Where were you when I started crying every day at 2?

Where were you when life contemplating was the only thing I could do?

Where were you when the pain of every thing that has ever hurt me hit me all at once?

Where were you when I found the razor blade and started cutting again for fun?

Where were you when I cut too deep and the world slowly faded to black?

You aren't here, you never are, so who knows whose fate is that.

I've probably taken 30 showers
But your scent won't wash away
And the mistakes I've made
Still rest on my shoulders
Pulling my head
Under the water

she chewed through my ribs
& attached me to wings

subsistent, pretending
I don't need a thing

she pushed through my body
propelling a shriek

her hand fits me close
& her sleep fit my sheets

but I'm done with she's perfect
I'm shrinking in blinks
& I'm sick of this
balancing stilts built on dreams

& I've stopped all this tripping
my shoes are on tight
but I'll  
fall asleep
hoping
you slept good tonight