laura-jessica

Feb 2018

Alessia

Hello my names anxiety
I forgot what trust tastes like
I stopped caring about the world before the world could stop caring about me
I was taught to break myself so others couldn’t break me down
I’ve grown afraid of waking up in the morning
The same way I was afraid to never wake up in the morning

Hello my name is female
I’ve witnessed the girls in my life get cat called by men on the streets before I knew what a cat call was
I had to teach my self what a period was because we don’t talk about those things in school
Because of guys who got grossed about over a women’s ****** the same guys who watched hours of **** before going to bed

Hello my name is 13
But I’m not supposed to tell you that because my age makes me less of myself
Because I can’t know about the world problems before I’m 18, Apparently
Because when you were my age the world wasn’t your problem

Hello my name is queer
I’m scared to tell people because I’ve seen kids abandoned for loving those they love
Because mom and dad make homophobic jokes
Then tell me it’s okay they have gay friends
I’m to afraid to tell a girl I love her because her friends don’t like my type of love

Hello my names society told me I’m not good enough
Because of the people I love
Because of the gender I was born as
Because of the age I am
Because of the mental illness I have
Because being me just isn’t good enough

Hey... my names Alessia
And I’m just trying to be happy

Feb 2018

Eva

Depression

This is not
Something more
Not sadness
No tears that could
Fill up or flood
This is just
Empty
Lacking
Where nothing is
Colour
Just numb
And
Existence.

#depression #sad #empty

Feb 2018

Alessia

From Afar

I watch you from afar
Taking in your features
How u have mole on your left eye
How you stumble on your words
How your eyes shine brighter then any star
And when your thinking hard you look up at the sky

I pay attention to you
Even if I was never worth a second glance in your eyes
But to me your my sun
And like the world I revolve around you

I thought what I felt for you was clearly platonic
But the little things about you made me feel tingles down my spine
And I can't tell you how I really feel so I wrote it poorly in a sonnet
And I'll say I love you a thousand times till you say it back
Even if it lacks everything true

I always watch you from afar
Cause your the one thing that showed me how to love
And you didn't even teach me it yourself
Because what I feel for you cannot be explained in a paragraph of terrible poetry

Feb 2018

JA S-Mine

c h a n g e ?

I wanna change the way I look,
the way I feel,
the way I am.

I've started drawing all over,
my arms,
and legs,
and wrists,
because the blade is no fun.

I'm drinking more water,
clearing my skin,
fixing my appearance.

I get looks,
I get comments,
I get praise.

I do, however,
miss the old me,
that me had more fun.

The old me didn't sleep,
always ate,
never worked out,
played video games,
drew on thier arms,
legs,
face,
body.

The old me is gone,
because everyone else likes,
the new me,
oh so,
very much,
more

laura-jessica Feb 2018

suicide.

the title caught you didn't it?

you see, suicide is like a book.

you don't seem to care about the rising actions such as
self harm, anorexia, self hate.

you only care about the plot.

but, how can you be so concerned about suicide and want it to stop if you can't recognize or care about the signs that lead to it?

if you don't want our books to close early, why do you;

accuse us of faking,
saying we want attention because we talk about our illness,
not give us support and love?

suicide.

still caught your attention.

i feel like this is a blank write, and horridly written :(

Feb 2018

Jessy

(the truth)

I’m happy
(I’m depressed)

I love myself
(I hate myself)

I can’t wait to live my life
(I can’t wait to die)

I am lucky to have my friends
(why do they even like me?)

I have a family who loves me
(and I continue to disappoint them)

I am an excellent student
(I can’t focus in school)

I want to travel the world
(will I even live to do that?)

I’m fine
(I’m not fine)

I’m perfectly okay
(please help me)

#truth #lies #depression #suicide

laura-jessica Feb 2018

objectified

confusion is my main thought.

why did you do this to me?
why me?

my stomach keeps twisting and turning at the
thought of what you do.

you are disgusting.

i want to scream and cry,
but i just remember you.

calling me beautiful and such.

you are sick.

why me?
why me?
why me?

why would you, how could you?

i haven't met you,
i haven't spoken a word to you,

and yet you leave me here numb.

feeling left without pureness,
left feeling unholy.

am i an object?

am i an object you can objectify?