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366 · Oct 2023
Transmogrification
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2023
Faith …
the capacity
to believe

Belief …
the odyssey
of proof

Proof …
the embodiment
of reason

Reason …
the arbiter
of truth

(Beaupre: October, 2023)
365 · Sep 2021
Monument Valley
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2021
To write and wander
among the spires

Her mystery ancient,
each look inspired

The sand the measure
of all between

What’s in my soul
—and unforeseen

(Monument Valley Utah: September, 2021)
363 · Feb 2017
Still To Run
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2017
Your page now short on substance,
  yet colorful the rhyme

The words used in abundance,
  where lesser might define

Intention slave to beauty,
  all meaning zero sum

Pageantry lost in the wind,
—your blood left still to run

(Grantham New Hampshire: February, 2017)
362 · Mar 2017
Wings Of A Prayer
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2017
A song more than a verse,
  thoughts more than they say

A wish lost in the fall,
  recaptured in May

Love more than a feeling,
  all heaven to share

Last word redelivered,
—on wings of a prayer

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2017)
362 · Feb 2023
Life Ring
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2023
Trapped in the moment
escaping with rhyme
Words to my rescue
—time after time

(Dreamsleep: February, 2023)
362 · Jul 2023
Itinerantur
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2023
Travel …
strange bedfellows
made of us all
Crossing
the threshold
hesitancy stalls
Calling us
forward
the moment attacked
Hiding
our fortunes
—the future on track

(Dreamsleep: June, 2023)
362 · Jun 2022
Silencing The Fire
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2022
Released from
the inferno
Tongue of Satan
to betray
Saving words
from his fury
Muting the serpent
—today

(Dreamsleep: June, 2022)
361 · Nov 2017
To Haunt And Cajole
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2017
The mind is the ghost of our being,
  its voice left to haunt and cajole

(Villanova Pennsylvania: November, 2017)
      Collaboration with Martina Lynch
361 · Apr 2017
Distant Thunder
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2017
We were there,
  but we weren’t

We took part,
  and we didn’t

There was war,
  with all affected

There was death,
  and some objected

There was music,
  we got lost in

Assassinations,
  left us frozen

Alienation,
  drove us inward

Graduation,
  for beginners

Half a century,
  now forgotten

Ten short years,
  in time begotten

Raged a storm,
  of hope and wonder

Alive today,
—a distant thunder

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2017)
361 · May 2017
Their Contrail
Kurt Philip Behm May 2017
Try as I might,
  to hide from the words

Distant and fleeting,
  they still can be heard

The nouns are a kite,
  lone verb as the tail

Flying within me,
  my heart their contrail

(Villanova Pennsylvania: May, 2017)
360 · Jul 2018
Veracity's Child
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2018
There’s a great luxury
  in telling the truth

A richness verbatim
  no lies to refute

A strength of conviction
  beyond substance and style

Through the ages adopted
  —veracity’s child

(Villanova Pennsylvania: July, 2018)
360 · Dec 2016
The Fires Burn
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2016
Can you understand  
  beyond thinking

Can you know more than
  your mind can learn

Can you overflow
  without leaking

Can you warm beyond
  the fires burn

(Villanova Pennsylvania: December, 2016)
360 · Dec 2016
Last Orphan Of The Truth
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2016
In the middle—the center,
  a bullseye did hide

Its heart bleeding red,
  to target the lies

It cried out for justice,
  it cried out in pain

Until an arrow struck deeply,
  truth firmly ingrained

Its point forced its power,
its shaft driving home

A message of hope,
into falsehood atoned
  
And deep in your memory,
  a last orphan screams

Renamed in the vengeance,
—rebirthed in this dream

(Villanova Pennsylvania: December, 2016)
360 · Aug 2016
A = C
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2016
The Poetry of Philosophy,
The Philosophy of Truth,
A equals C,
—'Carmina Veritatis'

(Villanova Pennsylvania: August, 2016)
360 · Jan 2019
To Leapfrog All Paradox
Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2019
Are you a ****** being
  if you choose to remain celibate

