Come September
A Dedication
For a dear friend
By
Jude Kyrie


September 11 2001

As a little girl in grade two
he sat next to me at school.
I always liked him.
no much more than that.
Later in high school
we walked home together.
He would carry my books.
At graduation he was my date.
We even went to college together.
That was when we broke the chains
of friendship and he became my lover.
My first and only love.

We married young
it was no surprise
to our parents
they were expecting it.
Before I knew it
we had three kids.
Two girls and a boy.
Our son looks just like him.

It was just like any other day
He came home from work
Cooked burgers on the barbeque.
We got the kids to bed
drank a glass of wine
went to bed at ten.

He wanted to make love
but I was exhausted
the kids had been terrors all day.
The next day he kissed me goodbye
With a see you later honey.

I got a call from my friend
She said put on the TV
I saw the towers fall
Turning to ashes
Like my life did that moment.
All I could think was
I wish I had made love
to him last night.

September 11 2015

The children are all grown up now
He would be so proud of them.
I look at my strong handsome son.
He looks like him exactly
We stand at ground zero
and say a prayer.

I whisper it was always you honey
Only you.
As if by magic he answered me
A giant beautiful rainbow
Circled over New York
And I know for sure
it was for me.

The big story everyone knows
it's the tiny dramas that stay
forever.
Jude

Fishing off Puffin Island as a boy
By Jude Kyrie

I remember back to my boyhood
it was a different place in time.
The little aluminum fishing boat.
Its ancient Johnson outboard motor.
leaving a wake splitting the calm Irish sea
off the coast of Anglesey in North Wales.
My grandfather lived his retirement
years out in the small fishing village.
We reach Puffin Island
a deserted rock of land full of nesting puffins
The anchor tossed over into the deep waters
of the Irish sea.
We dropped our lines in the water and waited.
The heavy lines tripple baited in anticipation
of a healthy dinner catch.
The schools of Mackerel
attacked  our bait
We were tired of pulling them into the boat.
My grandfather slitting the bellies
and cleaning them throwing the guts
back into the sea that bred them.
Hungry fish clamored for the feed.
nothing left for waste.
I held a spluttering Storm light
to pierce the blackness of the night.
My fear of a giant shark
attack filled my young heart.
we packed our catch and the propeller
creating a phosphorous wake behind us.
I marveled at the multitudes of species
below my feet.
And at the untamed violence and beauty of life
that we all shared on this wonderful planet.
And then back into darkness.
The total black darkness.

You are my sisters child not mine.
I think you were almost four back then.
it was so very long ago.
Your beauty astounded me.
You had me smitten then
and if truth be known
As you do now.

We were having a shore lunch by the lake.
The lake trout sizzled
in its butter on the barbeques.
When naked as a jaybird
You jumped from the dock.
Disappearing into the lakes deep waters
Into the world of minnows and trout

I jumped in to save you
but you were already at the surface
swimming in doggie paddle fashion.
Refusing my grip
in fierce independence.
A trait you still possess.
I saw the big sign
Danger No swimming
but I let you go staying close to you.
You were kept buoyant
by the fruits of the young
by life’s power that flowed from you

And for an hour
you stayed in that water.
You won’t remember I am sure
But I saw you forming
the great woman
that you became
As you scorned my help.
And swam to the dock
lifting yourself
onto its platform.
That’s the moment we clicked
Man and woman child
friends forever
an eternal unbreakable bond.

I met the poem again last night
the most beautiful poem.
His words silken and soft.
The tears of my need
fell down my face.
He spoke of family
belonging
even children
of love and respect.
they were untruths
but oh so sweet.
so much what I wanted.
He took me to his place
where he recited more poems
I fell naked into his verse.
He held me
in comforting words.
And in return
I became another of his poems.
All through the night
in his gentle arms
my verses rhymed.
I wept at his poems.
then in the morning light
he changed
no longer a beautiful poem
he drank coffee
and ate toast
and left me outside
as he went to his work.

