I remembered every movie I've ever seen with you
I remembered every date I used to go on with you
Every restaurant
Every park
Every time we shared I remembered

Sometimes I wished I could have an eternal sunshine
But sometimes I wanted to hold on to the memories we made
Even though they tortured me daily
And I was left mostly of the memory of the day you left me

I was scared
Terrified
Every second of that day felt like a repeated stab to the stomach
And with each moment before it would fade I just wanted to keep it there
Then you told me and gutted me

My insides laid out before you
What I am truly laid out before you
And you turned around
And you left me

I told you that it was alright
That I can put myself back together
It wasn't the first time I've been cut open
It'd be easy to seal up the wound this time

But I can't
The wound is too deep
Parts of it my fault and part of it yours
It won't go back in

Now my insides are nothing
First they rotted
Then they disintegrated
Now all I am left with is nothing but hollow emptiness

There are many ways that you can define me:
Womanizer
Selfish
Crazy
Distasteful
Despicable
I will tell you this that how you define me is not me

I am privileged to say
That I can define myself
That everybody has the right to define themselves
But the problem is
We are blinded by our own definitions of self

We parish by our own definitions
We stare at ourselves and our pasts only make us see
Disappointment
Ugliness
Self-loathing
Sadness
Pain

Pain is the one we've grown so accustomed to
An old phrase says it is best to feel pain
Instead of nothing
But I would rather keep feeling joy forever
Rather than feel a needle of pain again

I feel hollowness
I feel the pain of my past
The darkness of my past
Reach up and consume me
Drag me in and tear me apart
Piece by piece
Until I think I know my definition of self
And I feel numb

I ponder my thoughts
Try to see beyond
I feel sad and alone
But then...

I see a bunch of figures
Bright
Peaceful
Joyous
Without the pain
Though they were once like me

I asked them what they did
How they saved themselves
From this pain
They lead me to the Truth
And left it wide open for me

I feel calm
At peace
At rest with myself

I remember how I once defined myself
My past
My failures
My sins
I now know that it doesn't define me

I am a child
I am a follower
I am a disciple
I am beautiful
I am perfected
I am an image
I am the definition of me that I have always wanted

I think as humans
That we were meant for more
Than we had bargained for
That we are worth more
Than we could ever see ourselves be worth
I think that we are simply meant to be
More than human

Think of being just a human
What are you when you are human?
Maybe you are a slave to the idea of money
A slave to the idea of the approval of others
A slave to the weakness of your own flesh
Or maybe you are just a slave to emptiness

As a human you are
weak
pathetic
a nerd
a dumb ****
a fat girl
a queer
a problem
a flaw that spreads from a speck to a blemish on what was once pure

We were meant for more than this
We are here to love and to be loved
We are here to be slaves to joy and love
No one can ever escape from slavery
So one should be a slave to something more powerful than oneself

We are more than human
We are purpose
We are children
We are the brothers and sisters put here on this Earth
To love God and through Him love one another

We were meant to be better than what we are
And many of us have lost the way
Maybe one day they will be found
And maybe then they can become more than human

Within the fire
There is destruction
Burning the homes
Of the destitute souls
Crawling and begging for death

"Answer me!" they say, "Come down and cool our tongues."
Though no one comes
They stay alone in there sadness
Empty in the dark
Gritting their teeth as they try to crawl their way out
But they cannot reach nor feel relief
They never will again

Within the fire
There is light
Guiding the way home
To those who search for it
Returning back to open arms

"Never will I fear again!" they say, "I will never thirst again."
They take feast
At a seat amongst the highest table
Their images clear and bright
Taking the food in which they enjoy but no longer need
Feeling no pain and suffering
They never will again

The world is on fire
Fire leads the way
The way to destruction or the way home
The way home is wide open
Open to those that use the fire to find it

Why must all of my
outstanding inspirations
come at 2AM?

-kk

It’s funny because
I’m as patient as they come
But can’t wait for you

No matter what it is I tell you, you just reply okay
I'm not trying to get angry, but that's all you ever say
I start each conversation, and it's like you try to end it
I waste every moment, 'cause it's time you won't commit

If you've found some one else, I hope he brings out your smile
Because I promise you won't see mine, at least not for while
You mean more to me, than even my own life
So many times you were the reason, I put down the knife

You are my perfect little angel, the best thing I've known
I guess this is my all fault, for all the love I've never shown