There is a deep sadness building
up inside this chest.

The cavity protecting this weak
heart is caving in.

This skull is cracking from the
bitter thoughts that run endlessly
through this brain.

These fingers are growing cold
from the lack of warmth they
find when they reach out to
find nothing waiting.

This stomach churns at the
thought of you never being
here.

These legs grow restless when
they only long to run to you.

These lips quiver when they
have no chance of speaking
with you.

These lungs can't breathe
without your breath
entering my mouth.

How will this body survive,
if it does not have you near?

I stare blankly at the open door.
Music drifts from my headphones
and through my mind.
But I pay no attention.
My mind is like a lake before a storm.
Absolutely still and gray.
I don't feel anything.
I keep walking through my life,
waiting for something to happen.
I'm in love and loved
but my mind is ignoring her.
In the recesses of my mind.
There is only pain and a midnight sky
without its stars.
I want to step outside and smile.
But that seems impossible when
there is nothing inside of me that wants to move
from my position on the floor.
I wish I could lay here forever but
there are people who say they need me.
If they need me so much, why does everything
I do for them seem so wrong?
They're always dissatisfied with me.
I don't understand it.
Just let me go if I'm so bad.
So weak. So lame and lazy and stupid.
But you won't,
and instead you keep a puppet,
whose empty shell guards the girl from the outside.
I don't want to be here,
especially here with you.

If I like you, you'll know it.
If I love you, I'll show it.
If we decide to plant that seed,
then we'll most definitely grow it.

If I'm offering my time & my mind & my thoughts,
Then like a firefly, I'm just waiting to be caught.

If I'm putting in the effort and I'm willing to commit,
I'll expect the same from you, through the thin & through the thick.

If you invest yourself in us and simply give me all you got,
I'll let down my walls and love again, and never ever stop.

If you catch me as I'm falling, and won't let me hit the ground,
I'll show you where chivalry's been hiding; I'll let you hear love's beautiful sound..

I see the brightness of your smile on my darkest day.
I smell the sweet scent of your memories from miles away.
And on my luckiest days, I can taste the air you breathe.
Not a day goes by where you fail to dominate my thoughts..

I rub your smooth skin in my sleep.
I kiss your soft lips in my dreams.
I indulge myself in you...all of you, in what seems to be my happy ending.
Not a night goes by where you fail to command my mind...

Every step I take and every move I make revolves around you.
Every moment that goes by, I'm reminded of your warm embrace.

Your delicate touch and your gentle kisses are missed more and more each day,
And with each sunrise and sunset, they become that much harder to wash away...

To you what we had seems to be faded, meaningless and rotten.
But the imprint you've left on my soul will never be forgotten..

pick me up
play with me
accidentally
drop me
mommy
throws me
away.
i lie in a plastic can for
two days
get wrapped up
put outside
in the fresh morning air
for
two hours
picked up
dumped
into a big truck
with other people
just
like
me
we take a roadtrip
try to see
what there is
to see
but the view
is pretty ******
we all have a convention
in a big, loud building
we talk about
what we did wrong
and what really wasn't
our fault
some don't even
talk
because they are
too broken...
...we are suddenly
put back together
(in a sense)
back into
working order
crushed into
orderly cubes
so not one of us
hangs loose
they
file us away
where we stay
and stay
and
stay
rejects
of a society
that broke us