I have left my journey too late.
The fall was too much like summer.
The food too plentiful
The wind too warm
as it whispered
sweet untruths to me.
The snows came
from a patient winter.
Covering the meadows
and trees.
Now the food was covered.
And the cold winds
cried a song of death.
The grey winter sky
contained no sweet thermals
to allow me to glide
in swooping graceful flight.
The southern climb
is too far for me travel alone.
The journey
over the sea too lonely.
The winter saw me
it wanted my tiny ilfe
it waited until I was fooled
and dreamt of endless summers.
and in my dream it brought
it's final justice

In the jungles
the lion roars his poems.
I am lost in the footpaths
that lead to his lair.
Primevil conflicts exist
in this dark place.
I know his poetry
contains my death.
Yet still I do not fear him
this is his domain.
Where the law is singular
and finite.
it is the keen edge
of the food chain.
we are not  different
the lion and I.
We are both
reciting our mantra
of **** or be killed.
of draw first blood
I see him in the shadows
huge his eyes red with menace.
He is snarling my poem
my death wish.
The poem he speaks
is beautiful.
It talks of time and history
of structure and balance.
I am transfixed
by his eloquence.
I raise my gun to place
the magnificent beast
within my sights.
Just one finger
I can remove this animal
from the world.
But he is more than I am
more worthy of survival
Purer of spirit and purpose.
The weapon points to ground
and instead I listen
to my final poem

how difficult the memory
of when you graced my eyes
the feeling of belonging
the promise of future sighs

the downy soft mantle
covered me with you
the rest of life was silent
as your eyes turned the sky
to blue.

The time ticked by so slowly
with children laughter and love
the nighttime filled with tenderness
the blessings from above

My heart has filled with poetry
the words are gossamer light
Sweeter than the songbird
that fills the air at night

my love she sleeps in tenderness
as soft as finest silk.
Poems fly like butterflies
as pure as ice cold milk

I will always bring my poems
for my blessed one to sleep
They cover her in eiderdown
all though the night
her soul to keep.

my poetry has become
a seagulls cry
my soul is adrift
on a becalmed sea.
This sailors wife
knitted his death
into his sweater.
the sea shall swallow me
with its infinite greed.
The cloudless sky
will take my poems
and recite them
from a place on high.
the verses melt
to a single sound.
my poetry has become
a seagulls cry.

Sitting alone

All I see are
reflections of you..
The wind blows
haunting memories
passing them
by my eyes
like dandelion seeds.
The rain taps
on the window pane
like your footsteps.
The clock on the mantle
ticks like your heartbeat.
Your framed picture
next to me calls
for my kisses.
But when I answer
with my lips
they touch
the ice cold glass.

You are

you are the fresh snowfall
that falls in gentle
mantle to protect the
living roots of all things
keeping them safe
from the harsh winter cold.
in the shadows of its
pristine surface
our reflections embrace.

you are the summer rain
cooling and refreshing
satisfying the thirst
of a parched earth.
bringing renewal to the
green valleys.
in its collected pools
our reflections
share a kiss.

you are the sun
the center of my small universe.
your warmth and light
growing the deeps roots
of my love into a mighty tree.
with your light shining
from your eyes.
In thier mirror
I kiss you forever.

Out of time


I feel the flames
raging inside of me.
They flow from my fingertips
burning all I touch.
The world is spinning
faster and faster.
I lay on its surface
and grip it
trying to slow it down.
I run the other way
but it it relentless.
I pray to the rain to cool me.
The soft clouds to bring me shade.
The wind to give me air.
But I am burning
all the fuel of my time.
I feel the raging flames
inside of me.
And I am almost
out of time.

Love letter to my soulmate.
by
Jude Kyrie

For so long I have waited.
Waited to see your smile
to hear your voice
to look into your eyes.

I know you are looking for me
for I am the one
who is your destiny.

