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L Sep 2015
How do you commit suicide without hurting the ones around you?
L May 2015
Kiss away the pressure residing in my lungs
L Jun 2015
Even if it were possible,
I wouldn't have been enough.
I wouldn't have been what they wanted for you.
Who am I kidding though?
It couldn't have been possible.
Just another reason to end it.
I'm too literal for proper poetry
L May 2015
You make me nauseous. ******* sick. I am disgusted. Revolted.
How did I ever? ****, how did I ever?
L Feb 2015
And while we lay here
weeping and fighting
for our love,
*they win.
**
Leigh
L Jan 2015
And for the first time in months,
I think about death.
L Apr 2015
You can see me, but why can't you ******* look at me?
L Apr 2015
You pull harder,
they push further.
L Mar 2015
The sun moves from behind the clouds
and all is right in the world
L Mar 2015
I'm afraid to watch you stumble and fall because I know I won't be there to bandage your scraped knees
L Dec 2015
What did I do to deserve the hell you put me through?
L Apr 2015
My mind desperately tries to forget, but my heart painfully holds on
L Apr 2015
Now it's your promises that mean nothing
L Apr 2015
Try to please too much and you'll lose who you really are
L Feb 2016
You became the person you feared
Say hello to your step brother for me.
He's in the mirror.
L Apr 2014
I wish you knew the 2 AM me.

The 2 AM me isn't afraid to speak her mind,
she doesn't hide behind sighs and eye rolls.
Her deepest fear?
Sure, here it is on a timeline.

The 2 AM me is an open book,
she'll tell you whatever you want to know.
Her darkest secret?
Sure, here it is in full detail.

The 2 AM me isn't a coward,
she doesn't wait for you to bring up tough subjects.
Her haunting thoughts?
Sure, here they are on display.

The 2 AM me is full of love,
she'll keep telling you "I love you" until you grow sick of it.
Her translucent hopes?
Sure, here they are in moonlight.


...The 2 AM me isn't me at all.
She's someone else completely.
She waits patiently to be set free.
why, oh why, did I stop meditating?

**
Leigh
L Jun 2015
You are a budding Casanova
A Brett Ashley in the making
Rhett Butler would be proud
Daisy Buchanan might bat her eyelashes
George Wickham would tip his hat
That's all you ever wanted
To be wanted
To be "loved"
You won't get it by chasing every person who enters your life
It doesn't work that way
It isn't that easy
But how would you know?
For a mayfly friend

**
Leigh
L Apr 2015
You watch the clock tick.
You watch my fingertips as they glide across my lips.
You watch people walk by.
You watch my spine expand as I reach across the table.
You watch clouds cover the sun.
You watch my eyes as they shift and glance your way.
You watch people eat.
You watch my neck as I move my hair to the side.
You watch people speak.
You watch my lips stretch over my teeth as I slowly smile.
You watch people interact.
You watch me fall for your eyes
   and do not blink.
Posting some drafts and other poems posted elsewhere

**
Leigh
L Apr 2015
Two steps forward, two steps back
We watch each other fall
Me, into waiting arms
You, into the Black Dog
Which will make it out alive?
**
Leigh
L Mar 2015
I'm tired of being the strong one,
having to hide mascara stained tissues at the bottom of the trash.
For once, I'd like to be the one with
a head on a shoulder
crying over nothings.
When do the strong get to be the weak?
**
Leigh
L May 2015
I used to think, darlin', you never did nothin'
But you were always up to somethin'
Always had a run in, yeah
I got to think those days are comin' to get ya
Now no body want to protect ya
They only want to forget ya


You'll be on my mind
Don't give yourself away
To the weight of love
The Black Keys

**
Leigh
L Sep 2015
You push and pull and grasp at air, nothing.
Who are you looking for?
What is it you want?
Why are you never satisfied?
Insatiable.
Always, always, always.
I wish I was dead

**
Leigh
L May 2015
Water is wet
The sky is blue
You are beautiful
The earth is round
Gravity holds us to it
You are breathtaking
Oxygen fills our lungs
The ocean is deep
You are mine
Dumb

**
Leigh
L Feb 2014
Is love the yellow roses you gave me for my birthday?
Is love the way my heart stops when you say my name?
Is love the smile you flash when I wink at you?
Is love the heartfelt letter you wrote me?
Is love the cheesy valentines from tumblr that we send?
Is love the way you curled around me in the night?
Is love the midnight FaceTime calls we've had?
Is love the heart shaped papers covering the school hallways?
Is love the thrill I get whenever you call me "baby"?
*Is love what I'm feeling?
there are so many types of love that I've been feeling lately...
love of friendship, love of lovers, and love of life.
happy valentines day, you lovely poets.
**
Leigh
L Sep 2015
Do I amuse you, dear? Would you think me queer if while standing beside you I opted instead to disappear?
St Vincent

**
Leigh
L Aug 2014
"It's like you're the only people who exist."

I can't say it isn't true...
She is a light
at end of the tunnel,
shining in the endless dark.