Are you famous or forgotten
  if you live in a cave

Are you democrat or republican
  if you’re never to vote

Are you black or white
  in the eyes of the blind

Are you young or old
  in the heart of a child

Are you rich or poor
  when everything’s gone

Are you healthy or sick
  when the gallows claim you

Are you guilty or innocent
  when the crime is absolved

Are you friend or foe
  as the last man to fall

Are you committed or unsure
  when the questions retract

Can you find what’s been hidden
  with the object removed

Can you cry out in silence
  when the noise overuns

Can you travel in place
  to unknown destinations

Can you swear to the Lord
  with all prophecy in doubt

Can you still love your children
  when no longer their father

Can you leapfrog all paradox
   —to find your way home

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2015)
359 · Jul 2021
Shallow Grave
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2021
Blanketing the curse
of separation

Distance covers memory
—to sleep inside the pain

(Dramsleep: July, 2021)
358 · Dec 2023
Rod Serling Blues
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2023
Of the many cures
—there is no cure

(Dreamsleep: December, 2023)
356 · Mar 2022
Beset
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2022
Genetics,
our cruelest mistress
the herald’s phantom
In fated shadow
a birthmark staining
—our darkest pall

(Dreamsleep: March, 2022)
356 · Sep 2016
Death's Quota Flying High
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2016
The flowers all have scattered,
  borrowed feelings shout aloud

Mock funeral of celebration,
  grief false beneath their shrouds

The mourning congregation,
  to the tavern marched in step

A ruse to the departed,
  with each toast his memory wept

His friends then hugged his enemies,
  his wife and girlfriend kissed

Through the glass a raven watches,
  taking names without a miss

As ‘last call’ is shouted boldly,
  and all glasses drained of lies

Two wings beat out a roll call,
—death’s quota flying high

(Villanova Pennsylvania: September, 2016)
356 · Aug 2016
Love's Reprieve
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2016
Inspiring you to write your own,
  my words fell silent
  your heart to roam

Creating space for thoughts to breathe,
  new feelings await
  my loves reprieve

(Villanova Pennsylvania: August, 2016)
355 · Sep 2019
A Distant Cry
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2019
Losing all faith
in miracles

His wishes went to
live astray

Where hope becomes a
distant cry

Lost memories
—in the wind

(Dreamsleep: September, 2019)
355 · Feb 2017
Times Refusal
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2017
Youth takes my hand and holds me back,
  as old age points the way

Unwilling yet to leave this Spring,
  as Winter calls my name

The image in the mirror fresh,
  the one my eyes now see

Of Lochinvar and Lancelot,
   in dreamlike fantasy

The children see me older though,
  their children older still

My spouse afraid I can’t accept,
  what time and seasons will

I hold on tight to wings that splay,
  o’er fields both green and gold

And shun the backstairs of my fate,
—refusing to get old

(Trumbull Connecticut: February, 2017)
354 · Dec 2016
Threatening Kobold
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2016
Escaping the prose,
  I hid in the verse

My mind to compose,
  instead of converse

Defying description,
  I sang through the notes

And placed my inscriptions,
in lyrical rote

I chose to hear music,
  over reasons again

To dine with the mystics,
  where forever begins

And when forcing my pen,
  back to stories untold

The Muse starts to darken,
—threatening Kobold

(Villanova Pennsylvania: December, 2016)
354 · Dec 2024
Calling Forth
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2024
Etching my name immortal
the words when left my pen
Take on a new perspective
beyond both me and them

Etching all time eternal
the future is renamed
Calling forth beyond true north
— my destiny reclaimed

(Dreamsleep: December, 2024)
353 · Oct 2018
The Flames Dance
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2018
Saturated in writer fluid,
lost feelings self ignite

Inebriate of a time distilled,
drunk in the burning light

Memories aging 100 proof,
the flames all dance alone

Memories aging 100 proof,
—this fire now my home

(Plane To Las Vegas: January, 2018)
353 · Apr 2022
Last Vial
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2022
Draining all there was to say,
he hemorrhaged one more poem
Last vial of his history,
whose burden now atoned

With final drops to say adieu,
the past and future dead
His last tomorrow here today
—and time no longer bled

(Dreamsleep: April. April 2022)
352 · Mar 2023
Minor Plus Est
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2023
Using the simple
to state the sublime

Syllables shortened
—magic refined

(Dreamsleep: March, 2023)
351 · Apr 2019
Prisoner Of Disguise
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2019
The words flock together
  and stretch on the frame