Let your soul travel
when you sleep my love.
Let it look in the far reaches
of Land sea and space.
Even on the dark side
of the moon.
For I have released my soul
on a quest to find you.

I know when our souls meet
they will know each other
from many lifetimes
And they will dance in the light
filled with joy.

Do not lose faith
that we will find
each other my love.
For we are real.
We exist.
Just as the stars exist
even when they cannot
be seen in the light
of the sun.

Playing in the rain

*a poem
by
Jude Kyrie

Do you remember my love
we were just children back then.
we played in the summer rain.
Dancing in puddles.
Splashing in rubber boots.
I think that's when
I fell in love with you.
I knew even then
we would marry one day.

Remember we always
loved walking in the rain
The olive green days
of our life my love.

Then the sickness came
you tried to hide it from me.
but I knew ...I knew.

Remember that last day
my love.
you asked is it raining
I said yes my love.

Take me outside you said.
Dance with me in the rain
just once more.

Now  when I feel
lonely and sad
I stand in the pouring rain
and can feel you close.
and the gentle pure rain
washes away my tears.

I look at. the art on the gallery wall
it is a picture of you and I.
This is the picture you created
with your pallet and brushes.
The touch of your brushes
on the canvas
set my moods
my visions
my feelings.
my life is in your artist hand.
you mix the colors and hues
on your pallet and create
my passions and needs
and my salvation.
I love it when you paint me.
always paint me
with your heart.
Paint the fire of my wants.
Paint my submission
to your beauty.
Let your eyes see only me.
Mix the color of our love
on your pallet my love.
A beautiful color
and call it us.
color me in that hue.
color me yours forever.
and sign it
our masterpiece

I miss your gentle loving voice
I miss your fragrance
but have no choice.
I call for you
but only echoes respond.
In a cavern inside my soul.
echoes of you
only of you.
And when my time comes
to join you on high.
I will know then
that only the love exist
like a giant rainbow
between
heaven and earth.
But in my
earthbound dreams
I am a little boy
and you still hold
my hand.
Then I know
you are with me forever.
I love you Mom.

From your son
Jude

Lending money to friends
a parable or maybe a joke.

Two best friends were talking.
can you lend me five hundred dollars
I have so many bills this month one said.

yes but I must get it back next month
the other replied.
for sure next month he said no problem.

a month later
do you have my money
not this month next month he said
ok no more excuses.

another month  later
well do you have my money.
no but you can have my dog.
he shows an old sick
bald  toothless dog
that did its business everywhere.
and says OK one last month
that's all I want my money.

Another month goes by.
well do you have my money
he said angrily.
no but you can take my wife.
he looked carefully
at the offered lady.
then replied
can I take another look
at that dog.

The curve of the rising sun
slipped silently over the
edge of the earth.
bringing the first
magical rays of sun.
like the beginning
a new day had begun.
The rays fell upon
the lakes wavelets.
sparkling like
countless diamonds.

The sunlight lifted me
to the seashore.
even the gulls and seaspray
whispered the voice
of my true love
yet to be found.
She whispers to me
soon so soon my love.
A flock of seagulls
lifted me upon graceful
thermals.
I could see you
on a distant shore.
I exchanged hearts with you.
the words I love you.
Fell from my tongue.
The day ended
a new one begun.
Our love peeked
over the horizon
just like the sun.

Never fade away
by
Jude Kyrie

I can still find you
even in the distance
of forevers eternity.
Your vision is a memory
from my hearts souvenir box.
I grip it harder this memory.
but it is like golden sand.
the harder I hold a few
grains fall from my
hand like tears.
The southern winds
kiss my face with seaspray.
If I close my eyes
I feel your lips on my cheek.
the wind sings through
the seagrass.
I hear your comforting voice
whispering to me.
I replace the remaining grains
of your golden memory.
Back into the safe
keeping of my heart.
And whisper to you.
Never fade away
my beloved.

Things I want for you

i want to capture
the breath of mist
that rises from a water lily
in the first summer light.
but above this
to capture the reflections
of sunlight that falls upon your skin
when morning calls a new day.

