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I hate how I love you
I hate how I have no choice in the matter
I hate how you still hold a special place in my heart

I hate how I felt depression for the first time in my life after losing you
I hate how I could let you affect me so profoundly

I hate how not a day has passed since you left that I haven’t thought about you at least a little
I hate how I have to live with you occupying this space in my head

I hate that you’ll always be in someone else’s arms
I hate that I don’t want you in mine

I hate that I can’t just turn off the memories
I hate that I can’t turn off you
The Secret To Being Single:
Be A Broken Person.
Merry Christmas babe.
Seriously though, how's Your Fencer doing, Two A.M.?
Goodbye.

With a period.

No: Ps

None of that: by the way I will always miss you

Zero: but ifs

I won't add an: unless...

To the end of this goodbye.

This one is forever

So when I see you again one day

Don't try to speak to me

Because you are not the you I used to know anymore

You have changed

I have said goodbye to you

You can't harm me or those I love anymore

You can't ***** up my whole life anymore

You are a stranger to me

...and I was always told not to talk to strangers.


Repost if you need to say goodbye to someone eternally.
Repost if you need to say goodbye to someone eternally.
Some fears are paralyzing




1. We need to talk


2. A random text message from him


3. Passcode incorrect
The password being wrong is usually the result of caplocks but it is a moment of panic
I'm okay right now
Which is a big deal for me
I have fake candles in my bed
And even though it's just a flickering light bulb
Not a real flame
I have the candles balanced on my pillow
A few inches from my face
And that wavering golden glow
Is somehow comforting
Because as I watched the candles
I realized
No matter how dimly they flicker
They always flicker back to shining
So I know
No matter how bad I get
Even when my "shattered moments" kick in
I will be okay
I just need to wait
While the cold and icy hands of depression and numbness grip me
Because they WILL let go
I will be okay
These candles really comfort me. Even though it isn't a real flame. Plus if my mother walks into my room now she will have a heart attack because it looks like I have open fire in my bed on an unbalanced surface... which is a little funny to imagine.
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