~

Burned out

A breath singed my way
Neath an umbrella’s stronghold

As thunderstorms called my name

Stranded in a forgotten footprint
Balanced on the edge of time

I drifted to another dream

Puddled pleasures watched
As I fell within your heart

Cushioned from injury…outside

Then shelter became my spiral
Spinning downward in fractured darkness

Internally destroyed in a sense

While crowded moonbeams spotlighted
Intentions formed to touch

Gripping reality’s illusion

So a faulty switch sleeps undercharged
In my current state of mind

As burned out filaments disguise me

~

Lost within the fire

Lost within the fire
Burning deep inside
Raging like a river
Flames are going wild
Taking in the ashes
Embers at my right
Left to lost forgottens
On this lonesome night

Cower in the corner
Temperatures they rise
Can’t get any farther
Comes as no surprise
Smoke of inhalation
Crowded on the rail
Unknown acts of kindness
Now to surely fail

Pleaded anguished evenings
Hotter still it climbs
What was once a secret
Easy now to find
Take this heart on fire
Quench it with your love
Showers now are looming
Forming up above

Lift me from this feeling
Love me till the end
Tell me it will happen
One more time again
So it no longer lingers
Deep within my soul
Lost within the fire
That I can’t control

~

Find their hand

Alabaster dreams converge,
neither here nor there,
calling out to one,
finding they respond with a kind hand…happily

Eclipsing hate’s nightmare…patiently

Beyond the window waits hope,
blemished of a drawn curtain
and tempest fears,
which it cries for you…in tears of future joy

Sorrow fuels this hope…relinquishing pain

Reach...for inside a light does flicker,
a soft glow,
calming and peaceful,
beckoning the truth and offering a moment’s peace…quiet solitude

Holding you closely…feel its warmth

For within you lies a heart,
love filled and crafted,
leaping at the word go,
challenging thoughts that bare down…heavily

A friend’s hand helps with the heavy lifting…eternally

Find their hand, it longs your touch,
your smile, your happiness…you

~

Fortress


Stone by weathered cobble I build,
calloused hands ache in sweet surrender
Mortar’d affection of a coalesced consistency,
mixed and blended, bound by love’s tether

Stacking to heights of protective design
Patterned on roaming hillsides, serpentine wanderings,
Lush green fields crawl, blue sky diversions,
as song birds whistle to the day

And I sweat, my brow now drenched,
muscles pushed to horizonary boundaries,
tattered clothes sway in late afternoon breezes
Still I push on, fitting, finding, filling this need

Something so precious as glistening morning dreams,
crystalline musings, fragile bisque castings
Destined for my world, beyond battlefield dawns,
sifting serene country settings…quite peace

The long day ends, I marvel at my accomplishment
steadfast and suited to defend in sunset flames,
turrets of observative reachings soar above
timber and heavy iron chain…gated sanctuary

Now my love you may rest…
beneath starry heavens and comet renderings,
upon your bed of satin feathered sighs…
For I have built this fortress…around your heart

~

Saint of Light

Release these chains of tortured deeds
Along a sculpted veering hedge
On paths this darkness tends its breed
Of jagged cliff, so near that edge

For one false move, lurks footstep dread
Beneath the agony now shown
Within these eyes and lips of red
Heartless wishes winged and thrown

I offer thee a hand so warm
You maiden fair this winter’d breeze
To greet my heart within this storm
Unshackle those in firm release

To lie with me of feathered dreams
And take of all my soul can bare
Your beauty comes of all it seems
In flesh that I do long to share

For of thy ******* my mouth does meet
Aroused in pleasured flitting feast
Rose petal soft, magnolia sweet
To sooth the yearnings of the beast

Of endless days, to hold you near
Pure love doth conquer moistened *****
Melodic whispers call thy ear
Eternally we shall be joined

For I am called the Saint of light
Come taste the flavors scented mist
When now the full moon shines this night
And I partake your temptress kiss

