I carved our names in the tree
Forever imprinted there
It seems to ignites the trees growth
Leafs flourish bright green full of life
Sweet plums sprout out
Filling the branches
They're sweet like our new love
Roots nurtured by our overflowing passion
But even the sun that provides life can **** it with its sun rays
This is either going to last forever
Be more beautiful then when the sun peeks from behind the horizon
Painting the sky with reds and oranges
Heaven seems to flaunt it's light upon us
Birds dance in the Rays
This seems to be some fairytale movie scene
Or come crashing down harder then a 9/11 plane
Ruining the foundations we built this on
Fires melting away the frame we tried so hard to sustain
Molten metal wears and tears at our skin
Only a person in the inside could cause such damage
Or was it the influences from the outside
Either way it's a day unexpected like D DAY
What can I say
I tried to show you beautiful things
But it ended bad like a lost wedding ring
And you can tell me if this ever ends
Was the love we felt
Worth the everlasting pain
Even the tree feels the effects
Leafs no longer green
Branches splintered
Fruits withered
Uprooted roots
And the bark cracked
Splitting our names apart

Sometimes,
I feel like tearing these boundaries
Between love, hope and unity,
Hindering every existence
From meeting my eye
Making my eyes crave
To see a peaceful life.

I sit in the shade
On summer days
And wish I could reach the sunlight.

My days are grey,
And I dream of days
Where I wake up in that same light.

On those days,
I will jump out of bed
And be happy to look in the mirror.

I cannot lie,
I am looking forward
To those days where I will feel better.

The girl I love
has demons inside her head
and beneath her demure facade
is a turbulence
no one should ever know.
the same eyes that light up
when she talks about her
photo shoots
or coffee
or me
can darken in an instant
and I can't do anything
but hold her as she cries.
the taste of tear drops
on her lips
is bittersweet
and the salty tang
reminds me
that this is my battle
too.
sometimes she'll call me
in the middle of the night
and I know that something's wrong
as soon as I hear her ringtone
(our song)
because even though
her voice is the most gorgeous sound
I've ever heard,
she would rather carefully craft her thoughts
with texts
than open her heart
candidly.
I answer the phone
with shaking fingers
and ask, "Are you okay?"
there is a pause
and I swear to god
there are a million deaths
and a million births
in that space of silence.
"Baby,
the demons are talking
and I don't think
I can take it."
her voice is a hoarse shadow
of its usual smooth sweetness
wounded by chokes and sobs.
"Everything will be okay."
my words are as much reassurance
to myself
as they are to her.
"I'm on my way."
and when I find her
I hold her tight
and I'm relieved she's still breathing.
but the familiar glint
of a razor blade
stained with red
catches my eye
and I start to cry
too.
I pull her beneath the safety of the blankets
and kiss her forehead
as our fingers entwine
and I start to sing her favorite songs
as a mantra to ward off the demons.
she's soon asleep
and I untangle our limbs
and give her one last kiss
before standing unsteadily.
without hesitation
I grab the demon's weapon
from her nightstand
and shove it in my pocket
because I know the trash cans aren't safe.
something snaps inside me
and I throw open her drawer
to reveal dozens more.
I take those, too,
and I search the rest of her room
tearing through her photographs
and vinyl records
and the finger paintings we made together
to collect every blade I could find.
I soon find myself in her bathroom
ripping open her medicine cabinent
grimacing at the bottle emblazoned with her name
full of the pills she never takes.
I collapse onto the cold tile of the ground
knees drawn to my chest
eyes stained with tears
pockets full of razor blades
heart devoid of hope.
The girl I love
has demons inside her head
and they talk to me
too.

~

Draped in dreams of liquid tides
Shallow waters cool the breeze
Toes drenched of vast believing
From grassy banks, soft and pure
Ripples of time pass slowly
Blue sky desires paint our thoughts
Soothing sunlight sparkles
Glistening on the surface
A butterfly lands on your shoulder
Attracted by the rose bud in your hair
Happiness touches softly
As you brush its tiny wings
It flutters…as does your beauty

“And you are happy”
  
Your smile enchants me
Indigo reflects in your eyes
Skin glowing iridescent
In warmth felt deeply
Beneath this shade tree
I imagine us…always
Sweet lips beckon
Aromatic Jasmine scent
Tingles my senses
Euphoria in this wildflower meadow
Harmonic blooms sway melodically
Nature’s symphonic movements
And as we kiss…my heart sings

“And I am happy”

Do you see how you have helped me,
Once before I can remember running home after school,
Just to see my Blade,
And to see the fresh wounds,
And Red trails everywhere,
Yet today I'm clean,
And I smile,
For you,
I'm going through hell,
Yet I'm here because I can't see myself without you my dear.

I didn't know that I could feel this strongly about every breath another human being takes, or for that matter, who's lucky enough to breathe that same air.