Their meaning runs over,
  still wet from the pain

The canvas is porous,
  the easel maligned

The curtains blow outward,
  faces calling in mime

The streets all a-chatter,
   it was Paris in spring

And striving to look busy,
  the most important of things

Looking back at my window,
  above the tannery so high

A shadow stares back
  —and I flee in disguise

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
351 · Oct 2022
Untying The Ribbon
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2022
The Poetry of time
its present sublime
Each moment by degree
untethered reminds

The Poetry of time
forever refined
Rebirthing the constant
—our essence defined

(Dreamsleep: October, 2022)
350 · Jan 2023
Back Alleys
Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2023
If some is good
more is better
Less is threatened
all enslaved

If more is reasoned
less is questioned
Good intentions
—hell repaved

(Dreamsleep: January, 2023)
350 · Dec 2024
Bereft & Begone
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2024
Like squeezing and gripping
a handful of sand
Your love dropped through
the crevices unrhymed

Defining our feelings
with each orphaned word
Lost in the random
—abandon of time

(Dreamsleep: December, 2024)
350 · Dec 2016
Convicted To Silence
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2016
Political correctness,
—prison of the new millennium

(Villanova Pennsylvania: December, 2016)
350 · Apr 2024
Eddie's Gift (unedited)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2024
Chapter One: The Awkward Encounter

It was September, 1972, and the fall semester had just started.  Tonight was the first day of class.  I should clarify that as evening instead of day because this was night school.  I was a student majoring in English and Philosophy at Saint Joseph’s University in Philadelphia.

Only two weeks ago, I had moved into an old Victorian apartment building across the street from the University Field House at 54th St. and Woodland Avenue. Everything in Philadelphia is referenced as the intersection of two streets or thoroughfares.  Saint Joe’s was always referred to as being at 54th Street and City Line Avenue.  My apartment was a ramshackled old building in the middle of a black neighborhood.  I was the only white resident in the old three- story apartment building, and my apartment was on the second floor facing front. Every one of my new neighbors treated me great. There was a Baptist Church just to the left of my building and every morning at 8 they held services.  I never needed an alarm to get up in the morning because the singing and ***** music coming through the windows and walls were a reliable wake-up call.

I was working days in an Arco (Atlantic Refining) gas station about 15 miles away in North Hills Pennsylvania.  This station also rented U-Haul trucks, and my job was to pump gas and take care of the truck and trailer rentals as the owner of the station, Bob, was busy with mechanic work.  This worked well for me because between gas fill ups and truck rentals I got to sit in the office and finish my schoolwork.

Since moving back to Philadelphia from State College Pa., where I had been a student, all I brought with me was my most prized possession — a 1971 750 Honda.  I had customized it with café-racer accessories from Paul Dunstall because in those days you couldn’t buy a bike that looked like it belonged on a racetrack like you can today.  You had to build it.

I worked at the station five days a week (Mon – Fri) from 9:00 a.m. until 5:00 p.m.  Then I hopped on my bike and headed back to my apartment to quick shower and change and then walk across the street to campus and hopefully make my first class by 6:00 p.m. On days when I got stuck in traffic or couldn’t leave at exactly 5, I would go straight to class wearing my Arco jumper with the smell of high-octane gasoline going with me.

Tonight, I was sitting alone on the first floor of Villiger Hall which was where my third level Shakespeare course was supposed to be held.  It was almost 6, and I was still the only one in the room — but not for long.  All of a sudden, I heard a high-pitched voice giving orders: “Yes, Dad, this IS the room.  Just push me in and drop me off.”

And that’s exactly what happened. A kindly older gentleman in his late fifties or early sixties pushed his son into the room. I say pushed because his son was in a wheelchair, and he parked him right next to me.  This made me very uncomfortable, and I actually thought about getting up and moving to the other side of the room, but my mother had raised me better than that. The boy in the wheelchair was in a full body brace with a special neck harness to keep his head upright.
If I had been uncomfortable before, I was beyond that now.  We both sat there in silence as the big industrial clock on the front wall ticked 6:02.  It was then that a proctor rushed into the room and wrote on the blackboard in chalk: “THIS CLASS HAS BEEN MOVED TO THE BARBELIN BUILDING, ROOM 207.

