Dance with me in the darkness until it fades

Spent so much of life
dying inside
Maybe it's time to spend
remaining time
living

Floating in the tank got me thirsty for more
Sinking to the bottom felt heaven was right next door
Taken by your rough hands and smacked around the head got me scratching below the surface to wear the blood as coat of dead
Chains to all my limbs found contorted charms
Twisted and amused finding mercy praying palms
So pain me by all means but I've already been torn apart
I can be your sweetest nightmare or wickedest dreams
Don't take it all to heart

Feeling sick in bed
So afternoon of rest
Tea and cake in bed
Guided meditations for the head
Sleep to loosen bodies tight tread
I look rough and face has zits
No makeup face today
Sent out love and receive my own internally
I wasn't perfect anyway and that's ok
Each unique in their own blessed way
Cake was nice
Tea was sweeet :-D
Waheyyy!!!

The words you say are just right
Guided by the light
To live
A new day

Tonight to cosy up
Comfy sofa, toasty wear
A movie perhaps
A comedy to cheer, laughter to lift the air
A spot of the warm whiskey nectar
Honey on the spot
Ice, just one single drop
I guess I'm in for a good night to self
Well my company is hard to top :-D

Deep down I feel really alone
But I have to remember
I'm
not

They say it's not good to live in the past
But sometimes the past wants to come up to talk
We will work things out

The truth may lie in the last place you look
And once you find that
You may need to look again

He lays on top of me
Such sweet kisses
Making me giggle
Licking my face
The dog

Balance strong and firm
The waves toss and turn
Flowing with the movement
The ocean and it's tide
Knowing peace and harmony is resting on the sand

The pain cuts me deep
I can't feel it's sharp metal scraping and slicing at my insides
I feel the stomach writhe and tremble
The throat and teeth tighten and clench
Head pressure
Eyes colourless and hollow
Intense energy swirling
Sadness Anger Fear Hurt Shame become my friends
I sit with my guests
Every pain that visits I can learn to entertain
With time I feel the pains will grow but maybe I will see them coming
The pain grows as I do
So for that I should say Thankyou!

Last holiday our break began
The words were in another state
Holding hands and kisses gone

Next holiday will be lived
with love and song

To come round to this world as a veil of bedding
rests upon thy face

Words echo back the messages we need to hear
Reflections on disturbed pools of water can become so clear

The things I've seen most wouldn't believe in
I wasn't sure I did at first til they appeared out of the blue
Expand the mind
Broaden the view
Hopefully this will also lead to allow most joyous and sacred dreams to come true

I don't know what I'm looking for
anymore
I feel like I've already watched it all
fade . .  .

It's funny how we can determine our worth through a job
I let mine go
My house has rarely been a home not healthy in its bones
All possessions are damaged goods
I need to let them go
Bit by bit
I throw them away
The letters
The pictures
The memories
Cannot be reframed
Soiled by a house in disrepair
Not sure where I'm going but it's not back there

As I sit and take in the moment

Observe the view over my tea cup

I wonder deeply thoughtfully and sincerely

How many....

dunks do I think this chocolate digestive can take?

The ignorant eat the worm gulping it down without knowing what it is
The ones who's look for truth to the worm
choke each time
they try
to
eat

Purity and grace
Sunflowers face
Growing in beauties place
Of innocence and charm
A field of natures calm
Harmony arm in arm
The love goes on and on
Pretty everlasting state
Daisy-chain

Take me on the winds journey
I flow through air and breeze
Over swaying tree tops and clearest deepest seas
High above worlds crust
land at feet
Fly to the skies
as earth and heaven horizon
shall run to meet

I'm too cold
Too old for this
Where's my love
My final kiss

I met him at a bar
An older man with old soul charm
Talking and he could see I liked to dance
He held out hand to palm
We whirled around as ballroom stars and time was all erased

What you do to another you do to yourself
Once you learn this you don't want to intentionally hurt anyone else
Though we also learn to forgive too
As we recognize our own
fallibility

Attachment
Non attach
Be yourself
Don't say that
Let your heart be pure
Let shadows dance
Love yourself
Be more than that
Appreciate what you have
Strive for more
Burn with desire
Desire is flawed
Know thyself
Change your ways
Sleep the night
Wake for days
Love all
Protect your boundaries
Pray to God
Surrender on your knees
Don't over think
Learn to please
Life is connected
Full of duality
Go within
Find you
There is no one here
Embrace the darkness
Fight the fear
I tell you what I'm exhausted
Here!
But I've done nothing
today

