at 3 i am a girl
all I want is to grow up to be a princess
Hopefully with a Prince Charming and a castle

At 5 I got asked what my ambition was
Even then I wanted to be a princess
But not with a castle, I already knew it wasn't going to come true

At 7, I got asked what my ambition was
Then, I changed my mind
I wasn't going to be a princess, it was all in my head.

At 10, I decided I was going to become a doctor
I had watched my close kin bleed out to death in an operation theatre
And I wanted to be a doctor who saved every life that came knocking on my door

At 13, I was too caught in the middle of my friends problems
I spent my days healing broken hearts and listening to stories that I forgot that I had my own stories
Just no one to speak them out to

At 16, I wanted to be a psychiatrist
I was willing to take on the problems of the whole universe
And then I realized the weight was too much for me to bear

At 18, I want to be a person. I want to feel things
I don't want to store them in a box and throw the key away
I don't want to hold my tears back
I don't want to live for anyone around me
I want to live for myself
And there's nothing else I'd rather be because
No one does me better than me

"nobody wants broken things...

so who would want a broken person?"

—  she thought.

He told me his love was like a religion: his heart a god and his embrace a prayer. He told me he'd shed some light on my dim world…

He didn't know that God has never been on my side and the stars had never aligned to answer my prayers. He didn't know that I liked the mind games I played and that a love like his was one to keep distanced.

Like young lovers—where too much talking shortens the romance
and where it too was never worth the risk to say goodbye.
The fire no longer burns the same but I still want to
hear what your eyes scream.

And my problem is that loneliness and I are best friends;
when I go outside it is with
the birds,
the clouds,
the chalk within this pavement
where I have my own cheap conversations.

We can pass through the days like a series of jump-cuts
and nothing between us changes,
and we lay together as victims of this dark road,
listening to the trickling of rainfall down our windows
coming into our world where we no longer live in.