I want to taste the perfume
of flowers on my tongue.
and to shine like
the dreaming moon
as you fall asleep.

I want to be in your dreams
spending the sleeping hours
still with you.
and to be there
as your eyes open
in the awakening dawn.

I want to plant seeds of love
in the fertile green valley
and harvest thier fruits
all though the years.

I want to cherish you
and give all my  purest
love to you.

Today I left for work early
Quietly so as not to
wake you and the children.
The day went by so slowly
All day I wanted
Was to be with you all.
Time stood still in the afternoon
I hardly did any work.
All I wanted
was to hold you
and hug the kids.
I picked up a speeding
ticket on the way home
I did not care.
When I got to our house
I rushed in the door
And the kids hugged me
I looked for you
And kissed you so hard
You said
wow what's that for?
I tell you honestly
You have a romantic fool
On your hands.
One that is to the brim
Happy with his life.

You and I
By
Jude Kyrie

*We have suffered
the same wounds
you and I.
Wounds that poured blood
from the same places.
I know we can survive
This I am sure of

We share the same scars
You and I.
Cuts across our hearts
But now they are a lost memory
In a past so far away

We share the same love
You and I
Never ending
Always re-growing
Every year that passes
like the sweetest seasons.

My River

Take all of me My River.
Flow me to your vast oceans.
Meander with me
with your graceful curves.
Let me scale your mountains
that walk the earth with you.
Let me find the valley
That you call your fertile place.
Hold me close My River
Wash my sins away
with your pure waters.
Fill my heart
with your loving thoughts.
Never leave me empty
Take me with you My River
wherever your waters flow
I will float with you.

Waltzing Jude

I quietly see you in my mind
in silent moments of reflection.
I see the white dress
of our wedding day
the soft hair flowing
under the veil.
a breeze showing it loose freedom
that I will soon feel.

The old pipe ***** plays Bach
Jesu lord of man’s desire
We dance in waltzing circles
Around and around
spinning spinning spinning.

The constellations in the starlit sky
call your shining eyes to join then.
You are singing to me
from the book of love.
I love it when you sing to me.

Even after all these years.
You must know this my love.
Our love is like a waltz
spinning forever in circles
and it goes on and on and on.

Places
A Poem
by
Jude Kyrie

I went to a place
where the night birds sing their song.
It was beautiful

I went to a place where the sea
meets the sky in the horizon
it was stunning magenta.

I went t a place where
the eagles soar over mountains
It was pure and light

I went to a place
Where a lovesick fool
Pours out his love
to the woman there
it was home.

Winters icy patterns
Adorn the window pane
The moon a glitterball
  of snowflake
it's Christmas tide again

Boots are crushing snowflakes
All about the tiny town
Carrollers singing in the distance
A joyful Christmas sound.

My boyhood heart is bursting
Theres no other time like this
As under the hanging mistletoe
My parents share a kiss

now older my chrismas times
Are busy filled with modern toys
But in my heart I feel a longing
For a time of simpler joys

Sunday evenings
are when you come to me.
Half asleep in my chair
you are there.
Half a lifetime
you have been gone.
But it melts to now in seconds.
At the view of your face
so beautiful to me.
I am your little boy again mom.
living in the old house?
You fix a band aid
on my cut knee.
kiss my tears away .
be a good little soldier you say
but I was not there
to tend your wounds mom
God knows that's all I wanted.
Thirty years have passed
yet still I am not over you.
I look into our old parlor
you lift a lock of hair
from my eyes
more as a gesture
of deepest affection.
and for a second
I feel you are telling me
I still belong to you.
When it's my time mom
meet me at heavens door
because even with infinity ahead.
I don't want to lose
a second with you
I love you mom.

I should not have asked for………..

Somewhere a clock is ticking
Even from across the world
Its ticks deafen me.
Endless silence drags on time
A second feels as like an hour.