~

Unseen

As if I am not even here…
Unseen by everyone, including myself
Not even a shadow exists
of any form that I recognize as mine

Even though you could see me, you don't
Staring through the dotted lines
of where my heart used to sit
in silhouettes long faded…forgotten

My hand before my face is not there
A heavy fog sifts the loneliness
No foot prints in the mud
remain of where I may have walked…untouched

Still I see you…you smile,
not at me, but somewhere beyond
Running through me, an invisible past
reaching for another…who smiles too

As if I am not even here…

~

The Ocean’s Melody


As tides cast their net along a patient coast,
we lie entwined ~ adrift as a single composed symphony
tempo’d by the pounding surf ~ its constant sensuous rhythm
lulling our hearts, aching, to collide
in one beat’s embrace

Love upon a moistened sandy shore
your swollen lips offer a glistening enchantment
with fingertips delicately seeking ~ caressing ~ stroking
feathery lashes grace twin demure windows
of tender need

Velvet waves wash along our bodies ~ gently
merely to touch you ~ hold you ~ kiss you, is my coastal heaven
With arms of cradling strength ~ kindness ~ ecstasy,
my voice becomes a throaty
whisper of passion’d affection

Now as wandering shadows cross beneath the moon’s glowing care
we too build and recede, feeding our amorous desires
as the fading light relinquishes its hold
and dawn cracks the sky ~
our tide becomes one

Our bond remains unbroken ~
tethered to the ocean’s melody

~

Once More

Deep within this weeping world,
where darkness hides the smiles
behind faded curtains of disbelief
now blocking the sun…waits
two arms longing to hold you,
offering comfort of softened ease
extended from broad shoulders strong,
ready to bear the load
of the sorrow that grips your heart

for it is found of this gesture,
long of these collected words
a friend who cries at the emptiness
which now must clutch your chest,
ripping wounds of a motherly kind
past any scar once felt or healed,
desperate to make whole
these frantic needs circling your mind
retracing each back step of questioned fault

distance may carve miles from stone
and leave falling farther from near,
yet beyond any horizon, any vertical detour
thorned bramble archway or cliffside hauntings,
I will reach, grasp and claw
hoping to lift you from this darkness,
to shine that light of hope
with every ounce of energy my body owns
so that your world may be bright once more

~

My pen pleads

Lonely nights offer moments of silence
and one dish suppers where candlelight seems a waste
Seated with pen in hand, I smooth the ruffles beneath
as if that will help the words flow

Upon closer inspection I find
heart shaped patterns on the dining room tablecloth
mimic the movements of my hand,
layered one atop another, calling on each to oblige

Crossing lines, intersecting at pre-destined points,
repeating in harmony with one another
as my thoughts gather in the tiny squares
of this colored graph paper staring at me, waiting

Moving in sync with butterfly curves on the corners
and scribbled etchings along borders,
fantasies of a mind in a dream state
swirl, touching each box of this formatted design

Folds neatly collect the shapes of spilled ink
seeping slowly through the cloth
like raindrops on a leaf following the veins
in an abstract yet confined flow

To the blurred eye sits nonsense,
a collection of nothing on a vast white sheet
dancing like uneven feet on a rounded floor
of no particular meaning or feature

Yet to me, my penned doodling calls loudly,
even in the darkness of lost words, these patterns,
as is everything found filling me is you…
and my pen pleads in heart shaped longings

~

“Float to me”


Changing directions
In a forestalled motion,
balanced on the side of truth while practicing losing my step
in the rushing waters of life…
I slip

Clinging to a lone branch
I find it blocking the sky, pulling shadows from mist
and teetering on the edge of someone’s sacred sanity

My eyes,
stern and fashioned of blinded occurrences that swallow
the light of day and the masks of sympathetic stares,
focus

For in the distance,
tapestries woven of heartbeats glisten on the ripples of a naked moon beam,
motioning to me in pleasing movements a’ dance on its reflections

