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 Feb 2014 James Ellis
ck
You are helpless,
I know.
You are miserable,
I know.
There is nothing I can do,
I know.
I know you are gone.
I know.
the air put your head in my own
said youll never leave me alone
but when will it scare you to stay
you walk, you cannot walk away
i need you to learn how to breathe
undo what youve done to the breeze
the weight will be carried by few
but shared until nothing is true
is that what you want to desire
to make of yourself but a liar
ive heard all the thoughts you dont speak
theyre all too familiar to me
you dont have to hide in my head
it mustve been something i said
the predecessor of the modern rifle
On a blessed morn, a sunbeam kissed me on my forehead,
and at that immortal second, exchanged with me
the secret of the knitted design of the whole universe,
an orchestra of million pieces, that plays for ever
but how can I express it to another unless that  heart is resonant?

I am one among that tribe spread out, to far corners,
that would rather receive riches in our souls,
your voice like songbird's fly high, the music wakes up the valley,
I desire to touch your voice with my fingers, like I hold you
around your waist, we swirl, wind carries the cloud, tenderly
I yearn to lick the honey oozing from your voice
and wing to a Nirvana high, as the narcotic  dissolves
in my saliva slowly, then spread in my blood, beyond body limits.

You are a swirl of fragrance, a high note, touching the zenith of eternity,
I wanted to be the base note to keep you anchored, in here and now
my ethereal flame will embrace your light, together we'll
take flight, light our path and be limitless.
Heaven, Where all Poets Go

