Old Florida It goes without saying All Rights Reserved. (Disclaimer: These poems are non-commercial, personal poems to be used for educational or research purposes only. "Fair use" is claimed under U.S. copyright law, sections 107 and 108. No commercial use is permit 200 followers / 20.6k words
Try to tear the words from my lungs, I have nothing to say. Claw the flesh from my ribs and find my chest empty. Eyes the non color of rain drops that give you nothing to grasp. Come to me seeking nourishment salvation from a ghost is not forthcoming. I hate you for the helplessness you foster the mute hunger of the drowning woman. Go from me and forget my name I have nothing else for you.
I filled my veins with forgetfulness to escape the knives in your eyes and the thunder of the drums in my ears; Empty me out as water into a sieve and leave me here for the jackals.
I once read a post that said something along the lines of “I do not trust people who tell me ‘I love you’ and yet do not love themselves.”
And that hurt my heart, it really did.
Who are you to invalidate my love?
Do you not know of the sleepless nights I have spent, laboring over my sins of the day? Knowing that sometimes I may never repent? With past regrets and paranoid overthinking, how do I rest?
Do you not know of how I avoid looking in mirrors throughout the day, or how I hate looking at myself in the shower? Don't you know how conflicted I feel when lying naked and vulnerable with my lover?
Do you not know what it feels like to apologize for who you are? Or to have all of your efforts and ethics invalidated and dismissed?
If you do not trust me then so be it, but do not reject the idea that I can love. I know what it means to have neither hope nor acceptance, I know what it means to regret my existence.
I know what it feels like at 4am with all the lights out with the absolute conviction that I am entirely worthless.
I know **** well what it feels like to be unloved. Does that not make my love *mean that much more?