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Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
Silently she hung her head
And drifted loaftly off to bed
Sadly she laid her head down
Her face was frozen masked by a frown
Her heart had grown dreary from the cold days
And her love kicked out there was no room to stay
She often stood about a cliff
As she listened to the ocean drift
She heard if happiness lying there
As she stared into the waters glare
Not every story ends with love
Not ever story releases doves
Her story was met with an ending of life
Consumed by pain and swallowed by strife
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
I've been waiting for you
You were halfway in my hand
Until she wanted you too
And you ventured to her land

And you thought you fell in love
And left me wasted at the end
And you that she was your love
Until you found it was pretend

Then you called me up with fake apologies
And you thought I'd take you back
I thought your were a disease
And I know this for a fact

I was through even though my heart broke
I was done though I wanted to cry
And when I turned around I chocked
And I thought I wanted to die

But your memories are gone
In the box in my head
When I said so long
And my love was truly dead
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
This house was built of love
Every brick every stone
The top could touch the skies above
And there I wasn't alone

Until your hate broke it down
I thought we had it all
Until the bricks lie on the ground
And I watched the house fall

I just sat with our loves remains
Laying in my arms
The hurt and pain that left a stain
Left scars of harm

Perhaps I fooled myself with this
It was to much to believe
That thoughtful night, that one last kiss
It was easy to deceive

So now I'm homeless I walk alone
The shadows take me in
I wait for life on my own
Mournfully to begin
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
Sleep is growing harder
Always the forest
Spirt tell me what you need to
I want to sleep again
It's been years since it happened for the first time
The dream had replayed ever night
The stables were on fire
They pounded after me
I was scared
Running from the snarls
And snapping of teeth
I ran into the flame swallowed stall
But I wasn't afraid
They engulfed me
And the sad eyes of a wolf
Looked at me from the other side of
The stable
Why child? Do you **** yourself?
It always
Ended in those words
I was scared to understand those words
But now years later
I run the forest through
Searching
Always searching
Until I can find them
The trees all bow to the ground
I was home
I could run freely with them
Why child? Do you **** yourself?
These words haunt me
As the wolves eyes burn me
I decide I will name the him spirt wolf
Sprit wolf take me home
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
There are strange things done in the midnight sun
      By the men who moil for gold;
The Arctic trails have their secret tales
      That would make your blood run cold;
The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,
      But the queerest they ever did see
Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge
      I cremated Sam McGee.

Now Sam McGee was from Tennessee, where the cotton blooms and blows.
Why he left his home in the South to roam 'round the Pole, God only knows.
He was always cold, but the land of gold seemed to hold him like a spell;
Though he'd often say in his homely way that "he'd sooner live in hell."

On a Christmas Day we were mushing our way over the Dawson trail.
Talk of your cold! through the parka's fold it stabbed like a driven nail.
If our eyes we'd close, then the lashes froze till sometimes we couldn't see;
It wasn't much fun, but the only one to whimper was Sam McGee.

And that very night, as we lay packed tight in our robes beneath the snow,
And the dogs were fed, and the stars o'erhead were dancing heel and toe,
He turned to me, and "Cap," says he, "I'll cash in this trip, I guess;
And if I do, I'm asking that you won't refuse my last request."

Well, he seemed so low that I couldn't say no; then he says with a sort of moan:
"It's the cursèd cold, and it's got right hold till I'm chilled clean through to the bone.
Yet 'tain't being dead—it's my awful dread of the icy grave that pains;
So I want you to swear that, foul or fair, you'll cremate my last remains."

A pal's last need is a thing to heed, so I swore I would not fail;
And we started on at the streak of dawn; but God! he looked ghastly pale.
He crouched on the sleigh, and he raved all day of his home in Tennessee;
And before nightfall a corpse was all that was left of Sam McGee.

There wasn't a breath in that land of death, and I hurried, horror-driven,
With a corpse half hid that I couldn't get rid, because of a promise given;
It was lashed to the sleigh, and it seemed to say: "You may tax your brawn and brains,
But you promised true, and it's up to you to cremate those last remains."