Passionately in syncopated volumes she whispers,
louder than the hope now swirling in the rising swells
and broken slivers of drastic wastelands which
sit vacant in my mind

“Float to me”,

I hear as the cool waters so elegantly gather about her perfect feet
Her toes grip the rocky floor in such beauty that I fall helplessly,
allowing nature’s crest to take me, singing me sweetly to this pristine dream

Disbelief churns in fountains of doubt fed wishes and desires
as I submerge in the beauty that is her
Engulfed by white capped rapids beating faster…only my heart
She, with silken fingers plucks me from the surf,
her fragrance, lilac and magnolia, intoxicate me

We stand, shades of the deep sky and starlight beacons illume her face
As fireflies play in the trees and
our lips meet, my pulse floods with fever

Her desperate thoughts invade my elated mind and I agree
Together we plunge to the depths of forever and I slowly drown in her love

~

Beneath this dark…soft, silent sky (awaiting your smile)

  
Beneath this dark…soft silent sky
where starlight teardrops weep
in moon glow feathered sonnets…
my heart seeks
~
Clinging to every hope,
laced of tiny woven dreams
now filtered through weary eyes
and worried sighs
~
Collecting each moment shared
within my weathered hands…mixed
with essence of posy and
butterfly song
~
Woven together in melodic patterns,
colorful arcs on golden horizons
bidding me a good evening while
riding in on the sweetest of mystic zephyrs…
~
as another tear paints my cheek
in transparent worry
and desperate longing for that day
when your smile reappears
~
For here sits my whispered wishes,
behind tufted clouds of life,
touching me with poetic joy,
allowing me to breathe freely
~
Beneath this dark…soft silent sky
where starlight teardrops weep
in moon glow feathered sonnets…
I shall wait…for your smile

~

Deep within the ecstasy of love


I breathe this night of ecstasy on satin sheets we shine
The comfort of your silken skin my dream
Lips so soft and tenderly do bring themselves to mine
Pleasure lives inside this shadowed scene

Wrapped around each other, searing passion fires flame
Tongues now dance in rhythm of this kiss
Drinking of your flavor drives this humble man insane
Falling ever deeper the abyss

Beauty blooms aside me as our eyes meet in the night
My gaze now finds your stare of tempting flow
Perfect is the joy we feel when we are oh so tight
Sensuous of moonbeam light a’ glow

Fingers probe of pleasure as your sighs now brush the sky
Slowly deep within rose petal folds
Glistening of moisture resting smooth of silken thighs
Fantasies of long ago foretold

Intoxicating fragrance as your neck my mouth does swim
Curves to fit these hands of wondered feel
Firm, ***** the blossoms fill my palms of every whim
Pleading moans so hard now to conceal

Lower still my heated tongue paints satin skin so smooth
Trails across your body’s shimmered lines
Your hands, my hair, now clenched to guide, this apple blossom bloom
Allowing me your sweet September wine

Slowly first, then teasingly, I find that wondrous spot
Tighter still my face pressed to your soul
Steady, but a quickened pace, this room, this bed, so hot
Calling out my name you lose control

Tethered breath, an arching back as nectar fills the void
Flavoring our love with sugared cream
Still my movements don’t subside, as once more is enjoyed
Filling of my heart your every scream

Once again our faces meet, as dripping lips now touch
Eye so wide, melodious the glare
Fingers smooth direct me to the place I love so much
Showing me the pathway winding there

Heated is the moment that my love does find your space
Harmonizing movements make their play
Perspiration mingles on our bodies, shadows trace
Soothing as a perfect summer’s day

Deep inside the waterfall does rage against the stream
Tropical sensations do abound
Breathless as I hold you close, so very close to me
Passion is the music of our sound

Fingers clenched, our legs entwined oh never to abate
Lost between a fantasy and truth
Slowly this is just the time the night is getting late
Here its comes the moment of our proof