Dreams of embracing arms
Feeling like home

555 was the time on the clock
On this first day
The past will stop
Receive the present as a gift
Feel the heart as lighter lift
On towards the coming year
With angels and guardians to you are near

How can you expect to help others if you never know struggles
You wouldn't ask someone else to give up
So why should you give up on you

Dreams are active
Purging takes dominance
A theme centred to all else
Subconscious and conscious stirrings to where hurt is felt
Where insecurities stem and powers knelt
Wounds uncovered injury cries out
Direction to paths walked back and the steps trodden lightly this time
Attention to those muddied footprints and the remnants that stick and pull
Awareness to how the ship was bashed against heavy rocks and lessons in how to captain or how waves should course and sail the hull
Rest was busy and rather full but some sleep within this dream school

Let's light a candle
Talk
Set the world to rights
Speak of passions that burn through night
Joke and play as time slips away
Soft tender touches to begin
Eyes enticing most
Growing closer
Content by company and host
Sharing same desire
Kiss to kiss attentive
Knowing
Tasting
Savoring
Wetting appetite
Hunger so strong
You crave to go on
Firmly to each other's grips
Small bite between sips
Inside he slips
No other could feel like this
Bask in cups spill
Overflowing
Flame to wick intensifies
Liquid fuel action to lift up loves light

Those you love
Will always love
Despite what comes the way
You have to love them
Send them love
light
healing anyway

Even in the darkness
I sense the light
Even at my worst
I find love inside
Even without possessions
I find a gift in life
Even without you by my side
I find a reason

He touches me with passions raw
In his arms I really soar
Body to body deep connect
Mind to spirit heaven sent
Kisses melt heart to heart
Lips do feel of emotions not spoken
Sensing the love in each and every moment
Eyes sometimes bashful when looked into old worlds broken to new worlds of beauties splendor
Wonders from cosmic sender
Delving into oceans vast
Riding the waves of ****** euphoric blast
Waters edge to touch the land
Shore to shore
Hand to hand
Intimate islands to discover as we venture
more and more
into
one another

So often harsh on ourselves
Then take it out
on another

Everyone has a different perspective
They see what they want
Or how they choose to live their life and expect the same from their eyes
No one knows the true struggles you have faced
The changes in your life
The battles and scars
The ****** taste
They can judge
But they may be wrong
In the meantime I'll sing my own power song
If I am naked it must be for the acceptance of men it couldn't be for myself or for other women
If I show no shame Im shameless
I have opinions thrown left and right
But they weren't there to walk with me when I faced the darkest coldest longest nights
I crawled and I fought for my soul
My self
My
Life
So live and love your own life
As I will mine
I'm divine
I'm of the light

Giving myself more love each day
Because no one ever loved me in the deeply desired way
No other choice but to grow this state
I'm not giving up or giving in
Perhaps one day the love will stick
and stay

Energy

Energy transforms
Life on earth just a school
A teaching learning pool
The spirit lives on
In another form
In another
dimension

Twin flame don't you see what a mess you made of me

But we were in a mess to begin with



Let's burn it all away..

Healing begins inside
I see your pains and I want to help but I can't do the work for you
Until you do external triggers will have an emotional response perhaps not of benefit
The outer view will penetrate through hitting hard sending ripples to confuse and bruise the next person standing in front of faced queue
Peace of mind begins with you
Lighten the load
Accept own shadows too
Bit by bit
Drop by drop
World renew

Can
you imagine being God
&
carrying the weight of the world

on your  shoulders

Message in the numbers aligned to sight and sense
Reaching to the light after fear and darkness sent
Looking to the past
Growing in the present
Holding for the future
A candle in the hand
Wonders of the world
Instinct for vision and of sound
Peeking in the corners
-to feel what comes around
Stepping with the process
Spirit will know no bounds

Soft whispers in the morning
Soft tingles as I fall to sleep
Hands touch gently
Fingertips tickling the skin
Delicate feelin
From the outside
breathing in

It is in the
silence
most at peace
You don't
feel
any
thing

I wish I had found in self more support and thought less of me weak
Maybe then I wouldn't of run towards any I seek
So much time spending worth in someone that never saw the worth in me
Been made to sleep in floor as less than a dog should be treated
Kicked in legs and **** told so fat so should be beaten
Headbutted in face to hide their disgrace
Told pills weren't enough to end worldly phase
All turned around to make me look insane
The worst was being poked and pinned cause the ex from years ago thought I had bed another
Just had to make sure I was clean and safe
A bit much to tell
But if I can cleanse some of past hell
So what!
Farewell!..