I am sitting alone next to
an angry silent telephone
Angry as you are
As silent as you are.

If you don't talk to me
The rainbow will lose its colors
The  night tbird will stop its song
And the sun will hide behind
Dark grey clouds.

I should not have asked
for your heart
It was yours not mine
The scars left when
you gave it to me
Were too much
for you to give.

If you don't tak to me
No songs will be written
No Poetry will rhyme
Amd my silence
will fill the world

I should not have asked
for your soul.
It is your infinity.
Your redemption not mine.

The silence grows louder
The winds of darkness blow
I taste the unknown fruit
All that is left in the world
Is silence
And my love for you.

Gone Girl
A Poem
BY
Jude Kyrie

I still feel your fingers
slipping away from mine.
Like the grains of sand
that escape from your hand
No matter how hard you hold.
I can still see the thoughts
Of me that once
lived in your mind now
spilling onto the floor
and dying in the sunlight.
I still feel you dropping
my heart on the ground.
Watching it shatter like
a crystal glass.
I still feel the approaching
afterlife without you.
Whispering a tiny comfort
In the cold breezes of loss.
Promising to me
that love will call again.

When You Are Far Away
By
Jude Kyrie


In the desolate chasm
of your absence my love  
I send to you
A rose every second
From my heart
Breathe their fragrance
singing in the night winds
A red rose every second
Sixty roses every minute
Just to let you know
Where your home is

As a very small boy I heard
a shy whisper from behind
The old tree in the woods.
Quietly I saw a strange animal
Unlike any that existed  anywhere else
I befriended it and fed it
nurtured the creature and named
it my existence.
It slept with me,breathed as I did.
It grew strong and tall.
I taught it many skills  it could perform.
Then one day it snarled at me
Baring fierce fangs and looked like death.
I realized it wanted to see me dead.
In fact it was  sure one day I would die.
Since that moment it sits in the corner
of my bedroom.
It looks at me asking nothing of me.
In fact needing nothing from me.
Never sleeping it is
just waiting for something.
I ignore it and we have a mutual truce.
But I dont trust it anymore
It wants to **** me.
But I know in my heart
One of us
is not going to survive this thing.

wrap me in your poems
feed me with words of silk
quench my throat with dreams
as pure as ice cold milk.

dance me  in. your verses
full of love's sweet  song
sing to me your chorus
and dream me all night long

fill my life with laughter
fill my heart with love
fill my house with children
and blessings from up above.

I am the faded memory
that hangs upon your wall
The night birds calls my tune
as the saddest notes will fall

I am the faded photograph
that lives in an ancient memory box
along with ribbons and birthday cards
and a  pair of infants Sox.

I am the distant sound of silence
that rings upon your heart.
that wakes you up from deepest sleep
and cause the tears to start.

I am the love that's passed on bye
leaving longing in your soul
I am part of you your other half
that you need to feel quite whole.

Tonight the sky and sea are one.
Both dark and endless
the aegean sea swells
beyond the small
overcrowded craft.
Behind us terror and injustice
beyond us the unknown
world of the West.
The full moon shines it's light
I see the face of God on it.
in the waters of the swollen sea
I see the faces of my children
and the smile of my wife.
Closing my eyes in reverence
I pray to a God I only half believe
in  for forgiveness
A god that knows my frailty
and in my desperation
I ask him to vent his wrath
upon me.
And to spare the innocence
of my wife and children.

Pisces lover
by
Jude Kyrie

*when he lay beside me
in the ink of nighttime poems.
I could hear the peaceful
ripples of lazy
mountain streams
or the cry of a dolphin
far away in the guiding
light of the sea.
Even his dreams
sparkled with sunbeams.
His breathe of sleep
sang lullabies from
a dreamy meadow.
And when he touched
me with his fingertips
it spoke in a language
that needed no words.
As he swam in the
deep waters of the
picean sea.
He held my hand
as we explored
the magical realm
of his gentle kingdom.