dedicated soully to Kripi Mehra
who unknowingly commissioned this piece
with her love and feeling for those who
dare to fare on just words, only to
sally
forth unafraid and unashamed

~~~~~~~

to the conclusion cut,
not knowing how we know what we know,
       knowing that of this cut,
this one,
as real as anything worth writing about,
not knowing how but demonstrating a modicum of erudition

yet,  
clarity this time no stranger,
no remonstrating, endless debating, easy
come, and even easier go,
all poets (and lost-to-early children) go to heaven,
even the bad ones

stop with the teasing give us the reasoning

nah nah nah always in a hurry to get to the
bottom, move on, write yet another,
restless young'uns, girls and fellows,
even you old, small ones, who still can't spell
your own name
or rhyme, those slow mo yokels, national symbols,
the ones that seem never to ever catch their star,
the mothers across all oceans, who need childlike tendering,
Indian girl chiefs, boat captain historians, word magi-bus-riding hallway eavesdroppers, **** British girls, nurses, wonderers and after-life lusters,
burnt baby healers

learn that this self seal-selected profession
is an endless deal, profession rhymes with heaven,
you need to luxuriate in the long journey,
pink patience before you raise you glass

but OK, just this once,
the secret you have may have already read!
pass it along, as it was given to me
by one of us, poet laureate far better than I ever could be

Down in the sounding foam of primal things I
     reach my hands and play with pebbles of destiny.
I have been to hell and back many times.
I know all about heaven, for I have talked with God.
I dabble in the blood and guts of the terrible.
I know the passionate seizure of beauty
And the marvelous rebellion of man at all signs
     reading "Keep Off."
^

that is what poets do daily with each ecrive,
each line of metered musique mystique,
and with stanzas lighter than air,
a piece of you breaks off, floats upward,
and when the day is done,
the struggling striving breaking apart,
be now over,
all poets go to heaven to collect themselves,
their entire pieces of writings, called their collected works,
all the pieces reassembled,
you are at last, at last, at rest, whole, satisfied and undenied,
where poets, brave soldiers of all ages deserve to be,
heaven resting
Kripi Mehra: "A slogan- Always remain a fool
I wish I could write a poem on the title " Let's Convert Hello Poetry Into Heaven"..."
But you did, you did....

^  see http://hellopoetry.com/poem/600071/the-sounding-foam-of-primal-things/ where Mr. Sandburg is credited in full

"So raise your glass if you are wrong
In all the right ways, all my underdogs
We will never be, never be anything but loud
And nitty, gritty, *****, little freaks
Won't you come on and come on and
Raise your glass!
Just come on and come on and
Raise your glass!"
Lyrics by Pink, "Raise Your Glass"
This time will pass us by
but know my unconscious mind
is still making love to you

for my Valentine if I had one.
every time i hear your voice
i just think of how
it would sound
breaking out of pleasure,
gasping,
your mouth open in
surprise to the
silk of my touch,
how it would sound sighing my
name out
tickling the hair that
falls lightly around my neck.

i want your honey
voice
dripping from your
quickfire tongue
soaking me
so i am sweet and stung
fresh from the hive
i want you to make me

scream
"are you depressed?"

i wipe my eyes of
slow
grogginess,
i pull myself struggling out of a
fluctuating dream state to rest
temporarily in reality.

"what?"

"oh well... wanting to sleep through everything, and never
wanting to do anything is one of the
leading causes of
depression"

thanks i really had no ******* idea

"well i had it all through middle school
so i wouldn't be surprised."

"maybe you should talk to someone about it,"

i packed my things
angrily
loud, in her
echoing teal classroom,
and left quickly.

*she really has no ******* clue
you know what i will not do?
i will never, ever pity myself again.

what is there to pity?
i have everything i need;
i have a golden body filled with fulfilled actions,
and nights to live through
to rest my tired head on
some grassy hill when darkness is fading
and know that i have lived another day
and i will live so much more.

i will
take a deep breath,
tilt my chin,
and hold myself with this strength
pirouetting within me.
and i'll feel every one of my emotions like
they are
the early dawn itself,
skimming their bodies above mine,
sinking into my growing,
stretching skin,
lighting fires inside of me,
i'll let them burn inside me like
bonfires on hills with small pieces of paper
shrinking to ashes as black as
the fingers that caress my body
on empty mountain tops.

i will create even more of a woman within myself,
filled with
everything i have ever *******
dreamed to create inside of my whirling
*******, and
erupting heart.

i will walk,
and my steps will shake this earth.

i will never pity myself again,
because i will wake up with
the ******* sun shining out my eyes;
i am everything i have set out to be.

i will not tread lightly upon
my life,
afraid.
i will step with purpose,
i will make my actions
create a masterpiece of life,
i will make being alive an
art.
i will make a dent in this atmosphere,
i will spill, contract, expand, dance, explode
because this is my life,
and i will stop cradling it,
i will grasp it
and
i
will
run.

i am the roaring of motorcycles attacking
cement,
i am paint splattered canvas, sketch grooves in paper
carved in a frenzy,
ink stained palms,
i am the blazing sun, and its wrathful heat.
i am stumbling words, creating
rivers across
sleeping faces,
i am feet racing,
in cold winter air, breath slapped with one thousand
whisking tree branches,
i am a weary spine,
bent over four in the morning pages of sloppy poetry,
heart spilled all over like clumsy sipped coffee,
i am drunken truth,
i am real,
i am whole,
i am.

STOP PITYING YOURSELF
AND BE

ALIVE
e·piph·a·ny  [ih-pif-uh-nee]  
noun, plural e·piph·a·nies.

a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.
 Feb 2014 James Ellis
Àŧùl
Angel?
 Feb 2014 James Ellis
Àŧùl
In That Moonlit Night Standing In The Abaft,
Watching The Towed Flaccid Wooden Raft,
I Thought That I Saw An Angel Resting,
Lying Exhausted There In That Craft.

I Call The Girl Out Unbeknownst Of Her Kind Name,
"Hey Young Lady!!" To Which She Didn't Much Respond,
She Looked Up Towards Me Once In Anguish & Collapsed,
I See Desperation In Her Amber Eyes & Resolve To Help Her.

The Crewmen Had Now Been Doing The Paddles After Resting,
I Summon My Captain & Ask, "Do You See That Girl In The Raft?"
The Senile Captain Smiles To Say, "Commodore, Better Get Married,"
I Look Just Clueless To Which He Simply Replies, "There Is No Girl."

True He Was As She Had Simply Disappeared,
I Started Thinking Of My Sleep Needs That Day,
I Looked Around Again In A Hope To Find The Girl,
I Had Compromised My Routine As The Commodore.

Then I Immediately Realized It Was My Wild Phantasm,
Now This Was Just A Plain Illusion Of A Tired Sailor's Mind,
No Mermaids Could Have Ever Existed In Reality & Were Fake,
I Turned Towards The Deck To Go Back To My Bunk For Sleeping.

As I Climbed Down The Stairs To Enter My Room Amazed & Dazed,
I Saw Her Standing And Waiting For Me By The Side Of My Bunk,
I Accepted That Delusion Of My Mind & Started To Lie Down,
She Said, "I'm As Real As Your Thoughts, Don't Fear Me."

She & I-Me & Her, Had The Best Time That Night,
In The Morning She Was Gone & Was Just Gone,
Disappeared Into Thin Air While I Was Asleep,
Each Day I So Dearly Long For Her To Return.
November 28, 2012 poem.

7 Stanzas Of A Beautiful Open-Eyed Dream Written In A Lonely Evening Reflecting Upon What I Lost Due To The May 7, 2010 Accident.

Read the entire Angel Saga by me, Atul Kaushal.
https://hellopoetry.com/collection/13567/the-angel-saga/

My HP Poem #19
©Atul Kaushal

I thank you all so much for the overwhelming response that this poem has received.

If you get interested in reading any of my novels after having read this poem then do visit https://www.amazon.in/Atul-Kaushal/e/B00NIQ5MTC/ for buying any of my stories.
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