"It's like you can never be apart from each other."

I can't say it isn't true...
She is oxygen
in the air,
holding fragile life together.



"It's like you're in love."*

Oh, I can't say it isn't true...
She is everything
to me,
loving wholly and unconditionally.
Not very good, but another for R.

**
Leigh
L Dec 2013
three words
asked by a sympathetic teacher
"Are you okay?"

three words
whispered by a coward
"Yes..."

a knowing glance
   shaking eye contact
a lump in each throat
   reddening cheeks

"I'm fine."

another lie added
to the ever-growing list
titled
Denials
I've been adding a lot of quotes to help you understand...
L Nov 2013
sitting in the hell we call "school"
and my thoughts
start to drift.
I begin to ask myself:

what would your life be like if he hadn't been a part of it?

I break into a sweat.
my hands grow colder,
along with my heart.
I dread the thought.

what if you were never friends?

the thoughts grow worse.
I think about the habits I have,
the things I've picked up from him (and he from me)
over our 16 years together.

what if he died tomorrow?

I'd feel it.
surely I would.
there would be an undeniable ache,
right there in the center of my being.

what if he died and you didn't tell him I love you?

I'd die.
I'd end it all.
what reason would I have to live,
if I didn't have him?

the
      thoughts
                take
                      over.
L Sep 2014
I am moving with the wind
at a pace you cannot keep up with.
Sailing free, no holding back now.
I'm soaring,
high above the clouds and earth and destruction of the heart.
I'm escaping on these wings
and there is nothing you can do
to hold my feet against the ground...
I am flying
higher and higher and higher.
Feeling inspired this beautiful morning

**
Leigh
L Nov 2014
You always come to mind
when winter rolls around.
I can't help but to recall the time
we spent burning marshmallows
by the bonfire in your backyard
or how your mother would make
hot chocolate and beckon to
our hiding place underneath your comforter.
I remember the winter of freshmen year,
after we had grown up and apart.
Out of jealousy that was unnecessary,
my heart ruined everything.
It took so long to get Us
back to normal...
Nearly two years.
Now here we are,
closer by heart than by body.
A little bit older, a little bit colder.
Let's see what this winter brings.
I've tried and tried to rewrite this and work it out...
This is what I've decided was "worthy".
For Scott. Welcome back, bud.

**
Leigh
L May 2015
My heart is still cracked and you say you understand but you don't not really and I wish I could make you but I couldn't hurt anyone like that I wish you knew I wish I could tell you I wish I wasn't afraid I wish I wish I wish I loved you as much as you say you love me but I'm afraid to let you in and I'm afraid to give you the power to hurt me because last time I did that I was fatally wounded and I can't bleed out again my heart can't take it
L Jan 2014
I'd be 6 feet under

heart in my throat
body in the earth
spirit in the sky
soul in the melody...
produced by my very hands
accidentally?
maybe
on purpose?
completely
L Mar 2016
There surrounded
hungry, fast, frenzied
Here alone
loving, affectionate, desperate
Leigh
L May 2015
You make me happy. Really happy. The kind of happiness I can feel in the center of my chest, a warmth that just sits there and grows whenever you call me baby or say that you love me. I always want to be with you, even when I'm on my period and don't even want to leave my house. There is nothing I enjoy more than just laying around with you and simply being with you. your smile makes me smile. I could listen to your laugh all day. I like everything that differentiates you from me. I like that you play video games and soccer and that you watch all these shows and movies on Netflix. I like that you listen to 90s alternative rock because I've never heard of 95% of the songs and artists you've introduced me to. With differences, there are similarities and I like them just as much. I like that our sense of humor is so alike. It's like we're always in an inside joke and no one else knows what the hell we're laughing at. I like that you say cheeky things at ten at night and seven in the morning and two in the afternoon.

God, I just... I like you. I might love you. I'm falling for you and ****, I hope you catch me.
For B

**
Leigh
L May 2015
But I do.
I feel the same way and God ******, I want to tell you.
But how would you feel about that?
Would you think that I'm saying it just to soothe your fears and vulnerability?
Would you think that I'm being sympathetic and saying it out of guilt?
I'm not.
I promise.
I love you.
I want to tell you

**
Leigh
L Apr 2015
"We human beings spend our whole lives chasing after love. So when you find yourself in the extraordinarily rare position of being passionately loved in return by your beloved, please do not waste precious time worrying about whether their genitals are the right shape."
**
Leigh
L Feb 2014
The people I work with are unique in every possible way.
They're all like little divided pieces of myself...
and when I told them that, not one of them even blinked.