We’re so close, our bodies locked in majesty of bliss
Before my eyes a most refreshing view
Just to drink your smile with my own upon our kiss
As my every fantasy is you

Rhythmic flashes light our minds as fireworks we see
Not unlike the shooting stars above
Nothing could be finer than to have you here with me
Deep within the ecstasy of love

~

Metamorphosis

Tracing footsteps in the overgrown field
where sunlight and rain drops date
Counting sticker burrs like lemon drops
in a candy counter display
Hitchhikers I remember them called,
lovers of socks and pant legs I think
Each with their own story to tell,
minute worries clinging to that last hope of life

The path, familiar but then again not,
it leads somewhere else now
Dragging shadows like kite strings,
knotted in the weave of its boundaries
Taking in my surroundings and releasing them  
for another may find them useful as well,
I find still no sign of that last phrase,
spoken softly but misunderstood…is my understanding

A collection of stone and gravel stew
finds my shoe souls imaging in the dry dusty paste
Outlines of thoughts, perhaps poetry in oblong shapes and
perfect tread patterns stamped and posted,
showing no indication of my ever being here
Staring now at a cocoon on a lone branch, I see
what my life had been, dark and lonely, dreaming of the colors,
feeling confined but grateful for the transformation

You smiled, I smiled, my wings appeared and I flew,
as might a rainbow on a balloon, soaring until the tiniest speck
in the sky could be me or just something on your glasses
Light headed in a good way, free at last to define love,
the metamorphosis of my heart,
the changing of a man into more than he could hope to be,
seeking and finding that blossom,
sweet nectar, a sugary substance, love deep in the petals of life

Though, no one told me of the life span before hand,
no calendar hanging on my wall with circled dates highlighted in red,
nor a stamp of expiration anywhere on my heart,
good if used by…used by, funny I should write that now
as my attention rests still on this cocoon,
wondering where I went wrong,
somewhere on this path lies the answer…
for I once was a butterfly, just as you will be small cocoon,

at which time you will learn…

it is easier to fly with a heart that is unbroken

~

And no wind


Fierce the winds of reality on wings of painted feelings,
searching for that flower which holds the sweet nectar
Still fighting for that vision that brings hope
as dust and particles of sanity soar past at frightening speeds

Dark clouds seem to touch your frail body,
falling down from angered skies, constantly sustained
For this low pressure folds in the ingredients of sorrow,
while gardens dry into barren wastelands of locked gates

Fighting as you will, strength seems to sneak out the screened door
Weakness lands at your front step, ringing the bell
as the gusts beat you back even further than before
and rains have entered the picture on a calendar page

You, of yearning heart, are sadly a butterfly in a hurricane,
flapping your wings, forcing yourself against the gale
Trying desperately to reach the smiles which once found your face,
Ever tiring as moments from behind come into focus again

A rainbow of shimmering light appears, yet no sun has broken though
Magnificent auras on the walls of cherished dreams form
and the winds subside, at least in your path as  
one thousand butterflies appear to deflect the blustery winds

Loved ones from miles away have gathered, holding fast
of your desires, protecting you as you seek
answers and solutions of a brittle nature now strong,
as any garden wall may stand…they have found your smile    
  
Like a kaleidoscope born of a fearless shield,
friendships carve this path in a steadfast motion
For it is you sweet butterfly who are loved
and no wind shall deter you again

~

3:15 am
~

3:15 am…blurred red numbers tell as
I stir, reaching for what I have seen,
grasping for the moments spent in the presence of beauty
as once again you have visited me in a dream…

Pure white flowing whispered fabrics and butterfly trails
awash of waterfalls cascading and mountain top zephyrs,
rock face delights collect on horizons of hope
as softness frames your luminescent face

My eyes focus in the darkness
as your touch remains real on my skin
I am still while stars sleep in crescent moon hammocks
How can this be, I am alone, yet I was not, for I could see

