Slumbering on and off
I must have dozed into a side street
My memory on a go slow
Having vacated the premises
Beads rolled and filled the gaps
Settling into the spaces in my head
Overflowing into folds of the pillow
Their circular bodies probing my cheeks
Pulling faces at me in disturbance
The light switch to my brain remained off
The beads multiplied, the pillow
Like a giant bead bean bag
Impacted its air bag mode
Wham....I was awake
Not knowing for a moment quite what day it was

There were so many faces
Faces recognised and known so well
It was bitter sweet; a setting for
The last look, gathered up in best
Frocks with fine hair and cloth

A head full of alcohol like a wrecking ball  
Pivotal, with eyes watching as she set
Alight her feelings, burning bright and loud

We knew and understood the intensity
But were guarded.  Young and fragile
Was her step away from this family
Raw emotion careering and spilling
Outward, her head could take no more

We took up the night, our souls leaning
Laughter setting aside reality for now
Early hours confronting us, we stayed
Awake and sat round savouring our last
Thoughts; holding on to one another

Some will never blink in time with us
Or look for us once more.  The grain
Slowly slipping into tomorrow
Through the tunnel of night

The building becomes sad in its silence
Un-trodden carpet quiet, rooms release
Their challenges replaced by emptiness
Stripped bare, waiting to meet a new voice

The finality beckons strength, stillness
Of emotion.  Calm us will you?  Stretch out
With me to face another gangway.  Throw a
New ball so I can catch and return …….
Reaching out!

It took a while

I was just about to shut it down, instantly
I know you’re in another realm, of sleep perhaps


Your body language apologetic curling yourself
Into the soft leather, fragile of mind

It is grim, a lake pooling in your eye, personal view looking
Through blurred angles, the years ahead for you are now, without interim

It will be temporary, the messy uncertainty
Clamouring and digesting your escape

I know you don’t single out this continuation
To rule, I don’t blame you for that

I wonder if you could step out from your inner turmoil
Use the learning chapter, working between the lines of life

The full stops to become commas... of pause
Not trying for perfection

You’ll never make it

To strive, for recognition

An assembly point for thought
Triumphed within an open page

Paper evidence of unspoken verse
Retrieved from the place behind this heart

Do you mind?

Don’t look over my shoulder at my vulnerability
Private stance is mine

Do not mock as I turn the page
A personal preview of this unlocked memory

Back of my neck, prickling
Anticipating on the spot reaction

Young, ill at ease
Crying from the yard

Hiding the scars
Don’t rush away the memories, a deluge

When time was so limited
Become brave

Force open the private recess
Cobwebbed and masked by dust

Speak clearly, not from mumbling
Mouth, I need to………….. know

I am blemished

So glad to be alongside you
Reunited, forgotten, forgiven.....now ribbon tied

Can we bury?
It would seem not......but wait and remember

Deceived by the dark
Under dressed for the occasion

Battered suitcase dragged and kicked open
Essays of remembrance

Headlines screaming for discussion
Released for a while

Obeyed and tidied
Press down and close the rusty catches

My new day transcribed here
I don’t mind, lean on my shoulder

See my vulnerability
It makes me strong

Space to make change an indelible part of life

Encourage the stagnant side to enliven its speech
Flourishes of energy folding in on one another
Pecking, their beaks marking time with biting tongues
Sqeamish reminders of circus clowns vying for laughs
Staring eyes and red painted smiles freakishly scaring
The innocent rosy cheeked wondrous audience
Clapping the skin from their fingers while querelous
Adults sit bored hoping to borrow a new time zone
Spot checking the interest of those encroaching their space

Space to make change an indelible part of life

To fool the viewer of the showcased goods before their
Sell by date, when holding onto stagnation pales the hand of change
Quell the nausea that preludes sickness leaving that vile taste
Rancour alongside a grinning mass of stained teeth borrows
Sweating it out with flailing words of ignorant abandonment
Scorching hot tears racing one another, dripping from lowered
Eyelashes, coaxing the seeping colour coated debris to release
To wash away the dirt, leaving streaks of diluted aftermath

Space to make chnage an indelible part of life

Funny, how the thing you love turns sour
When its back is broken and the rug pulled
Clear, exposing hard surfaces to deal with

The staircase leads to the decision maker or
The messenger; doling out the ‘nothing personal’
You see, we’re expendable, wrecked through loyalty

It didn’t work despite extreme effort; when they
Look at us anger wells up spitting, encircling
Their heads

A glimmer of something like understanding
Scrapes their tongues, doesn’t quite meet the
Mark or hit the spot and sticks in their mouths

We knew before they did

See through

Substance missing

Finished

Standing she rocked to one side
Destabilised pockets of the room swayed needing time to catch up

Stepping out proved challenging
Reaching forward the floor shot into view asking to be met

A shower of stillness would be welcomed right now
Would settle the angles rattling her

The floor is rough
It needs her touch to quell the sway