Look at me:
I'm the captain
occupying borrowed space.
Thrown on fading campus,
grown through the cracks
of a forgotten place.

And I am tortured by regret,
things I've not done yet.
Thinking this defines me.

And I cannot deny
that I'm terrified
of fading to black.

I used to cherish every doubt--
now unsure in what I've found:
my instability was transparent
and now it's apparent...

And I now keep the lights on,
lay in a cold bath until warm.
My lips, so purple and svelte,
have sealed all I have felt.

And I stay a static transplant,
a homely nomadic infant,
stumbling towards the abyss,
thinking it's what I've missed.

I used to utilize the past,
stretching time, but at last,
the only fire I've consumed
will soon fade to black...

.

*In this dark, soft, silent sky
where starlight teardrops weep
in moon glow feathered sonnets,
my heart seeks. . .

clinging to every hope,
laced of tiny shimmered dreams
now filtered through weary eyes
and worried sighs

Collecting each moment shared
within my weathered hands, mixed
with the essence of maple
and snow flakes

woven together in northern patterns,
colorful arcs on distant horizons
bidding me a good evening while
riding in on a hovering mist

As another tear paints my cheek
in transparent worry
and desperate longing for that day
when happiness finds you,

for that is my endless wish,
behind tufted clouds of life,
touching me with poetic joy,
allowing me to breathe freely

For here I stand,
eternally gazing upward,
scanning the heavens
for that elusive glistening  

in this dark, soft, silent sky
where starlight teardrops weep
in moon glow feathered sonnets,
as my heart seeks . . . your smile

My hallowed eyes
Carved darkened shadows
In the floral skies;
And my endless wonder
Disheartens the sun
But it runs with the thunder
When all's said and done