Stare out the window.
He gently squeezes my knee.
Just keep staring.
He changes into 3rd gear.
Pretend not to hear him ask if I'm okay.
He squeezes my thigh instead.
Cant pretend now.
His eyes are gentle, searching.
Small smile, shrug.
He leans in for a kiss.
Turn back away.
His hand slowly lifts away.

This is everyday.
He patiently waits for the mood to change.
This is going to be everyday.
He cant see the fresh cuts under denim.
This is his everyday.
He wonders where he went wrong.
This is not his fault.
His love will run out.
So maybe it wont be everyday.
He will get sick of caring for the sick.

Pained effort in reaching out.
His smile is audible.
Lace fingers between his.
One, two, three, his secret signal.
Theres a lump growing.
He is oblivious to the tears.
Turn back to the window.
His lips warm against white knuckles.
Resist the urge to scream.
He cannot hear the restless soul cry.
Find too much interest in trees zooming by.
I think I must sleep alone tonight.

It was during times where we would fight over the smallest thing,
That I knew I loved you,
Because at that time I wanted to scream and cry,
But I also wanted to wrap you up in a tight hug,
And whisper how much I love you