Please
stop me if I speak to much
but don't blush when I punch you
when the brink of my preach gets rough
cause what kind of lover am I
and what kind of family man
who leaves when he wants
letting go of softer hands
and with no thought out reason
cause it was christmas and I loved you
and soon it will be christmas again
without either fingers
or arms or wrists or anyone
tearing toys on the floor
I want more of this
you see
but I fight a demon inside of me
& he doesn't like to see me happy
does he

I quit being okay with this
I quit feeling like I can't breathe
and hiding everything that's real to me
it's my choice right?
to throw in the towel
and just forget it
to just be me
I just want to be with me
no one sees that
cause everyone just wants
what feels good to them
and I don't want to feel good to anyone
anymore
I don't feel good anymore
I just want to be a friend
to a friend
who knows how to be a friend to me
because my heart is heavy
how could you know
when you've never held it
it's heavier than ever
and my chest wasn't built for it
and how could you know
if I don't speak of it
I never speak
and I want everything
but i can't get a thing
silently
acting like this
soon no one will want it
and who am i kidding
i'm left kissing the inside of this door
i keep *slamming

Like this.
Like that.
Like this
likes that
that likes
these & those.
Liken this
to that
lichen which
grows
so slow
over corpse & stone,
the likes of which
so few know
or like, let alone
love, like
we know
we should.