Like the gentle wind that carries prayers
beyond the stars to heavens door.
Like the glowing heat of loves desire
that burns silently inside like a fire.
Like the silence of a child in sleep
without a sound its dreams it keeps.
Like the silent breath of a summer night
stirring softly sweet and light.
Like the knowing glance in a lovers eyes
filled with longing need and sighs.
Like the becalmed stillness of the lake
waiting for the dark to break.

This is how I want to give myself to you

The day I fell in love with you.
\By
Jude Kyrie

We were just children
when I fell in love with you.
I Remember the sky
was deep  summer blue.
The lake was blue
Even the dragonflies that skimmed
the lake water were blue.
I was black and blue
Stepfathers are not always kind.

You saw me sitting on the dock
My feet hanging into the cool water
I can feel your slim arm
Fold over my shoulder
And you're too blonde hair
fell like my teardrops
as it fell onto my back.

I fought back the tears
That your small act of kindness.
Dragged from my young eyes.
I ached to turn and kiss you.
To smell the freshness of
the summer wind in your hair.

But the courage had been
beaten from me.
By him who stole
the joy of my childhood.
Replacing it with
pain and violence.

So I sat quietly
I am sorry I did not
shout my love that filled
my young heart
so loud it would have carried
Along the surface of the lake.
all the way to the sea.

I wrote love poems to you
But never sent them.
And I let you move away
without saying goodbye.

All My life through the years
I have searched for the little
fruit of sweetness and warmth
You gave to me that day.
The one we bit into
until the juices
drained down our shirts.

I will find it again.
As I will find you.
For I am now healed
And my love for you
Will be loud and clear
As I shout it
from the rooftops
for the whole world to hear.*


Authors note
let childhood glow

age 5

Why did you leave me mama
I miss you so bad
Did I do something wrong
Am I still your little boy

Age 12
I still think of you mama
Even after all this time
Sometimes when I fall asleep
I see you mama so beautiful

Age 20
I.can't remember your face mama.
It's been too long you are
fading like an old tune
I have not heard in years

AGE 30
You have almost become
A memory mama
Why did you never call me.
I know even now
I would put my arms around you
And say I love you.
People say it was too hard
For you to see me
And that you still loved me
I smile and nod.

But deep inside
I know it's something
Less than love
Yes for sure
Something
much less than love

I am grieving for the blueness
of the summer clear skies.
Soaring over
the snow capped
mountain peaks.
The graceful.gliding of eagles
On unlimited thermals
Free and wild
Like I once was.
Before chains of duty
And demands of others
Broke my wings

on quiet rainy days is
when the stones whisper their
secrets to you of the old ways,
Telling stories of all they have seen.
Waiting to return to the blue waters.
Smoothing in the fine sand.
polished as soul in a state
of grace.
They speak of your soul
of its perfect roundness and
its smooth  texture.
How it will return one day
to the place it belongs.
How the sands of time
will polish its glow just like
the stones have smoothed.
they will promise
Of a time
when it is ready to return
to the clear crystal
waters of infinity
it too will then
whisper it's joyous
stories of a life traveled well.

it's raining poetry this day.
The trees have
unfurled buds
and cascade poems
of fragrance.
tonight the stars
sing nocturnes
As they create a lighted
road through the night sky
even the Nightingale
sings poetry in music.
springtime blossoms poetry
in every heart.
Poems that turn
into love songs
I want to drown
in its tenderness.
I am drenched
to the skin
in  beautiful words.

Cover me with beauty my love.
build me a pool of beautiful words
drown me in your poetry
drown me in your art
paint pictures on my skin
quieten the morning
with beautiful music.
whisper sounds of love
and bury them in my heart.
Dance me through
children and laughter.
Fill the room with smiles
and I shall open
a barrel of contentment
and spill it's contents
all over our home.

looking from my window
into the night filled Street.
I watched a couple
kissing a last goodbye.
They held each other
almost in mourning
of what they once were.
Still talking neither
one wanting to be the
first to leave.
then they both turned
and walked away
in opposite directions.
after a few paces
she turned and looked back
the lamplight glistened
in the tears
that fell down her face.
She passed a piece
of her heart in that glance.
but he did not look back
and he took it with him.