You were searching for me,
barefoot on lush green vistas, daisy paths and buttercup drops
neath cotton candy clouds suspended
above echoes of love songs harmonizing with our heart beats  

Night outside my window keeps time in silent motions,
slowly sweeping breezes form rhythmic patterns
and poetry settles upon my body
as I continue to write within my now awakened mind

Destiny beckons in fruited winds
as chocolate eyes find luscious views of nature’s majesty
Your skins glows of spring blooms in petal’d bliss
and opal desires in the warmth of the day

But I had found you…you had found me…
my desperate wanderings have shown me the prize, illumined the joy
lingering in your smile…your eyes
your touch which stays with me even as I lay alone…still dreaming

Sun beamed passions follow you, caress you in
dancing shadows of flowing brown hair
breathing of morning glory skies
and shimmering dragonfly wings

At this early hour, with an apricot moon peering through the curtains
and these words which have found me
playing among my thoughts, I now realize
that my every dream is you...you are my poetry

~

Static

Scattered wavelengths
from a worn out speaker
cracking with each unbalanced bass note
Finding my brain on overload
and a slower heart beat
out of tune

Static the union,
tuning dial gone, volume at high
glowing in the corner of cobweb melodies
lingering on a distant shelf
now sinking lower in this
roadside armchair

An empty bottled fortress
collects the pain at my feet
glass brown soldiers stand,
bottle cap mementos flip
like dancing beans on a folding table
at El Mercado

One more for the road
a staggering venture
along crooked dotted lines, weaving nonsense
two at a time, smirking
snickering like a Pryde-ful ending
mimicking the way

Still the static, white noise,
foaming seas on wavelength casualties
and the trees cry, when birdsong of night
haunts with a sound
interrupting the dance of the beer container guards
and I tap a painful toe

Your silence

Your silence wraps me like a worn blanket,
thin and frayed, providing no warmth,
no protection from the cold that invades
my every pore as I sit here
shivering with fear, questioning every shadow
moving outside of the window,
lurking, as if sneering
at this emptiness drenching my soul
with worry and doubt

"The quiet so that I might hear my own heart beat if it weren't broken"  

Lost inside these four walls,
stained and patterned of vacuous dreams,
folding within the plaster nightmares
My eyes wet, red and stoic,
nervously seeking any minute reassurance,
even the faintest of whispers
that you are somehow with me
as I wait, counting dust particles
in the muted sunlight
cowering in this corner
with only your silence…echoing in my mind

~

Passion’d Mountain Top

The air is so much thinner here
Miles find my eyes gazing,
valleys wave in gardenia gestures
and foot prints form in seeking patterns

Smooth stone of rain drop kisses
falls steep in overwhelming beauty
as I reach for a few more steps
of overlooking apex in snowcapped dreams

From this height far above
the sleeping village and sunset ribbons
I can see, more than the mind can imagine
yet not father than my soul can reach

As heart beats in mosaic designs
echo from peak to peak,
they flow on zephyrs of silver clouded beauty,
settling upon your tender skin

Always when twilight horizons form in the east
and starlight canopies unfold
my love soars on breathless whispers
from this passion’d  mountain top…endlessly to you

~

Towards the tree line

I stare towards the tree line,
misshapen and abstract on my eyes
Fading in autumn’s chill and leafless
emptiness that I still cannot see

Oh it is there, screaming at me,
waving in the wind, calling in birdsong
But my eyes travel more…
a distance well beyond any footpath I’ve taken

Shelved on the high land vistas
now filled with charcoal persuasions
So very far, miles on scaled dotted lines,
asphalt tearing at my soles, untied laces drag

Still I gaze, following my heart into loneliness
Reaching for but a hint of a smile,
a fix-all for that broken heart,
a mosaic sponge to catch your tears…I find none

Tossing a stone, it bounces on fielded diaries,
words of pain scribbled before even a thought
Collections of wishes in a four leaf clover pockets,
brushed of life’s unfairness