Chapter Two: Time To Move

As soon as the proctor had finished writing on the board, I saw this as my chance to escape.  I grabbed my bookbag and started to bolt for the door.  I only got halfway to freedom when I heard the loudest and most commanding voice come out of the *******’s body … “All Right Moose, Let’s Move!

I couldn’t help but hear myself saying (to myself) … “The ******* Really Can Talk.”  I was surprised, blown away, and his voice had frozen me in place.

“All right Moose, let’s get this show on the road.  Do you know where the Barbelin Building is up on the hill?”  I told him I did, and he said … “Put your book bag on the back of the wheelchair so you can push me up the hill before we miss too much class.” Again, his voice had a commanding effect on my actions and in robot fashion I put my bag on the back of his chair, grabbed the two push handles, spun his chair to the right and headed out the door. I was careful not to touch him directly because I didn’t know if what he had was catchy.

As I headed to the stairway to go down the 6 steps leading to outside, I heard that voice again … “No, not that way, toward the elevator” as he pointed off to the left with an arm that was not much bigger than my fingers. “The elevator key is between my legs.  Reach in and get it and then put it in the key slot and we can take the elevator down.”

                      THE KEY WAS BETWEEN HIS LEGS!

At this point, I was totally disoriented but had fallen under his spell.  I took a deep breath, reached between his legs, and found the key.  I then put it in the semi-circular keyhole and turned it to the right.  “Good, he said, it should come quickly, and we’ll be outta here.”

The problem is it didn’t come.  Seconds felt like minutes and minutes like hours as we waited for the elevator door to open. Finally, after an excruciatingly long time the elevator door opened and standing in front of us was the last thing I expected to see. It was another ******* in a wheelchair being pushed by a healthy student about my age.
As they tried to make their way out into the hall the ******* I was pushing said … “Don’t move!  Don’t let them out! And then he said … “I don’t know who you are or where you think you’re going, but this school’s only big enough for one ******* — and that’s me. For seven years I’ve been the resident ******* at St. Joe’s.  The next time I go to use this elevator and you have it *******, my big friend behind me is going to kick your measly friend’s ***.”

By now, I was in a kaleidoscope wrapped inside a time warp spinning at the speed of light. I had never been around anyone who seemingly had so little and acted so grand.

We made it up the hill that night in time to hear Professor Burke say … “Be prepared on Thursday (our next class) to talk about your favorite Shakespeare play and why.”

As I wheeled him toward his next class which also happened to be mine — we were both English majors —he reached out with a tiny hand and said: “My name’s Eddie, what’s yours.”


Chapter Three: So Different Yet So Alike

For the next fifteen months we were inseparable on Tuesday and Thursday’s nights.  We adjusted our Spring course selections to make sure we took the same classes.  Eddie was taking two courses each semester and I was taking four. It was a real struggle for him to take notes, but luckily, he had what many would call a photographic memory.

Many weekends he would visit me in my meager apartment, and we would listen to Van Morrison and the Hollies until the early hours of the morning. Eddie had two good friends named Steve and Ray who would drive him back and forth from my apartment.  My motorcycle wasn’t an option, although we fantasized about how we MIGHT be able to rig something up so he could ride on the back.  Eddie was a magnet and drew everyone into his circle.  He had defied the odds and not let the polio that he contracted at 4 dominate his life.  He slept in an iron lung because it was hard for him to breathe while lying down.

Eddie was bigger than life and bigger than ANY of the obstacles that tried to take him down.  Many times, I tried to imagine myself in his situation, but it was impossible. God had given Eddie a special power, and it allowed him to leverage the people and circumstances around him to make it through. I noticed early on that Eddie lived his life vicariously through the lives of others that he would have liked to have been.

Let’s say that my backround was at least colorful and unconventional.  I had been on my own since age 18 and had wandered the eastern half of America by motorcycle from Maine to Florida.  Eddie got to where he could tell my stories better than I could and when he did, I could tell he had actually lived them in his imagination.

Eddie and I had another connection.  We were both poets and loved to write.  He understood at a quantum level that to be a great writer you have to experience the words.  He had the remarkably wonderful ability to be able to do that through the actions of others. He also recreated the great stories of the famous authors we read.
  
Two weeks after meeting him I stopped thinking about him as a *******. Many times, it seemed like he had advantages and strengths that those who knew him could only envy.  The longer I knew him, the more I felt that way.