Now a promise made is a debt unpaid, and the trail has its own stern code.
In the days to come, though my lips were dumb, in my heart how I cursed that load.
In the long, long night, by the lone firelight, while the huskies, round in a ring,
Howled out their woes to the homeless snows— O God! how I loathed the thing.

And every day that quiet clay seemed to heavy and heavier grow;
And on I went, though the dogs were spent and the grub was getting low;
The trail was bad, and I felt half mad, but I swore I would not give in;
And I'd often sing to the hateful thing, and it hearkened with a grin.

Till I came to the marge of Lake Lebarge, and a derelict there lay;
It was jammed in the ice, but I saw in a trice it was called the "Alice May."
And I looked at it, and I thought a bit, and I looked at my frozen chum;
Then "Here," said I, with a sudden cry, "is my cre-ma-tor-eum."

Some planks I tore from the cabin floor, and I lit the boiler fire;
Some coal I found that was lying around, and I heaped the fuel higher;
The flames just soared, and the furnace roared—such a blaze you seldom see;
And I burrowed a hole in the glowing coal, and I stuffed in Sam McGee.

Then I made a hike, for I didn't like to hear him sizzle so;
And the heavens scowled, and the huskies howled, and the wind began to blow.
It was icy cold, but the hot sweat rolled down my cheeks, and I don't know why;
And the greasy smoke in an inky cloak went streaking down the sky.

I do not know how long in the snow I wrestled with grisly fear;
But the stars came out and they danced about ere again I ventured near;
I was sick with dread, but I bravely said: "I'll just take a peep inside.
I guess he's cooked, and it's time I looked"; ... then the door I opened wide.

And there sat Sam, looking cool and calm, in the heart of the furnace roar;
And he wore a smile you could see a mile, and he said: "Please close that door.
It's fine in here, but I greatly fear you'll let in the cold and storm—
Since I left Plumtree, down in Tennessee, it's the first time I've been warm."

There are strange things done in the midnight sun
      By the men who moil for gold;
The Arctic trails have their secret tales
      That would make your blood run cold;
The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,
      But the queerest they ever did see
Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge
      I cremated Sam McGee.
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
My bones are bones
My flesh will rot
My soul will fly
But I will not
My heart will beat
Beneath the earth
When time defeats
And the universe begins rebirth
I will lay
Eyes rested
Doomsday
Moon crested
Cremate my heart
I rather not be cold
I've broken many apart
Being cold
Many nights of sin
Empty bottles of gin
Broken chairs
And glass
Litter the floor
But sealed shut is my door
I'm so...
Dead
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
The school halls where plagued
I could feel there eyes
Pointed stares
I could feel it all before it happened
Pushed to the ground
Beaten to blood
Threatened
Cut down to size
Under attack
Try to shield my face
But I'm to weak
I must deserve this
I must have done something wrong
A busted lip
But no one asks
No one helps
Class is done
School bell rung
Now the bus ride home
Dreaded because I know they'll be there
I get on early
To sit in the front
Maybe then they won't get me
But there words hit me
Just as hard
Ugly
Fat
****
Dumb
*****
I break and I break
But today I reached the last shard
Home alone I cry
Sobbing
I was dead before I did it
I was already gone
I had been for months
I just hadn't left yet
I wrote the note my mom
To my brother
To my friends
It wasn't there fault
I wrote one to the bullies
I apologized for whatever I did
To make them hate me
I apologized and told them that I would just
Make their life better
Once I finished I went to the bathroom
Looked in the mirror
My eyes were sad
I pushed up my sleeves and revealed the scars
They were there like a tattoo to remind me
That I'm nothing
That I'm better off gone
I open the cabinet
I select the pills randomly
God won't have room in heaven for me
Not if they didn't have room for me here
I take them all
I cry
I swallow them
With a thick throat
I'm scared but I don't stop
I can't remember who I used to be
Who my friends used to be
They wanted me dead
They needed me gone to
They just couldn't say it
I felt the numbness sweep over me
And slowly I'm dust in the wind
Leaves falling from a deciduous tree
I'm dying
No more crying
Maybe peace
I see a lot of people being bullied, and I try to help them all because no one should have to feel put down, I do not support bullying
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