If only I could hold you,
safely beneath that frown,
gently with the touch of every meaning,
building a wall to turn back the sorrow

Ivy covered in green temptations
breathing of trust and love,
lingering at locked doors to secure peace
And yet, I can only stare towards the tree line…blind and worthless

Alone on a silent shoreline,
sea breeze emotions paint my skin
Sands of time slip away as I count the stars
wondering why so many seem to smile,
when I don’t

Storm fence pickets stand straight,
weathered of years watching
Holding at bay the impending dunes
where my footprints once shared these moments
with another

Salt water teardrops fall,
meeting the beach in sorrow’d pools
lonely silhouettes of my heart shaped shadows
empty and vacant, longing for that one
to forgive

Disenchanted sandcastles disappear with the tide
as do these words we compiled together
never to be written again, on paper or in the sand
Now I only watch my dreams fade into the horizon,
missing you

~

And I fall…down

As the sunset of life reaches out to me
in marmalade swirls…orange sherbet dreams
I follow in loose footsteps,
not sure of the bridges I cross
or those burned in the process

Alone I stumble on braided pebbles,
scattered on this serpentine path,
feeding my mind with thoughts
Peering back on what was,
crying when your picture finds me

Dark tangerine tints line the sky now
for the day…this day…my life
shall soon disappear beyond the horizon
Fading to a tiny speck,
hiding in plain sight where no one can see…or care

Finality sings its sad melody
in fractured bar chords and minor notes
As I again find you invading my soul,
reaching down from my heart,
the place you still reside

And I whisper I am sorry…for the pain
Collections of hurt I did not realize I carried
beneath shiny bows and pretty paper
Sending you away from me…my precious gift,
the loss of all that was me…you

Quicker my steps drive
to that straight line illusion beckoning
Darker still as minutes pass
for I know this end is mine alone
as the moon crests the sea and I fall…down

~

East to West (and back again)

Not even a voice, merely words on a page,
a welcome, a smile, waiting as I lift my eyes
From slumber, kicking out the last of my dreams,
only to find that they do not end

Orange sherbet skies paint my windows
above yawning tree lines at the end of a dirt road
Persimmon outlined shadows
dance about my walls inviting me to look

I grab my cup, hot but needed, step into my shoes
passing through to morning, taking a sip…
I find more beauty than my eyes have seen,
while birds flit from branch to branch

The air is cool, unusual but so very pleasant,
heated days form in my memories of yesterday,
when cool springs were no match for the flamed heavens…
yet perfection now touches my skin

And I see, before me not a morning, not a brilliant sunrise
but you…your words, your touch, finding me at a distance,
telling me that this day is ours, beyond horizons…
East to west and back again…for the beauty of my day is always you

~

I could not look away

I fell into the nightmares of a lover’s distant past
While the whispers in the darkness brought the spell her heart did cast
As it raked across my feelings and I cried out in the night
Did this smile I was wearing fit a little bit too tight
With her nails now painted crimson like the color of my blood
She could walk on my emotions as the silhouettes did flood

This the morning of believing that our time is filled with fate
And I find myself now screaming, "please don’t tell me it’s too late"
She collected every quarter on the number I did call
For she wanted me to know that I could never have it all
Still I crawled into the darkness with my eyes so open wide
And together we were drowning in the motion of the tide

In her eyes was every second of the minutes I could spare
Like a clock that’s steady ticking heartbeat rhythms sent to share
Drinking thirsty from the fountain as her finger it did press
On the chrome implanted wishes of an early moon confess
When I looked off in the distance and her beauty it did play
It delivered an affection and I could not look away

~

Closer still

Long of evening’s moonlit skies
Far beneath its reaching light
Passion claims a lonely heart
As we melt this crimson night

Deeply found of seamless fold
Intertwined our pleasured play
Shadows move on distant shores
As our breath is swept away