Chapter Four: The Invite

We had just returned to classes after a long Thanksgiving weekend when Eddie said: “My dad wants to talk to you.” My mind immediately wondered:  What’s wrong, have I done something I shouldn’t have.

At 10:05 p.m., when our last class ended and I wheeled Eddie down two flights of stairs, (this building had no elevator), his father also named Ed was waiting at the bottom of the stairs.  He had that big smile on his face that he always greeted me with as I handed the wheelchair over to him …

“Kurt, my wife and I are having a little party at our house the night before Christmas Eve, and we’d like you to come. All of Eddies friends will be there and you should be there too.  Please think about it, it would mean so much to my wife Margaret.”

I thanked Eddie’s father and told him I’d have to check the holiday schedule with my parents and then get back to him.  Being the oldest of 21 grandchildren, who were brought up in an enclave or compound of five adjoining houses, the holidays were always jammed packed with activities the week before Christmas.  Those activities though were not my main concern. I had nothing decent to wear.

My wardrobe consisted of 2 pairs of jeans and 4 t-shirts plus one pair of quilted long johns that I wore on the motorcycle when the temperature dropped below 40 degrees.  Add my brown leather WW2 surplus bomber jacket to the ensemble and that constituted my wardrobe … not very impressive for a 25-year-old man. In fact, staring into my closet that night, it brought home to me in a way it hadn’t before that my life was about to change.

I had recently decided to take a sales job with a local company that specialized in selling home furnishings to local department stores and general merchandise retailers.  This would be a major departure for me, but the salary would be four times what I was making at the gas station.  I hadn’t told anyone about this because inside I felt like I was selling out.  The company had advanced me $250.00 — a large amount in 1973 —to buy suits before I showed up for my first day of work on January 3rd.

I still didn’t have a car but that was another perk of the new job. They would be leasing me one after my period of orientation was over in early February.  But now, back to my quandary about Eddie’s party.


Chapter 5: E.J. Korvettes

Brightly lit with fluorescent lighting, the store seemed enormous as I walked from aisle to aisle.  I wasn’t shopping for suits. I was trying to find something suitable to go to a holiday party and meet people I had never met before.  As I got to the end of the aisle, I looked into the mirror that marked the end of the men’s department and took stock at what I was seeing.

My hair was shoulder length, and my beard was at least 4 inches long.  I had told my new employer that I would cut my hair and trim my beard before starting in January but hadn’t done it yet. In all honesty, I was still having second thoughts about making such a drastic lifestyle change, and I would wait until the last minute to radically change my appearance.

I stared into the racks of men’s sportswear until I found what I thought might work for me.  It was a beige, fisherman’s knit sweater in size large.  The sweater looked great, but the price did not.  It was marked $10.00, and unlike many of the garments surrounding it — it was not on sale.

I had $24.00 to my name that night, and $10.00 would mean I would be eating oatmeal and peanut butter until my next pay at the gas station.  I walked around for at least a half-hour until someone came over the loudspeaker saying that in 15 minutes the store would be closing.  I started to walk out but something dragged me back.  I put the sweater under my arm and headed for the register. I had made up my mind not to use any of the advance money from the new company until any doubts I had about taking the job were dispelled.
The next night at class I told Eddie and his dad that I’d be happy to join them on December 23rd.


Chapter 6:  December, 23rd

It was 6:45 on Sunday, December 23rd, when I arrived in front of Eddie’s brick row house in what is known in Philadelphia as the Great Northeast.  Every house on the block looked alike but the front door to Eddie’s was open with just the glass storm door closed.  I could see the house looked packed from the outside.

I didn’t stop but decided to go around the block.  I had one more problem to solve — what do I do with the motorcycle?  I knew Eddie’s dad knew I had a motorcycle, but I wasn’t sure about his mother.  Some people had bad impressions of motorcycles — and their riders — in the 1970’s, and I terribly wanted to make a good impression.

As I circled the block, I found an empty spot on the street about 5 houses away from Eddie’s house.  I parked the bike and hid my helmet inside the hedge that was separating the street from the sidewalk. I tried to flatten my hair, took off my bomber jacket and walked to the front door.  I never made it …

Before I could even get to the front door, a petite, silver haired woman dressed in red and blue rushed out on her front walk, put both of her arms around my waist, squeezed tightly, and said … “Oh Kurt, we are so glad you’re here!”

