I feel bright,
I see light,
Lifted burden,
Self inflicted to uplifted,
One simple move gave me a whole new
Energy,
A focus on the here and now,
The sky, the ground!
I feel free, unshackled and me!
What a relief!
I’ve been so blind not to see,
I put myself inside a prisoned mind,
I’m looking at the sky,
The sun the clouds,
I laugh out loud,
As I finally see,
The strength in me

Your smile is more
Than a craving
Of a sugary quick fix
It’s as essential
To my survival
As water
And food

I could make excuses
Defend my ways
But
I enjoyed the virtual embrace
Your voice
Your face
I was feeling displaced
In a state of haste
I won't deflect the pace

I pictured your hands on my body
And my body in your hands
I longed for foreign lands
Where the seashore lapped the sands
Entwined like our hands
Sea and setting sun become one
Without dusk, dawn would never come
And the song birds wouldn’t have sung

Since Tuesday night I've felt a bit *******.
A negative energy feeling about the situation.
You no doubt think badly of me and I totally get that.
I didn't intend to be dishonest or morally ambiguous.
I wasn't even initially attracted to you.
But then you evoked an interest.
I liked your humour, your bluntness, confidence and when you told me little details about you.
You turned me on. You turn me on.
I wanted to know more.
You excited me and I enjoyed it. I became attracted to you.
I admit, I never discouraged you.
You never asked me personal details and didn't divulge your own.
I assumed that was because you were just having fun, which was fine.
So was I.
I'd never done this before.
Online with someone I've never met, it's all new to me.
Attraction is a strange thing.
Maybe I'm unsatisfied, fed up or stagnant with where I'm at.
Maybe things happen for a reason.
I don't know.
Who says what socially acceptable limitations are.
I want you to know though, I didn't mean to deceive you.
I actually wanted you to know but I wasn't sure you were interested in knowing.
I don't want to be a freak and make a dramatic deal over it when you probably couldn't care less.
I don't like the thought of making you feel crap about it though.


So I wrote something down. I guess trying to explain. Didn't want to fire it off at an inappropriate moment or you may not want to hear it at all.
Which is fine.