"That's deep, man. I know what you mean... I feel the same way."

Finally, acceptance.

They don't judge the way I speak or act or think.
They even enjoy the poems I write and leave on the board.
They accept each other for everything that they are.

--
Jourdan is living in anxiety and takes ten minute smoke breaks to smooth
that rough edge.
("I really should quit, but it reminds me of my dad.")

Chris is a dancer and dances in the bus station when no one can see
that elegant movement.
("Yes, I'm gay, in case you were wondering.")

Myranda is intelligent and I tell her that everyday just to make her smile
that beautiful smile.
("Can I leave my textbooks up here?")

Becky is a singer and sings with me whenever good music plays over
that old speaker.
("Hi I'm Becky and I can sing your order for you if you'd like!")

Danny is practically a comedian and the jokes he throws around are
that ******* funny.
("Stuuuu? Why are you making chocolate pudding?")

Brandon is a flirt and he's constantly coming up with reasons to come to
that front lobby.
("Hey Leigh! Can you put this tip in my waistband?")
--

All of these people are so different, yet so alike.
We get along just fine.
I couldn't ask for anyone better.
I know I'm annoying my friends with all this talk of work,
but I'm enjoying myself too much NOT to.
L Jun 2014
Your love fills all the white space
on the blank canvas of this life.
Another for R.
I love you more each day.
Sorry I get stuck on a single sentence and cannot seem to write you a full poem.

**
Leigh
L Apr 2014
I washed my bed sheets before you came over
in hopes that if they were clean,
your scent would linger once you left.

And now that you've gone?

They smell like sunlight on a spring day.

They smell like love in the morning.

So I burrow myself next to your heart and count the time that's passed.
Wonderful...
They smell like
*you.
kinda sappy and not very good...
happy anniversary, luv.
<3

**
Leigh
L Sep 2014
In my dreams,
I write poetry on her skin.
The pen moves gently and with compassion.
Words of love join hands,
waltzing across
her collarbones
   her waist
      her hips
covering her entirely.
I take my time, marking her arms with lyrics of adoration to cover
scars of self hatred.
"You are so beautiful."
She cries.
"This is beautiful."
I smile.
*"Oh, my love... the best have yet to be written."
Written quite a lot today...
another for R.
(surprise surprise)
I love you.

**
Leigh
L Sep 2015
"What's wrong with me?" and "What's wrong with what I did?" have two separate meanings... Where does your question fall?
TH

**
Leigh
X
L Aug 2015
X
I had my fears
You let them out
Now I wrap myself around you
like a blanket full of doubt
old draft
For Ray, the one I knew a year ago

**
Leigh
L Jun 2015
Black cloud crossed my mind
Blue mist round my soul
Feel so suicidal
Even hate my rock 'n' roll
Wanna die yeah wanna die
If I ain't dead already
Ooh girl you know the reason why
The Beatles

An excerpt from one of my favorite songs

**
Leigh
Yes
L Mar 2015
Yes
Stay a little longer --
10:30, 11...
No, I'm not tired --
11:30, 12...
Officially, then --
12:30, 1...
I guess we should sleep --
Zzz...
Having a bit of fun with writing

**
Leigh
Yes
L Mar 2014
Yes
It's taken a long time to let myself freely love.
For a while, I didn't believe love even existed...

But my God, do I love you.

I could go on and on and on,
but words could never be enough.

I've only been able to come up with a single sentence:

**Your name pulses as steady as a heartbeat in my thoughts.
And that, my love, is why you are my muse.
You
L Dec 2015
You
A child stuck in a rotting body.
A life built on manipulation and ***. An addict of lust.
An attention-starved fool.
You
L Sep 2014
You
Sometimes
You let your walls crumble
And your age-old
Soul
Is let out of it's confinement
Wrote something about myself for a change...

**
Leigh
You
L Feb 2016
You
And you're a liar, at least all of your friends are
And so am I, just typically drowned in my car
It's my party and I'll cry to the end
You must try harder than kissing all of my friends

It takes a bit more, yeah it takes a bit more than you
It takes a bit more, yeah it takes a bit more than you

You're alive, at least as far as I can tell you are
And so am I, you beat me down and then we're back to my car
And it's so ironic how it's only been a year
And it's not my fault that you ****** everybody here
You // The 1975

Not mine
But I wish it was
(One pronoun tweak in that last line)

Leigh
L Apr 2016
Do you know what it's like to die alive?
Next to Normal
L Apr 2015
Lovin' so deeply, I'm in over my head
Over My Head // Alabama Shakes

"God, do I."

**
Leigh
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