It's a shame I remember those days we lived..
the days we couldn't help but look into each others eyes..
the days when silence meant love..
when one look said it all..
when talking was fun and not a favor..
It's a shame I remember what you have already forgotten.

You are the best thing
That's still happening to me.
(:

Today, like so many other days
my ipod shuffles (luna)
and lands on
a picture of you and me
your hand alongside my face
your eyes holding a depth
indescribable
having the kind of love
even tears cannot show.
And later, dashing about
my computer you are
there
like a surprise visitor who
suddenly entered the room
part angel, part ghost
and I catch my breath
my stomach and heart fight
for my throat.
Love so broken and neither
of us know how to fix it.
Both of us still  
feel our Pisces
tails tied together
still dream of how it
should
have been.
(3-7, 7lbs, 14 oz, blue eyed me,
brown eyed you)
Your beauty paralyzes me.
I think I will cry over you for
the rest of my life.

I hate you and all that you're about
I hate that because of you I'm filled with doubt
Because of you I now sit in Hell
I believed all of those lies you use to tell
You said you were all I would ever need
I was naive and I followed your lead
You treated me good and took away all my pain
I had no idea on my soul you would leave this stain
When I was all alone you were there for me
Before long you were all that I could see
But when I was ready to leave you wouldn't let me go
Suddenly I found it impossible to tell you no
Try as I did I just couldn't get away
You made it clear you were here to stay
You laughed in my face and called me a fool
I had no choice but to follow your rules
No more family, laughter,and loving hugs
Thats the price I paid when I turned to drugs

I'm sorry
If it seems like I don't care anymore.
I've stopped asking,
"How do you do?"
I've stopped telling you,
"You can be happy, why feel blue?"
Because I've learnt my lesson
It's best to be silenced.

I'll just stay here
Silently
Reading books
About the mind and the soul.

Though I've stopped
I want you to know
Deep
In there
I care a lot
I still do.
So much about
You
And you
And all of you.

The sun is soft this year.

It sits so still above the carpet of the clouds,
Bashful and modest
For its own resplendence.

How I understand Icarus,
And his moth-like lust for
Its motherly warmth.

How I wish to slip beneath its surface
And to find myself bathed in
Life and light.

How I would forgo the steel of the sea
And the cold blue of the sky
To return to the star that birthed me

And all of my love for words.

The last time I saw you, you were standing there at the gate, watching me walk away  
I was trying to look cool, like nostalgia in motion
That’s a difficult thing to pull off when you’re constantly looking back 
You were smiling and waving, like it was all gonna be alright
I secretly hated you for that  
Everything in my being screamed at me to turn around, to run back to you
I wanted to take your hand in mine and pull you out of there like Wayne did to Cassandra…
Only I didn’t

I did my duty
I turned around one last time at the end of the longest hallway in the world and stole one last look
Blinking back the burning sensation in my eyeballs and the tightness in my throat
And then I plodded on
Just like I was supposed to
I had a stabbing pain in my gut like things would never be the same again
Like the WE we were was dying and going away forever  
At the time I dismissed that sharp unbearable thought as sentimental weakness
The sloshy musings of an admittedly overdramatic youth  
Never would’ve guessed my gut knew so much more than my thirsty brain
With its linear logic and high powered deductive reasoning
I told myself we’d be together again soon
I told myself to focus on the task at hand, and you’d be the reward waiting for me at the end of it all
The bright white light at the end of my long dark tunnel  
I told myself you’d be the sunshine on the other side of the mountain
Knowing somewhere deep down it wasn’t true  
Knowing somewhere deep down, that the WE we were
Now existed only in my fondest memories
Only in the dark moments I would occasionally indulge on the cool side of my pillow
I turned around
And walked out of your life