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The innoncence is dying inside of me
With every exposure to evil tearing it out
No purpose in sewing these wounds
It's universally seen as normal
To lose an optimistic outlook

After this year it'll be completely vanished
I'll share the same laughter
But it will never reverberate again
Not after my innocence comes to an end
Bare feet on long beach
So short was our time together
Sands slipping to sea
What's your lover done to you
Now that your worlds' are changing
She's beating up your head
Baby, where have you gone?
This just isn't you, I need you to know.

And I wonder if that's a good enough excuse
To trample on something we've nourished for so long
To destroy my stems on and on
Or if there's any excuse at all.
Oh, here we go again, here we go...

No one matches up to your dynamite
No matter what you believe
You're the only true friend
I've not got by my side these days
You know what I'm like:
Cynical, sarcastic, sometimes a little contrite
But I need you to know, this isn't my half anymore.
Just show me a little respect before you bring the tyrant around to my door...
Again...

I wonder if there's an excuse
For you to tear my limbs apart
If there's one for bringing me down
Lying on the ground,
Water dripping from my sides
While the world continues to turn.
I don't want to be the one, don't want to feel this hurt -
No excuses, no where to hide.
I need her back by my side, before the night implodes and leaves me alone.
Leaves me dry, again.
Let’s not forget our childhoods
Like playing in the rain, getting drench, and loving it
The scene I remembered most, was i watching Peggy the small dog,
in the window across the street.
While, the neighbors keep up their lawns, and areas neatly pruned
With the dull chopping sound of the cutlasses, early in the morning:

I generally held a book close to my face, while reading
But somehow, on that day, I kept  staring at the house across the street
I don’t remember if I had done my chores or not,
before the lady in this photo came home that day for lunch.
For her, it was all about keeping up appearances,
Dinner at six, all school shoes must be polished before seven
and our Immaculate uniforms, must be hanging on the ironing board.

And no matter what,
all lights must be out before ten o’clock.
“Don’t forget to say your goodnight Prayers, she would have said”
Lately I've been thinking about childhood a lot

Suddenly, my thoughts turned to my first soap opera, Peyton Place,
Woody Allen, Mia farrow, and all my childhood memories came to a haul with…images of my friend Dolly Benskin and her daughter Paige:
Paige die at an early age: which haunted me for years..
why so young?

I use to love smoking candy cigarettes, but not between my toes
This morning of all mornings,
bonds with the carpet fibers is a piece of candy
i loved you the way
i believed summer
would melt,
fell into your arms
the way i could only
ever fall with you.
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