I’ve been greeted and hugged many times in my life, but nothing has ever come close to the hug I got that night from a stranger.  By the time she walked me through the front door we were strangers no more.

Eddie’s immediate and extended family were as warm and inviting as both he and his father had been.  I felt immediately welcome, and the night passed quickly as I met one family member after the next.
At 10:30 Eddie said, “Let’s go downstairs and listen to some music and we can talk.” I picked Eddie up off the sofa he was laying on and carried him down the 13 stairs into a finished basement.  You knew right away this was Eddie’s domain.  His stereo was against the stairs and pictures of the local Philadelphia sports teams were up on the walls.  

It was good to see him at home in his own element. That night we talked about the, once again, lousy year the Eagles had had (going 2-11-1) and the state of the war in Vietnam.  This was standard stuff for young men in their twenties.

At 11:20 I heard the basement door open at the top of the stairs and saw a girl with two legs covered in white stockings come down only 5 steps, sit down, and look over at us. I could tell immediately from the look on her face — she was not impressed.  She then got back up, headed into the kitchen, and closed the basement door.

“Oh, don’t mind her.  That’s just my sister Kathryn. She works the 3-11 shift at Nazareth Hospital. She just wanted to see who this guy is that she’s heard so much about.”

“I don’t think she was very impressed by the look on her face,” I said back.  “Oh, don’t let that bother you, you know how girls are — she’s just my sister.”

She may have been just his sister, but she was now inside my head, and I couldn’t get her out.


Chapter 7: Force Majeure

“My God, what is all that racket upstairs?  It’s a woman’s voice, do you think she needs help?”

“No, that’s just Kathryn screaming at her boyfriend over the phone.  They haven’t been getting along lately, and this has become a regular occurrence.”

There are watershed moments in life, and I knew this was one of them.  “I better go check,” I said. “You’re out of coke anyway.”  Without waiting for an answer, or tacit permission, I grabbed his empty glass and headed up the stairs two at a time. I opened the basement door and stepped into the kitchen just in time to hear … “Ok then, we’re OFF for New Year’s Eve.”

Kathryn’s mother looked at me and with a twinkle in her eye gave me the ‘Irish Wink.’  Having an Irish grandmother, who had always been the love of my life, I knew what that wink meant, and a voice deep inside that I had no control over started to speak … “So, you don’t have a date for New Year’s Eve? What a shame!” She immediately glared back at me with venom in her eyes. “Well, as it happens, I don’t have one either. Why don’t you go out with me unless you’re afraid of a guy like me.”

I could see her mother standing behind her shaking her head up and down as if to say … “Ask her again.” “I’m not afraid of anything — especially a guy like you.”  “Good I said, then I’ll take that as a yes.”  Kathryn stood there by the phone with a look that was a combination of anger and intrigue.

“I don’t know. Where would we go, and I’m not going on the back of any motorcycle.”  “We can go wherever you like, and I promise it’ll be in a car.  I hear Zaberers in Atlantic City has a great New Year’s Eve party.” Kathryn was still silent as her mother Marge answered for her: “That sounds like fun, I know you’ll both have a great time."

At every point in my life when I needed saving, it was always a special woman who saved me — they didn’t come any more special than Marge Hudak.
As she walked me to the front door that night, she hugged me again as she said … “Next time, just park your motorcycle in front of the house and bring your helmet inside …

                                    How Did She Know


Chapter 8: The Aftermath

That New Year’s Eve would be the best night in my entire life.  We danced and talked, laughed and gazed, and I think in both of our hearts and minds — we knew.

I went on to take that new job because now I could see a clearer pathway to the future, and it included more than just me,
Sixty days later, on March 5th, I asked Kathryn to marry me, and she said, YES.  Six months after that we were married on September 22nd, and this year, 2024, we will celebrate 50 years together with our 2 children and 4 grandchildren.

We lost Eddie, and both of his parents, several years ago, but their memory lives on inside of us growing stronger with every passing day.

