up like this
I wonder
HOW
Have I managed to drown
DROWN
The voices
The pain
HOW
HOW
After all these years
After all these  years.
HOW
Do I still feel the same...
 Aug 9 star
ac
i’ve been telling myself that ive been good for months
i think just pushed it all down
six feet in the ground
and it’s digging itself up right now
i keep staring into the abyss
wondering what im even doing with my life
i sleep to much or not at all
school started monday and im already behind
i wake up, do my make up, and im already exhausted
i say hi to the girlfriend of the guy that im in love with
the same guy i get “reminders” of
i’m torn because he’s not C
but C is everything to me
perfectly
but right now i kinda want to be lonely
what is happening?
read my poem “reminders” and you’ll get the reference
idk what’s happening rn bro
but smth ain’t right
 Aug 9 star
eliana
My Curse
 Aug 9 star
eliana
I've been blessed with this curse to put my thoughts into words
Yet it feels like I'm heartless as i put my heart into this verse
These words tumbling around and round
Never making sense as they beat me down
Curses from blessings
Yet the pain that I've gained from
This game called life
This pain that'll cut sharper, harsher, deeper than
Any Knife
A pain called lessons derived from
These sticks and stones that mold me
Shinning a brighter than bright light for the world over to see
Yet over and over again like Autumn i
Shall fall
Tripped up and caught up in these
Words that i say
Even as they torment me from day to day
I showed you one side now I'll show you the other
As these miscellaneous thoughts branch off to the deepest depths of my mind
Showing a darker side yet to be revealed
Yet has yet to be sealed properly
Trust me when i say I'm offering this once in a life time chance more rare than winning the lottery
To show what has plagued me
From a day to day basis
 Aug 9 star
Lyle
Fake
 Aug 9 star
Lyle
You always look so happy though!

That’s fake
That’s fake
It’s fake
It’s fake
Fake
Fake
 Jul 30 star
Liana
Elders
 Jul 30 star
Liana
They say to respect our elders
But they don't respect the trees hundreds of years old
Tall in the sky
Watching all of us

They say to respect our elders
Yet
They don't respect our mother earth who
Aged rather beautifully
Billions of years more than them
 Jul 30 star
Liana
No one talks about how painful it is
To love someone who wants to die
About the anger that you aren't enough
That they're okay with leaving this world
Leaving you here

We don't talk about
The constant fear
That they might already be gone
That couldn't save them

The terror when they don't answer
Every time
I find myself unable to breathe
Thinking about the blood on the floor
Imagining the rope around their neck
Picturing the empty pill bottle next to their lifeless body
There is so much fear

Please call me
Please tell someone
You cannot be alone like that to end your world

Please call me if you're going to do it
But it will not be for goodbye's
I will not tell you it's alright
I will say that I will ever be able to forgive you
Because I won't
I will only forgive you if you started breathing again
But when you're dead
That's it
You're dead

Yes I would be devastated
Completely and utterly
But that's not all
I would be angry too

2am anxiety attack
3am writing them poems
They're not enough
The words aren't enough
I'm not ******* enough
No one talks about being up at 4am doing research
How to help
Words to give
Grasping thin air for something
Anything
To keep them there

Now it's 5 am
Making lists of ways to make things better
How to make the world more livable
Because they are not allowed to die
6 am still awake
It doesn't matter that I won't get any sleep
I don't care about myself anymore
I don't care about my life
They just need to stay in it
That's all that matters
 Jul 26 star
Liana
Then
 Jul 26 star
Liana
She said she felt bad for my father
Because I wasn't speaking to him anymore

Then she read my poems
People you gotta know what you're talking about before you say ****
 Jul 24 star
ash
siren calling
 Jul 24 star
ash
bare, a beast of all sorts,
the kind, unknown, unnamed,
desire, perhaps, or even the want.

peeling back layers upon layers,
haunting like venom dressed in velvet,
freaky, misdirected, and led upon.

devotion and lust drink from the same glass,
the champagne poured in by the hands that sculpted brass
into silver,
now mistaken for diamond shine
razor sharp, pricking at the slightest touch,
reaching all the way behind to grasp
the thin fiber of reality that separates.

distance barely existing,
trembling hands trying to pull away the curtains
that hide behind the mesh covering the eyes—

like silk over barbed wire,
perfume resembling the stench of blood,
metallic, almost glittering upon a caress.

curling upon the sheets like smoke in a fire grate,
in spirit, in being, in a soul tie so strong,
the red string pulled taut—

circling the fingers, going all the way up the arm,
slithering and coiling like a snake around the neck,
possession lacking in need.

war report disguised as a love note,
signed in lip stain.

warmth where the danger lives,
close to the flames that can destroy whole,
turned into ash, not mere blackened soot—

violet seize amidst grey sample.

rotten, wholly spoilt,
always a dance,
circling around, close—oh so close,
yet so far.

the truth about forever,
which exists in eternity,
for the while the self survives—

cherry-soaked bodies
living below the ransacked lair.
unspoken, the eyes connect,
few faded visions filled with anomalies,

and a step further up ahead.

grip loose, just way too loose,
accept the chances at running,
escaping right after the wisp of contact—

entangled fingers slipping as the light dims,
furthermore, the radio in the very corner
plays the same track from the first ever night—

with or without you,
don’t touch—don’t glance, don’t do.

torn between staying to take away the soul
or leave behind a heart wrapped in a ribbon.

the blackening veins, cinematic mugshot,
before ties around the wrists and eyes up at the skies—

give up—give up—breathe in, let be.

+92, look at me—do you hear it too?
the sound of bells, calling upon all the wanderers,
the bare ones, yet to hold any other.

too generic, exceptionally quiet,
concentric circles of the eyes,
tired of novocaine—

about all that you don’t see,
put the **** away.

solely a white, white lie,
blazing remembral speaks in starlight.

numbing ache around where the fingerprints remain,
tunnel vision, staring right at you,
at the way you move.

the last ticket, the last trip—
no turning back.

dripping cocoa down, round from the ceiling,
the mirrors speaking monstrosity,
reflections sharing a breath—

en route, in the midst of almost,
leaving behind all casualties,

end this trip—
while going down and low,
and back into the graves where we slipped out from.
messy messy messy me
Next page