Fingers trace along the line
Smooth as silk and spun of love
Moistened dreams in silhouette
Cast of sighing stars above

Tasting slow the sweetest joy
Layered close in rhythm’d time
Dance upon these parted lips
Fruits a’ flowing ~ tempting wine

Formed as one in whispered word
Closer still ~ desires plead
Drenched in heaven’s nectar’d fire
Tenderly to fill the need

Clinging tight as mountains move
Snow capped worries left behind
Deep within this endless realm
Eternally ~ to call you mine

~

Might we…


Might we…
pass on a sidewalk framed by clearance sales
and hot dog vendors
Smiling as to take our attention,
brand our thoughts cosmetically,
alter our daydreams to cast a glow
amidst the haze that is this destiny

Might we…
stand on lonely platforms
watching the smoke in the distance
as the 5:00 o’clock
Sunset Liner approaches
with a full head of steam
distracting our eyes with a forgotten whistle tone

Might we…
whisper meandering thoughts
of great importance on the wind,
wishing them a safe journey
and hoping these words, our love sick phrases
reach the heart of another
sitting in the crowd all alone

Might we…
find if we look beyond the past
covering the darkness
with twinkle lights and glass ornaments,
filling the branches of the future with hope,
that desired happiness
springs from its roots

Might we…
dream of cosmic realities in floral dance steps
on kaleidoscope stairways
winding through our thoughts
delivering us to the floor
just above where our eyes meet

Might we
live in and around long distance shadows
and typed conversations,
dipping into the vast vocabulary
waiting patiently to be shared
between our hearts

Might we…
love

~

No dial tone

Sweet the scent of never knowing
faceless fears and silhouettes
blooming on a hillside
of aqua thoughts and turquoise slippers
changing the colors from dark to light,
blending heartache with feathered features,
transparent in the scheme of these feelings

When disturbing the ant pile it is better to walk off…
then ask directions

Sitting at the table as jealous waiters
take orders from no one, casting neon signs
of daily specials on a blue plate avenue
in rush hour foot traffic, bringing detours with the bill,
expecting a healthy tip for having drawn the blinds
hiding you from peering eyes
and evil grins

Always check the silverware for evidence of previous users
before placing a napkin in your lap

Night brings with it the casualties of a day job,
lonely dreams scattered on splintered park benches
beneath a flickering street lamp illuminating graffiti poems
and wrong phone numbers…
silent as the one you hold in your hand,
wishing for a lighted screen, displaying her name
knowing it will not come

Dialing directory assistance for help in locating
the broken heart app

~

I must

Deep within this pain is a light,
a tiny beacon of hope,
a candle flame flickering in the distance
Telling me that I must follow,
leaving the darkness that has shadowed me behind
where my broken heart can no longer find it

The first step is the hardest...
moving away from my desires, my dreams
Forgetting that there once was a flower
blooming in the garden of my mind,
so beautiful and fragrant...it was love

Even in its wilted state, faded colors,
it is hard to walk away
As each thorn rips at my skin
trying to hold me in place,
reminding me of what we once had
Those moments of mesmerizing bliss

But I must…I must,
reach for something else that waits
somewhere in my future
Unknown to me, hidden beyond my sight
Promises of hope, of happiness, of friendship
of love I need to find…sadly leaving you behind

Why do I have hands?

Why do I have hands,
to touch and to feel
to mold clay into wonderful shapes
to paint smiling faces on canvas,
only to reach and find that I can’t?

Why do I have eyes,
to see the wonders of the day
to close so that I may dream
to send messages of hope with their expressiveness,
only to cry these tears that blur my vision?

Why do I have a mind,
to think and learn
to feel and offer insight
to construct ideas in flowing scenes,
only to imagine what the fear must feel like?

Why do I have a heart,
to live and to breathe
to love endlessly
to feel emotions,
only to break, because you are gone?

Why do I have hands,
when I cannot hold you?