There’s no telling where my life would have gone had I ‘escaped’ out of that classroom that night and gotten away from the *******. Meeting Eddie confirmed what I think I already knew deep inside — that it is our own insecurities and fear that handicap us the most.
That night, Eddie offered to me more than just his friendship, his wit, his intellect, and his great strength of character. Meeting him turned into the greatest of all of life’s gifts …

                                        His Sister Kathryn
349 · Nov 2021
Blind Side
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2021
The last day of vacation,
you told me things had changed

The last day of vacation,
each word seducing pain

The last day of vacation,
a new look in your eyes

The last day of vacation,
unveiling your disguise

The last day of vacation,
your back to turn away

The last day of vacation,
our future gone astray

That last day of vacation,
the sun had left the sky

That last day of vacation
—hello became goodbye

(The New Room: November, 2021)
349 · Nov 2022
Virility's Throne
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2022
The bigger the battle
the greater the man
His future uncertain
his past to command

To struggle ennobled
beyond outcome or fate
Godlike in war
—divinity’s mate

(Dreamsleep: November, 2022)
349 · Aug 2019
Indifference
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2019
To inflict on tomorrow,
the empty promises of fate

The will to reign indifferent
—the devil’s cruelest form of hate

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2017)
348 · Mar 2021
The Beckoning Wind
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2021
The road is your only
companion
When the memories won’t **** you
—but the lingering will

(Highway 93 Lolo Montana: September, 1990)
348 · Jan 2024
Siddhartha
Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2024
Divinity’s candle
stays burning alive
not born or created
conceived or contrived

Its light from the center
forever shines through
the moment’s unveiling
delivering you

To places all knowing
through spaces unknown
the mix in the crucible
its myth to atone

The vision self-granted
when time is deposed
confirmed refutation
— with nothing to know

(Villanova University: January, 2024)
347 · Jun 2022
Saving Grace
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2022
Silence is charmed
disaster avoided
New breath to infuse
fresh words on the run

Tomorrow disarmed
the instant unleashing
Each moment a present
—time gifted becomes

(Dreamsleep: June, 2022)
347 · Aug 2022
Left To Right
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2022
Preying on the truth
politics sets the trap
Isolating fact from fiction
always on attack

Their circles non-concentric
each area zero-sum
To tempt your fate with poison bait
—never to become

(The New Room: July, 2022)
347 · Jul 2022
Smoke & Mirrors
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2022
I sold my memory
for a present reframed
The past in revision
—the future in shame

(Dreamsleep: July, 2022)
346 · Apr 2017
Damnation Refound
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2017
A Mississippi back road
  burns in my mind

Its memory twice buried,
  resurfaces, reminds

That Mississippi back road,
  you once led me down

Perdition, destruction,
—damnation refound

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2017)
346 · Mar 2021
Heaven's Tread
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2021
The last step to forgiveness
—love

(Dreamsleep: March, 2021)
‘From the 1st Book of Prayers’
345 · Aug 2018
Love Our Fate
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2018
If the world would only stop on cue
  all promises made would return anew

The seasons would rearrange their order
  and lines we’ve drawn—no longer borders

If the world would only dance on cue
  and kick up its heels for me and you

Then what a show we all could make
  to merengue together—with love our fate

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
345 · Apr 2019
Godel Was Right
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2019
Scientific Discovery…
but one grand paradox

The Spacetime Continuum
  —contradiction defined

(Greensboro North Carolina: April, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2017
Forty years,
  my will unbowed,
  —my loyalty untamed

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2017)
344 · Nov 2018
My Gatekeeper
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2018
Every voice needs an ear
  for it to be free

Every writer, a reader,
  or the words cease to be

In my case I’ve been lucky
  though she came to me late

For my dearest sweet Laura
  —the key to my gate

(Villanova Pennsylvania: November, 2018)
        ‘To My Dear Friend Laura’
344 · Aug 2022
Scarlet Letters
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2022
Good girls ask permission
bad girls seek forgiveness
Sins two faced till time erased
—sisters of injustice

(Dreamsleep: August, 2022)
343 · Jun 2019
Fire Still Burns
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2019
With age in my body,
but youth on the page

A sword old and rusted,
now tempers with rage

These bones may be brittle,
with feet slow to drill

But fire still burns
—in my memory and will

(Villanova Pennsylvania: December, 2016)
343 · Feb 2022
Set In Stone
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2022
Change what you did,
and I’ll change how I feel
You can’t change forever
denying what’s real
The fly’s in the ointment,
the die has been cast
This moment endemic
—predestined to last

(Dreamsleep: February, 2022)
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