It was raining the moment
that I fell in love with him.
He was writing a sad poem.
He said it's easier to find
the words when the sky weeps.
I told him I walk in the rain
sometimes to wash the world
from my heart.
he asked me to play him
into my music
to write him in a song
that would be an old standard.
To lose him inside its soft lyrics.
To play his song everyday
of my life.
I touched his beautiful eyes
wet as the drifting lazy rain.
And my heart whispered
I love you so much.
Are you sure
it's not just the rain
he asked.
My lips met his
and he entered the door
in my heart
that I had left open
for so long.
As he entered
He saw the rain inside.
and I quietly closed
it behind him.
for the first moments
of our last forever.

In the bloom of the night
we lie together
Until morning light
first time of forever and
alone again never.

We have no past
no others but us.
all through the night
all through the night

Outside a lamplight flickers
inside we reach for us
The night bird
croons its song
our hearts now sing along

we have started
a journey so right
our hearts are in flight.
all through the night
all through the night

Hold me near
And hold me tight.
This tender spell
you cast this night.
It is La Vie en Rose

When you kiss me
an angel sighs.
And when
I close my eyes
I see the Vie en Rose

When you hold
me to your heart.
Visions of roses start
in a world where roses bloom

And when you speak
Choirs sing from above
Whispered words
turn into love songs.

Oh give your heart
and soul to me.
And life will always be
La Vie en Rose

Listen little traveler
you must know this.
You were born from
a speck of stardust
that traveled from
the edge of time.
you were carried
by the winds of destiny.
and the breath of God's.
Your eyes are bright
with reflections
of all the stars you saw.
Your heart is strong
and unmarked
waiting for love.
Glowing like the
full moon.
For a while
I shall think of you
as mine.
But stardust cannot
be owned.
And one day
you will rise up
in the night sky
And shine
like the bright
star you are.

I loved you so long ago
when my heart was filled
with hope and trust
and had no scars.
Back when tenderness
was all I knew of love.

Even now what is left
undamaged of my heart
still loves you.

You walks softly in the
shambled ruins of my heart
on dark lonely nights.
like a familiar ghost
full of memories
and lingering in
the living world.
Wailing in echoes.

I try to let others
into my heart.
but your jealous
ghost haunts the
night hours
and they
cannot stay.

Alone and lonely
I know you
do not want me
but will not let anyone
else have me.

Tonight I feel lost in the mist of time
No existence no name no purpose
Just a flickering candle burning
in the darkness waiting for the
end of the wick to fizzle  in molten wax.

Now I feel the frost
of a frozen domain.
I am cold with no feelings
Send me warmth
melt my soul.
Before old age carries it away
let me love.
let me write.
let me create again.

I whisper prayers to a silent God.
Remember me
oh lord of all things
If I am not forever lost then
Write my name on heavens wall.
Lift me to the mountain top.
Where heaven can be seen.
Up high to an eternity of lightness.
Touch my face with your hand
fill me with all that is you
and let me see who I really am.

Sitting silently in my chair
watching you intently.
quietly so that you do not
notice my observing.
The years have run by like a deer
No matter what issue
we face you stay calm.
Deal with it and let it pass.
I see you as the glue
that holds this place together.
I do not remember the last time
I had to worry about the children..
The newscast shows carnage and death.
It flickers across your face unnoticed.
Wearing your silence
like a comfortable Sunday sweater.
I wonder sometimes
just what you are thinking about.
All I know is the fact
you are the island I need.
Peaceful and solid, the anchor
that holds me safe in this harbor.
You have the strength
I borrow to face adversity.
You are the sun at the center
of my small universe.
It’s no wonder I love you.